Ladies/Gents... Have You Been Sexually Harrased @ Work?

[otohara]

Poll question: Ladies/Gents... Have You Been Sexually Harrased @ Work?

I was a few times - The worse though, was married guy who treated me with extreme hostility when I turned down his advances. When he'd come to town to make the rounds, I was allowed to leave while he was at our offices. Still, my male boss chuckled and even questioned if I was imagining "things"!!!!!

[adigal]

1. No, but I have had male bosses who hate women n/t

[jtown1123]

96. I had a male boss say Katie Couric shouldn't be an anchor. Thinks it's better to hear

major news that we're going to war from a man. Total misogynist.

[Lance_Boyle]

97. Funny, I've had female bosses who hate men n/t

[no_hypocrisy]

2. No, but my ex-boss screamed at me and then hit me on the arm.

That was bad enough.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

3. Yes, though not recently.

My current workplace doesn't have that kind of atmosphere at all (though the lack of harassment might also have something to do with the fact that I'm old and homely). There was a time, though... I had one boss (early '80s) who would deliberately say the most gross, sleazy things and tell really dirty jokes, just to see how the women would react. He was a pig.

[otohara]

6. Once The Hormones Shut Down

I hear ya!

[s-cubed]

4. Most people don't realize it, but one person can literally harass

hundreds of people over years. When I worked for one large company, we did a survey of the women. One guy was so bad, that he could not be in a room alone with a woman, Today,he'd be fired, but then there was the work around.
I think Cain victims will start coming out: rarely does someone harass just one or two people. Usually there is a pattern.

[Initech]

5. I'm not a woman but I've had a boss and supervisor who've treated me with extreme hostility.

I've been researching what it would take to launch a formal complaint. But I'm not sure what good that would do.

[csziggy]

7. Yes, during the interview for the job

The potential boss asked about my dating habits, then hit on me, offered me some of his booze, and kept hitting on me. I told him I didn't date older men - he was at least twice my age. I might have thought he was putting on an act to check out if I was easy, but when I left the secretary asked me if he had made a date with me!

I did get the job and every so often the boss would make comments. But my supervisor was female and my desk was out in the middle of a big open room full of other people's desks so he had little chance to hit on me.

[seabeyond]

11. yup, forgot about that one. maybe more than one, but thinking one specifically

and i was desperate for a job. i couldnt talk myself into going into work.

[csziggy]

40. I needed the job bad and the pay and benefits were OK

For back then (mid1970s). I made ten cents over minimum wage as a Clerk II; Clerk I made five cents less than minimum wage. I was promised a 6% raise (about ten cents raise) at the end of each six months if my reviews were good. My reviews were excellent but that was the first time in history the state of Florida did not give merit increases as promised.

By the end of the year I was having to borrow money from my parents to make ends meet. They offered to give me nearly as much for living expenses and pay school expenses if I went back to college. Being no fool, I took them up on it. In a week, I applied, got accepted, found out what classes I needed to finish my BS, and turned in my notice.

[shanti]

8. once

around 1991. i believe this was before sexual harassment training became widespread. it was the office mail guy making his rounds. he was creepy and liked to leer at women in the office.

[Demonaut]

9. friggen sexist question!!

I have and I'm male

[otohara]

16. Sorry - I Edited to Include

men too!

my bad

[seabeyond]

10. i use to have to walk service calls into the vending dept. they had porn calendar of womens legs

spread up on wall. three more dorky, goofy, yukky men i had yet to meet. day in and out i would go in there ( was very young) and be creeped out with crude jokes, comments and insinuations and pictures.

months later it dawned on me how uncomfortable it was. i finally said something to the boss. he immediately went in and pulled down the calendar and had a conversation with the men. the boss just had never thought about it. hadnt even entered his head. as soon as it was mentioned, was a duh....

i always had good male managers and they did well ensuring we had a comfortable work environment.

even younger, i got a management position and when i asked for same wage as the man that got the same position, i was told no, he was supporting a family, i didnt need it. wasnt sexual harassment.

