The Time Has Come to Make Glenn Beck President, Says Scary Clown Lady

[sufrommich]

http://gawker.com/5585989/the-time-has-come-to-make-glenn-beck-president-says-clown-lady


Match your lip liner to your lipstick.That's all I'm saying.

[Warpy]

1. Holy shit.

I'm not struck speechless very often, but it happened now.

There's a great description of who and what this gal is in the comments.

[sufrommich]

7. This one?.....

"She is is from the Northeast. I'll assume that she lives in a giant house with her husband and her kids are fully grown and out of the house. They never call. Her husband still works, and probably owns his own business. So her days are filled with hair appointments, massages, shopping "therapy", "actual therapy", lunch with the girls, and home to order takeout before hubby gets home himself. He will compliment her on how well she plated everything.

She got really upset when a half black guy became president and turned to the internet to find solace. She finds some like minded crazies and gets swept up in the rise of GLEN BECK. She LOVES that he can kind of say "white people are being punished by this black jerk" and she finds her savior. Rich white people are the oppressed good guys, you guys!

She demands that hubby gets her a new laptop, a new HD camera, and hires a graphic designer to make her Main St. Bites Back logo. He really overcharges her because even though the work is light, she is a nightmare client with lots of money. He has to meet her everyday at a different restaurant for like two weeks. She mostly talks on the phone.

She starts a facebook group and now, it's a whole new life. Those beauty appointments are for a REASON. She can't cook dinner for a REASON. She has found her purpose. She will fail miserably. She will be really into something else in about two years. Like Malteses or something. "



I love it.

[Warpy]

34. I think he left out one thing

She's likely a trophy wife who has had too many birthdays and who is chasing the youth her elderly husband found so attractive. He, in the meantime, is chasing youth outside the marriage, leaving her ample time to listen to Beck and play politics.

I was a country club kid. I know the type.

[DJ13]

2. She looks like one of those plastic women on "Real Housewives of Orange County"

:rofl:

[sufrommich]

6. She does! nt

[name not needed]

31. She looks like the blonde girl from Final Destination 3, post tanning bed scene.

[riverwalker]

3. mommy make her go away

Remember the purple bandaid lady from the Bush/Kerry race? Well, imagine she had a daughter, on crack, locked in a room full of cheap cosmetics, and no mirror (but more crack). 'nuff said.

[Touchdown]

28. All of my sperm has died.

I felt them die. Each one of them. They screamed out in terror and then it was silent.:cry:

[Amaril]

45. That is SOOOO wrong, but

:rofl:

[Ken Burch]

4. I'm DEFINITELY going to listen to someone whose eyes randomly bug out like that.

Especially when it comes to the question of who should be put in charge of our nuclear stockpile.

[JHB]

5. Maybe she should memorize her speech before recording...

...constantly reading off something (cue cards? teleprompter) and not looking into the camera just adds to the creepy effect.

And lady, you don't need any adding in that direction!

[Alcibiades]

17. It was a computer screen

You can see the glow in her beady little eyes.

[Th1onein]

8. This is funny!

It's got to be a comedy skit, right?

[BlueJazz]

9. It's like a saddlebag in a hat with two hot dogs for lips.

[Ikonoklast]

10. Some of the comments are priceless...!

It's like a saddlebag in a hat with two hot dogs for lips.


...and when beck is president, you'll float too!!


Tell you what lady... I'll sign your stupid petition if you promise to keep making these awesomely terrible videos. Deal?

More...

[blondeatlast]

12. Comedy gold!

Mockin' Robin (tweet!)
Mockin' Robin (Tweedly-deet!)
All the cuckoobirds on Teapot Street
Love to hear Robin go Tweet! Tweet! Tweet!

Jackson 5 cover by Insane Clown Posse

[dana_b]

49. Comedy ORANGE!!

"I'm a tolerant person and not prone to discrimination but I'm starting to realize nothing sensible has never come out of an Orange person's mouth.

Since Orange isn't an ethnicity, it's a choice I'm fine making fun of them.

Hobbes, Tony the Tiger and Chester Cheetah aren't human and don't count."
:rofl:

[madrchsod]

11. she`s selling gucci knockoffs on her site...

did you know gucci made tv guide covers?

[centerdem]

13. the biggest loser

is the guy that has to do her

[DJ13]

18. Good thing Ken is a eunuch!

:rofl:

[lonestarnot]

14. And to think I have to share air with those kind of tits.

[asdjrocky]

15. Don't laugh people.

You're looking at the next press secretary.

[Stinky The Clown]

16. That woman is as sincere as anyone can be. She also thinks she looks good.

She has every serious hope to drive traffic to her web site and to see Head Wreck as president.

There is not one bit of intentional pretense in that performance.

And that's frightening.

[myrna minx]

48. I completely agree.

:scared:

[Rex]

19. O O M M G G x 50K = Make it stop!

Now I have seen everything, let the 'great moon jump' commence!!!

