Been posting here 6 years. 30k posts now. And 6 yrs ago tonight my life changed

[The Straight Story]

At 2:16 am 6 years ago my mom passed away. Since that day my life has changed in ways I could never have imagined.

Through it all my friends on DU have been there for me.

From kind words, phone calls, help when I was down - no matter how much we did not agree on threads the folks I met here were there when I most needed them.

In a short time I lost several neighbors, then mom, then mom's best friend we called mom #2, then my x wife and I finally got to talk to my kids whom I had not spoken with for 8 years and did not know where they were. Then my 2nd X's health problems (parkinson's, etc), my own problems, etc.

Time after time, through all of these years, I found friends here to talk me through it all. Most all of my friends, the ones I grew up with, have died, and I felt really alone. But folks on DU took me in. It's not just a website, it is a community. It is made up of real people - people who care, people who really do give a damn about each other.

Folks here took me in. We argue, we disagree, but when I most needed someone to talk to or rant to you were here for me. I can rip someone on one thread, and they me on another, but we never forget that we are all real people, with real lives, and real problems - when the chips are down we put aside our differences and help each other.

I remember walking into that hospital room and seeing my mom laying there, like she was sleeping and my sister telling me and my brother that mom had taken her last breath a few minutes ago. My brother fell to his knees and wept, holding mom's hand. I just stood there in shock.

6 years ago I said hello to DU, and 6 years ago I also said goodbye to my mom and so many others. DU has been there to support me, and so many others who are going through rough times. Argue, complain, call each other names, etc - but in the end folks here always seem to come together for each other. Call it what you will, but back where I come from we called that family.

So thanks to you all, and to Skinner and his evil cohorts for putting up with me and my issues over the years.

If I were to sum up some of my life, it would be in my videos:

For Mom:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oGOq-M1dFHw

For those I have know over the years (and for my one daughter who does not yet know who I am but that I watch grow up from afar):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4P9zLjc0tw

For my first X, who died July 4th, 2005:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ODts5_v2O_I

For my little girl, I wish - well I wish your mom had not gotten ill and things had not turned out how they did:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_iu5yeDM5Lk

And for DU and Andy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-10_iPus9g

[Lifelong Protester]

1. I am sorry for your loss. My mom left us 20 years ago. Still hurts.

And you remember kindly the folks who were sympathetic and helped you through it. I know.

[givemebackmycountry]

2. Straight - Thanks.

My Mom is 79 and she's two hours away, and I was just down there for Christmas for three days.
I just got off the phone with her and she asked me if I had off tomorrow (I do) and if I was coming down for New Years.
I had a tough week at work, I'm burned out, and I really don't feel like driving anywhere on New Years Eve.
After reading your post, I think I shall wake up early in the morning and make the drive.

Thanks.

I've always admired you, and this is one of the many reasons why.

[The Straight Story]

6. Make the drive

I watched my mom languish for 2 months in the hospital. Then she came home the week before Christmas, then on Christmas eve she went back in the hospital and died a week later.

I was planning on going to California with the X to spend Christmas with her family, but I stayed home because mom was going to come home.

I won't ever regret making the choice to stay here. We had a snowstorm, ice everywhere, power was out. I sat alone with my dog boiling water to stay warm and a hand crank radio. I could have been out in Sunny CA with my X, daughter, and in-laws - but then I would have missed seeing mom at home one last time, would have not seen her...that last night I saw her alive :( it is still a night I cannot talk about without crying but she showed me a strength that carries me through my toughest times now.

[givemebackmycountry]

9. I will my friend, I will.

:pals:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

3. My dear Straight Story...

What a great song: "I'm Already There." I had goosebumps and tears...

And you know I'm here for you, and I have been, and I always will be...

You have such a great heart...

:hug:

[The Straight Story]

4. That video I made long before I knew my son was going to Iraq

Long before I had heard his voice after 8 years of hoping to see him again.

Suddenly he was there again in my life, and now he is off to war. Bush's war that is, for some reason, still going on...

[CaliforniaPeggy]

5. It's an excellent video, sweetie...

I gave it a thumbs-up.

Wars are so horrible. I hope your son will be home soon...

:hug:

[dixiegrrrrl]

7. My heart hears your words.

[MrMickeysMom]

8. Thanks for allowing me a glimpse...

I think I got to know you a bit. That was so kind of you.

All of us have DU as a thread, I think we like this place because there are more important threads within it - It's what happens when a person allows others to see who they love and be able to imagine from there WHY they are so well loved and valued.

I'll think of your son tonight and into the new year.

Be well, SS....

MMM

[Odin2005]

10. (((HUGS))) & rec.

:hug:

[pinboy3niner]

11. Our thoughts are with you

Anniversary dates of loss are tough enough without also having the burden of worry and concern for a son in a combat zone far away.