[southernyankeebelle]

12. I was the only female in a room full of guys. They were all military and

I must say they would get vuglar once in awhile and forget I was there and turn around a say "oh sorry".

[laundry_queen]

13. In the early '90s

The most disgusting thing is I was 14. No, wait, the most disgusting thing was I told my parents and they did nothing. I was working as a busgirl/waitress and this one cook would constantly harrass me, asking me if I had a boyfriend, saying how hot I looked, smacking my behind, putting his arm around me. He was quite a bit older than me and married. His brother owned the place and never told him to knock it off. I quit when they had me waitressing the whole place by myself at 15 on some shifts. Horrible workplace.

[justabob]

20. I missed your post

That is pretty much my story (Including massive station size), except I was older.... 24.

[MrsBrady]

14. a few creepy guys, but lucky enough to have not been hit on

or groped....

however, in college, some guy touched my ass while on the stairs, on my way up to my dorm room.

i turned around and told him if he ever touched me again I would push him down the stairs. he
just kind of stood there and looked at me...and I went on my way.


off topic
one time I thought my friend was next to me at a bar (he had gotten up and I didn't see him get up,
he was to my left and the music was to my right)...and I put my hand on his leg, thinking it was him.
I turned to look and it wasn't him!!!!! - and the guy had not said anything!!!!!!! lol
I was embarrassed, but the guy didn't seem to mind LOL and also ick.

[TBF]

15. I had one I remember who was particularly sexist - assigned women to less desirable tasks etc... -

It was a part-time job for me and I left - turned out a couple years later he was fired for making advances to young boys (it was a hospital we worked in).

[Horse with no Name]

17. I had one ask me to give him a blow job

I said sure...but I had to warn him that I liked to bite.:D

Said blow job was never mentioned again. He knew I was serious.

On edit: this was in the mid-80's...this went on everywhere then.

[redqueen]

61. One of the worst incidents I remember...

this guy just walked up next to me in my cubicle, put one foot up on my chair and whipped it out... expecting what that guy asked of you. I was just speechless... I can't remember if I tried to laugh it off or if he just left after a moment but it was absolutely horrible.

Most of the time it was just disturbing or disgusting or just rude/nasty words... but when it was more... ugh.

I actually did say something to my supervisor after that one... that was the end of that temp assignment.

[justabob]

18. yes

I reported it to my manager. He was nice about it, but basically told me there was nothing he could do. The guy doing the harassing had numerous issues prior to my run in with him, but he was great in the kitchen, hard to replace. It got so bad I couldn't even enter the kitchen to pick up the food for my tables. Since I was a waitress that would run all hot food, not just my own, customers were suffering. Eventually they put him deeper in the kitchen, rather than in front as expo, and apparently threatened him with dismissal or something because it got better for all the waitresses. It really sucked for a while.

[stevedeshazer]

19. Yes, I have a few times.

It was unwanted. Yes, I'm a straight guy.

[pnwmom]

25. My brother was, too.

He is straight and the supervisor who came onto him clearly wasn't. My brother quit the job. "Sexual harassment" wasn't even spoken about in those days.

[stevedeshazer]

26. It wasn't just men, although that happened too.

I was a supervisor, was hit on by both sides a few times.

[pnwmom]

27. Sounds like a really fun workplace.

:sarcasm:

[stevedeshazer]

28. It was a bank.

Call center. Stuff was happening everywhere. We drove HR crazy.

[Raine]

21. I worked for a woman but one day they called in a plumber

and he kept "bumping" into me. I would move but he still "bumped" me no matter how much or where I moved he found a way to rub up against my backside. :puke: I'm sorry now that I didn't just holler loudly "back off, watch it" or something. I was young and naive, I couldn't leave because I was "holding down the fort".

[TorchTheWitch]

22. many many times

Even in several job interviews.

[Mimosa]

23. I was extremely goodlooking when young and never was harassed on a job.

I'm a bi/LGBT woman. I was a hottie until my 40s. And no straight guys ever crossed the 'sexual harassment' line. That I was able to work various jobs without sexual harassment made me appreciate men. I had been sexually 'approached' and diddled but not raped by adult men when I was pre-pubescent.

