Ask Auntie Pinko
October 12, 2001

Dear Auntie Pinko,

Is it true that all Constitutional attorneys are mentally challenged? I ask this because of recent statements by Ann "the Real Skank" Coulter and Mark "where's my hair" Levin regarding their association of the word murder with Bill Clinton and Gary Condit.

Zippy,

Rockaway, NJ

Dear Zippy,

Auntie Pinko assures you that there are many, many constitutional attorneys who refrain from making inflammatory and partisan accusations to promote their conservative agendas. I know some personally, and they're very nice, as well as very intelligent people.

Unfortunately for Mr. Clinton and Mr. Condit, they are "public figures" within the legal definition of the term, and are therefore not entitled to the same degree of protection from libel, slander, defamation, etc., that a private citizen can expect under the law. It is a sad commentary on our political culture that this vulnerability is so ruthlessly exploited for partisan ends-an uncivilized tendency from which even we Democrats are not immune.

While Auntie Pinko is very far from condoning the personal actions of many of our elected representatives, I do think that there are more practical and positive ways to judge the character of our elected representatives. And, unlike some observers on both ends of the political spectrum, I do believe that character is one of the criteria we should consider in evaluating the worthiness of our candidates and our leaders.

I would like to see us, as an electorate, focus first on the evidence of our leaders' positive moral qualities, rather than the negative moral qualities that persist in every human character. Do they show by their actions that they take a personal interest in the well-being of those less fortunate than themselves? Are they open-minded and committed to a lifelong process of learning about the needs and strengths of the people they serve? Do they value each individual for the worth of their humanity, rather than making assumptions about what kind of person is "worth more" than another kind of person? Is the resilient ego necessary to public life tempered by a generous ration of humility? Can they own up to their mistakes, and take meaningful action to make amends when they cause harm?

Another key indicator, to me, would be: Do they show an honest effort to live up to the highest standards of their profession?

For a constitutional lawyer to forget "presumption of innocence," and to demonstrate such eagerness to cruelly exploit the "public figure" vulnerability of a fellow human being in pursuit of partisan gain, clearly indicates that they, at least, are making no such effort. This is tragic, because of all professions, high standards are most critical to those we entrust with the scholarship, analysis, and guardianship of our Constitution. Who do you think should feel ashamed of themselves?

A very wise woman of my acquaintance once told me, "Show me a human being who invariably lives up to their own moral standards, and I'll show you a self-deluded hypocrite, or a scoundrel." People who remember this important truth are rarely the first to start heaving boulders at others' windows.

Thank you for asking Auntie Pinko!

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