NASA Discovers Water On Moon - Bottlers To Open Plants By 2013:

[ddeclue]

ZEPHYRHILLS, FL 10/9/2009: In response to today's announcement of water discovered on the moon, Zephyrhills Water has announced plans to expand production by building a new lunar bottling plant. Plans are to begin production by October of 2013 with initial production of 500,000 gallons a day expanding to 3,000,000 gallons by 2019.

The new water will be marketed under the brandname Lunawater and will retail for around $3700.00 per one liter bottle initially with prices eventually falling as production is ramped up.

Zephyhills executives made this announcement after concluding that American consumers were clearly willing to pay exorbitant prices to purchase and ship water from distant exotic locations such as the Fiji islands in the South Pacific. According to one executive who spoke on condition of anonymity: "If they are willing to pay in excess of $5.00 per liter for Fiji water, it seems to be a no brainer that they'll be willing to pay several thousand dollars per liter to try Lunawater".

Zephyrhills competitor Nestle Foods has likewise announced that it is abandoning plans to build a new bottling facility in Florida opting instead for the moon with its own competitor product "Nestle's Nu-moon Water". "We just got tired of trying to deal with all of the environmental considerations here in Florida" said one executive "when we heard that there was water on the moon we realized that we could avoid all these pesky tree huggers altogether with a lunar bottling plant - the moon has no trees and no troublesome environmental protection laws".

Nestle believes that their plant will open slightly after Zephyrhills but with an initially larger capacity of 650,00 liters per day.

[Berserker]

1. It can't get

any better than that good ol sulfer smelling shit that that some parts of Florida call water ya boy.

[ddeclue]

8. .

[DainBramaged]

2. ..............

[glowing]

3. The shame in the whole water issue is that FL makes nothing off of these companies

extracting FL water and bottling it in plastic and then selling it back to its citizens. The whole thing is wildly absurd, and if you think about it, its just un-American.

[ddeclue]

4. I know because I live in Orlando

[glowing]

9. And I live in Tampa area.. Zephyrhills isn't too far from either of us.

[pampango]

5. Now if NASA discovers oil on the moon, then we can talk. n/t

[ddeclue]

6. No that's out in the moons of the gas giants of Saturn and Jupiter.

[leveymg]

7. Sorry Zephyr, Nestle, someone already got there first. Got a lock on supplies. Proof? Here's proof

Marketed as, "MOON: The Low Gravity Water"

[femrap]

10. Jobs on the Moon!!!!

No Unions Allowed!!!