[RebelOne]

32. I was also extremely good-looking in my 20s and 30s.

And I had many problems with being sexually harassed. But that was back in the 60s and 70s before women could bring law suits against sexual predators.

[Mimosa]

63. I got ripped off money wise but never sexually harassed.

Odd.

things can flow differently. *shrug*

[treestar]

86. Being good looking may not be the issue

Harassers are controlling people, remember, and they will harass the homely and say no one will believe you. The less attractive are often the target for that reason.

[freeplessinseattle]

79. Do you think a woman is to blame for her own rape

if she dresses sexily?

Like rape, harassment is often about power rather than looks. Even elderly women get raped. Plus it is easier for the perpetrators to brush it off if accused, "why would anyone want her?" "She should be flattered".

I've known a couple of plain (and older) women who were sexually harassed on the job, and it is just as devastating-they weren't flattered at all, just upset and felt trapped and frustrated.

In 2 of my own retail jobs back in the day there have been instances of astoundingly blatant and offensive harassment, by men who were just generally dickish in nature, and liked the power they held over me.

One guy made lewd and other inappropriate remarks while simultaneously putting down my college studies, saying he got a degree (in business, maybe that was the problem) and look where he is now. He would assign me to men's shoes and said I sell more wearing a short dress, and (with envy, probably) told me my looks gave me an advantage to selling, so why bother with my brain when I could aspire to store manager like him?

[seabeyond]

81. no, i doesnt have to do with looks. it is about putting woman in their place and dominance. nt

[Mimosa]

91. Heck, NO. Does anybody? n/t

[freeplessinseattle]

93. Yes. Many do. n/t

[pnwmom]

24. Yes. I was in my early 20's and he was probably 50.

Every time I had to bring him something, he'd make comments about how I must be craving his body. I was so repulsed. This was pre-Anita Hill -- I had never even heard of the term "sexual harassment," so I felt all alone in this. I finally asked a male co-worker to deliver things for me so I didn't have to interact with this guy. Eventually, I got promoted and my new boss was the head of the company. I told him what the harrasser would do and he told me that other women in another department had recently complained about him, too. Soon afterwards, the harrasser's V.P. read him the riot act -- and he learned to shut his slimy mouth.

[Xithras]

29. Sort of.

Back in the 90's I was hired for a creative programming position by an obviously out and gay manager at a 50-person startup. During the interview, he asked me some questions about some of the work they were doing (they were putting together an online clothes modeling system that could be subbed out to designers), and made a comment about the ass on one of the male models, and about how he looked like he'd be "fun". I made a smartass remark, which apparently (unintentionally) convinced the manager that I was gay. I'm not...I'm bisexual, and have been since I was a teenager.

I was hired on a three month "contract-to-hire" agreement. Two months into the contract, I was talking to the manager about a scheduling issue when I mentioned my girlfriend. The manager got a shocked look on his face and said, "Girlfriend? I thought you were gay!". I answered him that I'd never claimed to be gay, but that I was bisexual. He responded with, "Oh, so you are gay, but just won't admit it. Whatever. Live your little lie."

After that, he was very cold, distant, and formal with me. A couple of weeks later I was informed that I wasn't getting into the perm position, and that my contract wouldn't be extended. They declined to tell me why, and simply stated that they had "re-evaluated the need to staff this position". Before leaving, I learned that this was their generic answer when they didn't want to hire anyone.

The only reason that I say "sort-of" is that the guy never actually hit on me, made any sort of pass or inappropriate comment, or did anything else that even remotely resembled discrimination. There was no indication that he was actually interested in me at all. Still, his behavior after learning the truth about my sexuality suggests that SOMETHING was going on inside his head.

Not that I cared all that much. They were an early FuckedCompany listing not too long afterward.

[redqueen]

30. Many times.

Somehow I got the idea that if you weren't being literally chased around the desk that it was 'just how men are' so you just had to expect and deal with it.

[spiderpig]

34. Me too.

Can't tell you how many times my 40+ bosses would reach around me pretending to look for something in my center desk drawer and just happen to grapple my 20-year-old breasts.

This was in the 70s, and my own mother shrugged it off saying "He's just being a man."

Ugh.

It happened, folks. A lot. Before women finally got the power in numbers to call these creeps out on their actions.

Pervs.

[Skittles]

31. yes, in the military

the guy ceased when I broke his teeth with a giant stapler; yes INDEED

[kiranon]

47. Yes, also in the military. n/t

[flvegan]

33. Yes.

But I'm in the minority, as I loved it.

[LeftyMom]

42. Then it's not harassment.

It may be inappropriate or a violation of company policy, but it's not harassment if it's not unwelcome or exploitative, by definition.

PS Do I need to cut some bitches? ;)

[flvegan]

43. What makes you think

it was just women?

[LeftyMom]

45. What makes you think I meant it in a gender-specific way?

I'm not discriminatory in my possessiveness. :D

[flvegan]

50. Because why

would you need to cut a/some delightful fellas who make me smile with their flattery and desire to rub my shoulders? I like to have my shoulders rubbed.

[seabeyond]

52. bah hahahaha

really

this is fun

[flvegan]

54. What?

[LeftyMom]

53. For the same reason you don't let anybody else drive your car.

Those shoulders are lovely and they're mine and if they'd like a delightful set to drool over I do believe there are a great many internet sites which can make that happen. Also, because I'm a jealous bitch.

[flvegan]

55. You're just mean.

[LeftyMom]

58. That too. nt

[flvegan]

59. Henceforth

I shant tell you of my very nice gentlemen friends. They don't need your rage.

Hmph.

[freeplessinseattle]

85. hmm, wonder if Merkel liked W rubbing her shoulders

but judging from her reaction I doubt it. Can feel pretty violating to a lot of people.

Lesson is, one should never assume and err on the conservative, (so to speak)

[nolabear]

35. I once had a boss come on to me while I was crying over the news of a friend's death.

So help me God. You know, "comforting." And no, there was no doubt. He was explicit. Interestingly, when I worked animal rehab I was constantly in the middle of Southern good-old-boy sexual inuendo and never felt threatened. I think it was because I was an honorary fella. At the time many animal caretakers came off the farm and they didn't have a category for me. I pretty much let it ride, since I WAS the boss. :evilgrin:

[BlueIris]

80. Yikes.

Cree-pee.

[kcass1954]

36. Yes, but not by an employee - a customer - lots of comments filled with sexual innuendo.

Three years ago, and it ended quite abruptly one day when I decided I'd had it.

Me: You - Me - Outside right now!

Him: I'm not going outside.

Me: Fine. Then we have have this discussion right here, in front of God and everybody. Your choice.

So, we walk outside.

Me: You will NEVER speak to me like that again.

Him: I don't know what you're talking about.

Me: You know exactly what I'm talking about, and I'm done with your little comments. Here's how it's going down. You will NEVER speak to me like that again. If you do, I go to my boss, I go to HR, I go to my attorney. Are we clear?

He's still there as a customer, but he barely looks my way.

[erinlough]

83. That's the way I did it

Loud and threatening, and I meant it. One boss said he would "do" me, I told him I wouldn't "do" him if he were the only man on earth. End of the innuendo. I don't play around with that stuff and I guess people can tell. I wouldn't hesitate to say it infront of the whole staff.

[Faithful One]

37. Does this count?

I met this girl in my psychology class. She seemed nice so I added her on FaceBook, started talking to her, etc.

Then she got weird. She started asking me if I wanted to have sex, and manages to work it into almost every conversation we have. While she is an attractive woman - I'm really not interested. But she constantly pesters me about it and other topic.s

[HipChick]

38. yes...a guy tried to grab and man-handled

my female parts...

I knee'd him in the gonads...I was young, and naive...in post-reflection, I should have filed a claim, and picked up a multi-million dollar settlement...