I admire your ability to express your feelings, and to reach out--something I've never been good at, even when overwhelmed by loss. But when I forced myself to open up and reach out when I faced a recent loss, it was only the love and support of brother and sister DUers that enabled me to face it and got me through it.

My thoughts are with you at this difficult time, and with your son.

Love & Peace,
pinboy3niner

[rhett o rick]

12. Glad you are in DU. nm

[aikoaiko]

13. Such hard losses for you.

Thoughts and prayers to you and yours.

[roguevalley]

14. I came here when my mother and dad died and it was so

helpful. Take care. You deserve the good now.

[hermetic]

15. To one

whose face (avatar) I've seen almost every day for the last 6 years, even though I don't say much, I wish you a most happy and prosperous New Year!. And here's a hug, too. :hug:

[DesertDiamond]

16. Straight Story, you have so warmed my heart today! Although I'm not one of the one's you've....

dialogued with, I feel so good knowing you found a warm community here at DU. A big cyberhug to you!!! I lost my own mom in 1992, and it was such a shock to realize I never ever thought there would be a day when she wouldn't be there to hug. But now I realize she is with me all the time, and I feel her here. I hope you can feel your mom is there with you, because she is.

Straight Story, you have wonderful heart. I am so glad you are here with us on DU. I send you a hug that lasts forever!

[JDPriestly]

17. The Straight Story, Thanks for your support and love on DU.

[TatonkaJames]

18. Your Story

The Straight Story -
I'll not comment on our families tragedies so as not to take away from your story, so I wish you Peace in your heart
and strength in your will to move forward while keeping beautiful memories of your loved ones.
Smile, each time you do is a tribute to your mom and the Universe will make sure she sees you.
Peace my friend

[Hell Hath No Fury]

19. I remember all those events --

and am so glad that you found the comfort you needed here from your fellow DUers. :hug: :grouphug:

[tpsbmam]

20. Oh wow, SS, you gave me chills.

I forgot that I came to DU after my best friend died in 2006. I was at such a loss without her -- we used to talk for HOURS every single day and had done so for many years. She came to me when she finally hit rock bottom with her drug use. I took her to her first NA meeting and it took -- she went home after staying with me for a bit and got started on her new wonderful life. Until the night she slipped, "went out," and it fucking killed her. (She'd done tremendous damage to her heart by then and unbeknownst to any of us, had a severely damaged heart.) Seriously didn't know if I was going to recover from that one. Mom had died 2 years previously, another good friend had died not long after Mom & then my best, best, best, best friend.

Wow. I'd forgotten that I came to DU partly because I was so lost without my friend ranting about the "fucking Republicans." It just came flooding back when you related your own history here.

So happy you found such a wealth of friendship here. Wonderful videos -- "Already There" got me.

I hope this anniversary leaves you with warm, wonderful, funny & mostly happy memories. I know the anniversaries can be really difficult.


:cry: :grouphug:

[Ken Burch]

21. Damn, you've been through a lot.

Don't know what to say to all that except...I'm glad this site has given you some small comfort through all that pain.

[Dirigo]

22. This time of season always pull at heartstrings

It has been said earlier that Straight Story has a tremendous heart and I echo the same sentiments. It is wonderful that good and honorable people come home to the democratic party to make sense of the bumps on the road of life. Straight Story is stronger for his honesty and sharing his lifes story. It is something not easily done by many. This time of year always evokes pain and suffering in everyones lives. The Christmas Season can be a time of great joy and the pits of hell and despair for those who have suffered gut wrenching traumatic episodes. My wish for Straight Story is to find peace and happiness again and to continue to spread his good will and intellect on Democratic Underground for the betterment of the DU community. He is a Democrat that deserves a snappy Salute!

[niyad]

23. k and r--was thinking about your loss earlier today. know that your DU family is always here for

you

[malaise]

24. Here's a hug

for a great DUer :grouphug:

[BrklynLiberal]

25. A straightforward, and incredibly touching and eloquent post.

Thank you for all that you have brought to DU over the years.
I am glad that you are here.

:hug:

[The Straight Story]

27. And thanks to my many friends here that got me through many a dark nights

I don't know what I would have done without you all at times.

[Major Hogwash]

26. Wow.

Certainly lays it on the line.

[davidwparker]

28. Shalom (peace) to you.

I still have my mother and would feel like you do if she were not hear. My dad has passed, but life would be different if my mother goes before me.

Shalom.

[xxqqqzme]

29. Thank you for sharing all those

memories. My dad died two years ago today. It is also my mother's birthday. I called her earlier today. I know this day is hard for her.



Thanks for the pictures of Andy. Nice to see his face again.

[proud patriot]

30. I've always wanted to be a evil cohorts

You honor your mother well :patriot: