Chuck Norris Volunteers To Lead Texas Revolution

[Blue Belle]

Chuck Norris Volunteers To Lead Texas Revolution
http://www.imdb.com/news/ns0000002/

Martial-arts master Chuck Norris has his sights set on becoming more than a Texas Ranger - he has volunteered to run as the U.S. state's first president.

Norris, who played TV hardman Cordell Walker in hit series Walker, Texas Ranger, has put himself up for the job of running the region after discussing the possibility of the state seceding from U.S. control during a rant on CNN.com's political blog.

The actor, who is a staunch Republican, insists Texans want an independent state after being let down by the American government - and thinks he'd be the ideal candidate to lead the Lone Star state's revolution.

He says, "I may run for president of Texas. That need may be a reality sooner than we think. If not me, someone someday may again be running for president of the Lone Star state, if the state of the union continues to turn into the enemy of the state.

"Anyone who has been around Texas for any length of time knows exactly what we'd do if the going got rough in America."

~~~~~~~~~~~

If wishing could only make it so.

[jobycom]

1. Their actors are way stupider than our actors. nt

[Blue Belle]

2. The sad thing is...

their actors get elected to office.

[jobycom]

12. That's cause their voters are even stupider than their actors.

[XemaSab]

28. Unlike in California

:P

[LanternWaste]

37. Well, someone had to say it...

Well, someone had to say it... :)

[Jack Rabbit]

38. Excuse me from California

[TNOE]

3. LOL

And they don't have very many of them either.

[lies and propaganda]

24. i just fell over! n/t

[Oregone]

4. If anyone has watched Missing in Action 3, you would know just how terrifying this is

He is going to go all Braddock on us. He can take out about a thousand people on his own, with a butter knife....but with an Army behind him? Devastating.

[Enrique]

5. who's going to lead the Alaska revolution?

Janine Turner? :shrug:

Tom Selleck in Hawaii? :shrug:

[Arctic Dave]

6. These guys just don't know to quit.

They are single handedly turning Texas into a laughingstock.

[riverdeep]

53. Please, Texas has been a laughing stock long before this. n/t

[Initech]

7. After all those Chuck Norris jokes how could anyone take him seriously as a leader?

[LynneSin]

8. I think Chuck Norris has had too many roundkicks to the head me thinks

:eyes:

[PatGund]

17. Just remember.....

Without Bruce Lee, people would be going "Chuck Who???"

[CreekDog]

9. I don't want to hear any of these asses whining when we say they aren't patriotic

no way. :rant:

[Lars39]

10. I cannot see Chuck Norris' name without this tune popping into head:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k3Nqguav6nE

Earworm material, fer sure. :D

[SidDithers]

26. That's great! Thanks for posting...

Laughed my ass off at Blue Man Tobias Fünke :rofl:






Sid

[XemaSab]

29. +1

[RandomKoolzip]

11. After Chuck norris visited the Virgin Islands, they were called just "The Islands."

[gratuitous]

19. Texas wouldn't secede from the Union with Chuck Norris as their president

The Union would secede from Texas!

Hmmm. Not all of these work, do they?

[Name removed]

13. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[backtoblue]

27. thank you for not including AR

I shall stand my ground against Texan invaders!!!:tinfoilhat:

:hi:

[XemaSab]

30. You can pry Arizona and Colorado from my cold dead hands!

:o

[pokercat999]

36. They both have incredibility beautiful places but sometimes

you have to sacrifice for the common good. Maybe after a few years when the crazies have killed off a huge portion of their population through gun play, lack of health care, insane criminal laws (death penalty for everything) and other RW policies we could take them back. Of course a few years of only rethug rule and the natural places wouldn't be worth much. I could just see the Grand Canyon National Park outsourced as a landfill, that would work well for Ron Paul.

[Richardo]

14. Norris would be the SIXTH President of Texas - if that clusterfuck were ever to happen

Martial-arts master Chuck Norris has his sights set on becoming more than a Texas Ranger - he has volunteered to run as the U.S. state's first president.

Dumbshits.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Presidents_of_the_Republic_of_Texas

[dysfunctional press]

20. my great-great-great-great grandfather was the first president of that shithole.

sam houston.

[Richardo]

22. I like it here.

:shrug:

[pokercat999]

60. Wouldn't that be a Chuckfuck? nt

[kestrel91316]

15. Isn't this sedition? And isn't it a federal crime?

[Cheap_Trick]

16. Teh stupid! IT BURNS! IT BURNS!

Walker, Texas Fuckwad

[dembotoz]

18. a texas ranger????

Martial-arts master Chuck Norris has his sights set on becoming more than a Texas Ranger - he has volunteered to run as the U.S. state's first president.

i did not know he could play baseball....

[madeline_con]

52. They mean the state cops.

[8 track mind]

21. sweet jeebus, is this dude off his rocker or what........

Chuck's gone mad.

[TCJ70]

23. If Chuck Norris ever decided to rise up against anything...

...anything better watch its back.

[blogslut]

25. Chuck Norris is an Okie

I'm just sayin' ;)

[snappyturtle]

31. CN is delusional as is Perry. Neither has gotten or will get my vote. nt

[Hugabear]

32. It's official then. Chuck Norris is just as much of a traitor as Jefferson Davis was

He speaks treason.

[Teaser]

35. He is Secesh scum

I hate seceshes.

[Teaser]

33. Chuck leads the Texas National Guard against the United States Army

who wins that battle?

[8 track mind]

49. that would be a short fight

somebody would lob a whole bunch of Bar-B-Que, Shiner Bock, and Lonestar beer over the battle lines and the Texas National Guard would have a 'fuck-it' attitude in about an half an hour.

[madeline_con]

54. Will W take his uniform out of mothballs and join the fray?

This is great. :popcorn:

Edit: My brother lives in TX. I wonder what his new address will be. What will they name the new states?

[Z_I_Peevey]

34. Steven Seagal for vice-president,

thus forming the perfect ticket in Bizarro World.

[Ghost in the Machine]

41. Is Steven Seagal a right wingnut?

I didn't get that impression since he's a Buddhist, animal rights activist and Native American rights activist... I've never heard or read anything about his political leanings though.


Peace,

Ghost

[Blue Belle]

43. Stephen Segal is too environmentally concerned to share a ticket with Norris...

I think that's one of his only redeeming qualities.

[Soylent Brice]

39. okay. let's resurrect Bruce Lee to kick this fuckwad's ass again, please.

anyone on board with me on this one?

[sarcasmo]

40. Is Wilford Brimley or Toby Keith going to be his running mate?

[loyalkydem]

42. Sighs

There goes what respect I had for the man that played a character that shares my first name

[Number23]

44. See what Reagan started?

Now every half-baked D-grade actor thinks they can be a Republican politician. Sad thing is, they probably can...

[Kaleva]

45. Motor City Mad Man for VP!! (Ted Nugent)

[sarcasmo]

47. Good one, LMFAO.

[Updike]

46. The shit runs deep in this one young Padewan.

Norris needs to go back to doing "perfect abs with a handjob" videos. This reeks of insanity.

[SammyWinstonJack]

48. LOL!

:spray:

[Vickers]

50. "has his sights set on becoming more than a Texas Ranger"

LOL, is he confusing his acting roles with real life, a la Ronnie Raygun?

:rofl:

[ColbertWatcher]

51. BWAHAHAHAHAHA! n/t

[riverdeep]

55. So let me get this straight, ole Chuck is loudly proclaiming

to overthrow the Government of the United States (through secession), and his fellow nutjobs see this as 'patriotic'. Huh, interesting. Maybe Bill Ayers was a patriot after all.

[MazeRat7]

56. He had better pack a lunch n/t

[MazeRat7]

57. He had better pack a lunch n/t

[dantyrant]

58. Invasion USA!

[Name removed]

59. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[BarbaRosa]

61. How about a Norris/Nugent administration?

:rofl:
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