[bullwinkle428]

39. Never happened to me, but I sure witnessed a shit load of harassment

doled out by one particular asshole with whom I worked, several years back. I certainly let the shitbag know how I felt about it, and he responded to my criticism by attacking me in totally passive-aggressive ways. For example, stealing samples that I had been working on (R&D laboratory), and splattering the floor around a specific work station of mine with some sticky liquid to make life a little more difficult for me.

Needless to say, he ended up getting FIRED as the result of this constant harassment of women in the department! Funny how all the passive-aggressive attacks went away after that!

[LeftyMom]

41. All the damned time.

*sigh*

[flvegan]

44. LOL!

I ain't sayin' nothing.

:rofl:

[LeftyMom]

46. Not THEM.

I find that HILARIOUS. :rofl: It's the skeevy old dudes that I wish would stop hitting on me.

[flvegan]

48. In my mind and fantasies...

your reply never happened.

Sigh.

[likesmountains 52]

49. I used to transcribe medical records in the evening, in a multi MD office

one evening (alone in the office) one of the docs came in to see "what I was doing" and rubbed his crotch up and down the back of my chair while I was typing. I quickly gathered my purse etc. and left. It was very creepy.

[Faux pas]

51. Yep had two bosses who looked at single moms as

easy pickings. It was back in the day before it was illegal.

[Liquorice]

56. Yes a few times. The worst was when

I was 19 and working at the college that I was also attending. I answered calls on an internal phone line (it was only calls from other areas of the campus). So one day a man disguising his voice called and said he wanted to "eat my pu**y." I hung up. Later the campus police came by and I told them about the call. They thought it was funny because they said guys see a "pretty girl walking in here every day and get all excited." They both had this nasty little smile on their faces when they said it. That really made me mad, but I didn't know what to do about it.

Then the dirty pervert caller man started calling more often, and saying various dirty things. The campus cops said I should just hang up on him whenever he called. They acted like I was bothering them and causing trouble by reporting the calls. At this point, I was getting super anxious about answering the phone and having severe dread about going to work. I finally quit, even though the job was tied to my financial aid benefits.

It still makes me furious when I think about it.

[proud2BlibKansan]

57. I worked in a bar

My DH's band was the house band. One night I was bussing a table right in front of the stage. When I leaned over to pick up empty glasses, one of the guys sitting there grabbed my breast and twisted it. I slapped him and within seconds, the entire band had left the stage and was beating the shit out of the guy who had grabbed me.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

60. I was working at the court house as a court reporter.

I was staying late working on the jury charge with the assistant District Attorney.

He backed me into a corner and whipped it out at me, and I was terrified.

He committed indecent exposure. He acted like a four year old showing off his favorite toy.
I should have gone to the D.A.'s office and filed criminal charges against him.

[Gamow]

62. I'm self employed

so... YES!

[davsand]

64. In some ways a hostile environment was almost worse than outright sexual come-ons

I've seen both kinds in my life, and in my experience it took a much larger toll on me to deal every day with the anger and outright hostility than it did to get groped or grabbed. NEITHER scenario is a good one, but I still have residual issues (years later) after my experience in a hostile workplace. I feared for my physical safety along with my ability to earn an income, and for me that was just a debilitating experience. The guy that grabbed my ass or rubbed up on me, I elbowed in the gut or stomped on and kept on working. Somehow, being able to respond--take back some minimal control--made it a bit less traumatic for me.

Seems to me like there are a lot of seriously fucked up people out there in the workplace and I have to wonder just what it is in our society that makes anyone think they can act out like they do.

YMMV.




Laura

[Initech]

84. I hear ya - hostile work environments are never fun.

I'm currently in one - since my boss put me in a horrible position last year, and dealing with an extremely controlling and obnoxious supervisor hasn't been fun in the slightest. And every time I complain, my boss only maybe slightly seems to care and kind of does something about it but things haven't changed much. And the powers that be don't seem to get how miserable this environment is. I'm looking at ways to go to the department of labor and tell them what's been going on but I think that would only make things worse than they are right now.