[ohheckyeah]

20. I thought this was another Sarah Palin thread. n/t

[Mz Pip]

21. The Onion does videos now?

This was so funny, but it was also disturbing because this clown lady seems to be serious.

BTW whatever she paid her plastic surgeon was a total rip off. Sweetie, real faces don't look like that.

[Urban Prairie]

22. Yikes!!

What if Glenn Beck declines our invitation to be a presidential candidate in 2012?

"Consequently the petition will serve as a thank you to him for all he has done for us."

To them, she should have said.


I know that there are millions more who are just like this woman...

((((shudder))))

[davidinalameda]

23. I've seen worse make-up

:shrug:

[Warpy]

47. She looks like a drag queen

on the skids because she has no discernible talent or stage presence.

[blogslut]

24. She is pretender to the queen of crazy clown ladies

Dawna Lee Heising:

[blondeatlast]

36. Oy! I just had to Google that.

:wtf:

Where did she get that MBA--ULTA? If the dark haired woman who keeps showing up is her--what the hell was she thinking? And why is she always terrified?

[blogslut]

40. I'm obsessed with her

I don't know what the term for her kind of psychosis is - probably some classification of body dysmorphic disorder. She is apparently convinced she is unattractive. Instead of starving herself or subjecting herself to plastic surgeries, she attempts to hide her face under layers of makeup. I find it very sad:

[blondeatlast]

43. There's something tragically freaky about her. I actually feel pity.

She started off quite attractive and lord knows I'm no stranger to makeup and hair. I've had no cosmetic surgery but don't begrudge it to others (I'm considering a tattoo and more intimate piercing now that I'm divorced, to me, cosmetic surgery is equivalent).

There's something that went awry with her, it seems. She's got an MBA and a Ph.D, very, very attractive before all the work--I want to know what compels her? I knew an anorexic once and she told me that when she looked in the mirror she actually saw fat on herself; it must be something like that--but how on earth does one's LITERAL self-image get distorted like that?

Holy crap, I think I may share your obsession now. Thanks a lot! (I'll do my best to keep it in check, though) ;)

[Ozymanithrax]

25. Is that Tammy Faye Bakker dug up from her grave to call Beck to run? n/t

[Touchdown]

26. Is Orange a race? Can I talk about her being a cross between Tony The Tiger and Tropicana Twister?

... Or am I a racist?

[Hannah Bell]

27. her eyes -- she looks like she's high. speed or meth or something like that.

[Lucian]

29. She's creepier than Heath Ledger's portrayal of The Joker.

:scared:

[Touchdown]

30. But thinks she's sexy like his gay cowboy.

[Touchdown]

32. According to Huff Post,her name 'Potwora' is Polish for 'Monster'

:rofl:

[opihimoimoi]

33. If Beck allows this to continue....he would be DOOMED in a BEST AD CONTEST

AS SUCH...DOOMED IN THE CREDIBLE DEPT

da poor thing...

is this the best them GOPers got??

[bullwinkle428]

35. Who decided Boehner's groupies deserved access to the media?

[newspeak]

38. so, she must also believe every sacred word that comes out of the Beckster's

mouth. Everyone knows that the Germans attacked Pearl Harbor, and Obama is like Hitler, and those poor banks, sniff, sniff--"first they came for the banks." Well, if the Beckster ever runs for president and we have enough stupid people in this country to vote for him, I'd say we better all get our passports ready.

[Fleshdancer]

37. hilarious response in the comments:

Please, lady, we can only hope. Just think about the possibilities come debate night. You have Palin, Beck, Huckabee, Tancredo, Armey, Bachmann, Mittens, and three or four crazies to be named later. All you need is a sharpshooter with a dart gun and an industrial sized vat of thorazine and you all but wipe out mental illness in America.

Roslyn Carter would be proud.

:rofl:

[agent46]

39. David Lynch? n/t

[alfredo]

41. my eyes are bleeding

[Seneca]

42. I am laughing my ass off

But at the same time... :scared:

[Matariki]

44. Oh come on, that is clearly a guy.

The new thing in 'drag' this year is batshit crazy republican lady. It's all the rage.

[Canuckistanian]

46. She has porn star level acting skills

But I couldn't stop staring at those extremely large lips. They seemed to be a life form on their own.

[Ruby the Liberal]

50. I'll volunteer for the lipliner intervention, but someone stronger than me will have to

address the eyebrows. I think the eyeliner is a lost cause, sadly.

[sufrommich]

51. I feat the eyebrows have a life of their own and are slowly

lining up to jump when the opportunity rises.

[Ruby the Liberal]

52. I just watched that again with your comment in mind.

Almost pee'd myself with the visual.

:toast:

[Touchdown]

53. Kicking for the horror! Don't... Look... Now!