[Withywindle]

65. Yeah, several times.

The last one was just last year. I had a co-worker who waited until AFTER work (evening shift) to approach me at the bus stop in the dark and make his gross comments. He was fired, thank the gods. He was scary in other ways too - unfortunately, I don't think the sexual harassment alone would have been enough for my boss to get rid of him.

[bigwillq]

66. No (nt)

[akbacchus_BC]

67. I voted no, that shit does not happen where I work.

[XemaSab]

68. Not at work

At my apartment, which was even creepier.

[Sen. Walter Sobchak]

69. Really just a few who wouldn't take no for an answer, but one got really creepy

Only a handful of the people I work with have met my girlfriend so I guess I am just assumed to be available, it doesn't really bother me in the office where no one will do anything too offensive there are a couple of women I dred traveling with since that is when they seem to get their courage up. The woman who hired me warned me I would be working with a bunch of ticking biological clocks and cougars released from captivity. It doesn't bother me so much as I just find it awkward since I have to deal with them on an ongoing basis.

The one instance that really, really bothered me was a woman and her "friend" who was Basic Instict creepy and did things that easily could have set me up to be fired and just generally terrified me. The woman was just all round fucked in the head and just got off on playing twisted games on people with her partner. She came after me because she felt my girlfriend at the time had deliberately professionally embarrassed her, so she was going to get revenge by bagging me and making a scandal of it.

[Liquorice]

72. Cougars released from captivity? Do you work at a zoo? nt

[Sen. Walter Sobchak]

73. Those weren't my words, just a warning when I was being interviewed

[Liquorice]

92. IF a prospective interviewer said that, she should be fired. nt

[saras]

70. And now, the lighter side: I have, but not seriously

Way back in the early eighties, a few really fruity guys I knew would blatantly come on to straight guys that they knew were okay with it, in order to mess with the heads of other straight guys (usually). How could I resist? Especially good when my response was to say "let me think about it", and then stand there thinking.

I read this thread and I feel so goddamn lucky I could cry. One of the few areas where privilege really paid off for me.

[Cerebral Assassin]

71. No I haven't

I never have. Although a couple of years back, I worked for this woman who was hot enough that I wouldn't have minded if she had.

[davsand]

94. I have heard other men joke in that way. The reality is often different.

Yours seems like a typical "guy" response, except for the fact that when you are in that situation,there is a power imbalance at work that really messes with the whole fantasy of some powerful woman being hot for you. Men I have known who were actually IN that situation suffered a great deal--including physical illness and emotional trauma. Many victims of a hostile workplaces suffer with issues like depression or even PTSD.

I am glad for you that you have not faced it at this point in your life. Good luck to you!



Laura

[MrSlayer]

74. No. I work in construction, it's 90% guys.

So I haven't really even had the opportunity to be harassed.

[DirkGently]

75. These stories are horrific. I had thought Mr. Cain's "sex scandal" was not the most

important standard to judge him on, given his overall lack of knowledge and human compassion, but maybe not. If he has the kind of psychotic contempt for women people are relating here, I think that's about all anyone needs to know.

[seabeyond]

76. i am glad you read so many stories and was up to being open about the issue

it really is not a little thing. it really is not a "funny" either, like so many seem to feel. too many women live with this in their life, making a work environment hard to be in.

[DirkGently]

77. I never questioned the seriousness of the issue. But political "sex scandals" vary in their

relevance. Infidelity is one issue. Homophobes unmasked as gay is something else. Sexual harassment speaks to character in a way that is never irrelevant or unimportant. There is so much wrong with Herman Cain that I couldn't but a sigh a little hearing that he had "sex scandals." But to the extent he is a harasser of women, it needs to be called out and examined.

[freeplessinseattle]

87. Absolutely. Not having a "sense of humor" has nothing to do

with anything. That Republican brand of "humor" often is much more mean than "funny", as is sexual harassment (and yes, the intent and effect can be mean even when complimentary)

[Brooklyns_Finest]

78. You know what?

My former boss (and friend) is a Lesbian who has had numerous experience with men before she turned gay (her words). In any case, she found me attractive and several times she would rub my shoulder and always compliment me on my clothing. It really didnt bother me too much because we are friends, but it was kind of weird. Also, we once went out to happy hour together and I asked her if there was anyone in the office she would hook up with. She was kind of drunk at the time and said that she would make out with me. I didn't know what to think of that and I certainly never mentioned it again. She was the manager of the office and I was the only other supervisor so we got to be tight really quickly.

I'm kind of a hot dude, so I also have to deal with my subordinate employees making inappropriate comments. One employee called me her sexy supervisor. Another one came up to me early in the morning when it was just me and her in the office and said (two inches from my face) "if you weren't my supervisor, I would hook you up with my sister". I have more stories, but I'll just stop there. I work for an agency that is 70% women, and I am an early 30's single dude. I don't know, I guess they see in me what they want from the guys they date.

[salin]

82. I didn't vote - b/c I didn't want to mix my vote up with the more serious harassment

a couple of times in the 80s - by male peers I had to suffer through loutish, lascivious comments - that were quickly tamped out by the social reaction (they were in public and others, like myself, who heard were like "wtf" and the moment passed.)

Once in the 90s a subordinate made a really inappropriate pass - but again a different situation given I was in a subordinate position and after one quick moment made it clear that I was appalled and there was no recurrence.

I would say I experienced inappropriate behavior in the work place, but not harassment. In the first situation it was quashed by the social reaction of my colleagues and never recurred. In the latter situation the power dynamics were switched - and the person making the advance had more to risk by doing so and the behavior never happened again. Though had the power relationship been different (if he had been my subordinate), it very well could have turned into a harassing situation.

[seabeyond]

89. "quickly tamped out by the social reaction" " quashed by the social reaction of my colleagues "

this is the thing. i always worked in environments where the majority of MEN would not allow that behavior to females and the male bosses worked hard to create a good environment for all employees. there was no foolin around with this. i value and appreciate those experiences. that is what is needed and that is why it is so bad when the boss behaves this way. he is not on female side and condones the behavior for all men to see, it is acceptable. i have never worked in an environment where it was condoned, even thru action.

[Missy Vixen]

88. I worked for Godfather's Pizza shortly after I left college

I had a supervisor who could not keep his hands off me and other female employees. He thought it was "cute" and "funny". I told him multiple times to leave me alone, do not touch me, do not rub against me, make sexually-oriented comments, etcetera. Did I mention he was married?

The five women affected called a local attorney referral service. The guy wrote one letter to the company on our behalf, and all hell broke loose. We didn't end up with a cent, but Mr. Hands ended up transferred to another location, we got a formal apology from the district manager, bla bla bla. This was directly after he told us "You girls are taking this much too seriously," and I said, "The attorney we just talked to says differently."

I realize my experience is tame compared to other women's, but I'll never forget the dread I felt whenever I had to work a shift with Mr. Hands present, and how helpless I felt when I told him to leave me alone, and he laughed in my face.

[seabeyond]

90. who the fuck is anyone to touch you when you dont want them to? why would anyone feel it is ok?

i say

as i am a toucher, lol. and i touch everyone. but on the arm and is never sexual. hmmmm. maybe i am gonna have to control that.

interesting.

[rjj621]

99. Better watch that

Some people will even claim a touch on the arm is sexual.

[Romulox]

95. Yes. nt

[slackmaster]

98. No, but I have experienced age discrimination

:argh:

[Blue_In_AK]

100. My first job out of college in 1968

doing clerical work for a couple of petroleum geologists in Denver. The one guy (he was in his 40s) used to sneak up behind me all the time and try to kiss my neck. On more than one occasion, he literally chased me around my desk. Once the two of them took me to lunch -- at the topless bar across the street (I didn't realize that's what it was), which embarrassed me terribly at my tender young age. I'd never seen anything like that.

This was before the laws, so I quit shortly and got another job.

I had another boss, a lawyer, in the late '70s and early '80s, who used to call me "baby" all the time, but he wasn't slimy about it, just kind of old school, so I let him off the hook. It was part of his very unique personality.