Pelosi Says She Will Skip Trump and Negotiate Directly with Putin (Borowitz)

[Stonepounder]

https://bit.ly/2Qn1GBW

Pelosi Says She Will Skip Trump and Negotiate Directly with Putin

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a bold gambit to end the government shutdown, the House Speaker, Nancy Pelosi, said on Saturday that she would bypass Donald J. Trump and negotiate directly with the Russian President, Vladimir Putin.

“I owe it to the American people to bring this shutdown to the swiftest possible conclusion, and so I’m avoiding the middleman,” she said.

Pelosi, who is scheduled to board a plane to Moscow Saturday night, said that she had not informed Trump of her plans to deal directly with Putin. “Whatever,” she said.

In an official statement, Putin said that he welcomed Pelosi’s overture and shared her desire to end the shutdown. “At some point, I’d like to visit Yellowstone,” he said.

[dalton99a]

1. Kick

[NastyRiffraff]

2. Hah!

And a

[BootinUp]

3. Sometimes satire ain't far from reality. Nt

[Wounded Bear]

5. Getting harder and harder to tell the difference...

[Gothmog]

4. I love good satire

[TomCADem]

6. LOL

nt

[Firestorm49]

7. Far out. She'll be Putin On The Ritz.

[erronis]

15. OMFG! How'd you come up with that?

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

8. I know it's satire

But one wonders if it might be worth a shot.

[PeeJ52]

9. You know what's sad? I actually thought this was real...

Maybe she should do it. Eliminate the middle man.

[northoftheborder]

10. Clever!

[SayItLoud]

11. Wish everyone hadn't said it's sarcasm. The Fn MONRON in the Oral Office would believe it and

use the back channel communication system none of us know about to contact Putin!

[smirkymonkey]

12. K&R

[burrowowl]

13. K&R

[Honeycombe8]

14. I'll finish the OP.

I wish she WOULD say that, but...this is sarcasm.

[erronis]

16. The dump in the WH would think Putie is two-timing him.

[marble falls]

17. Absolutely love Borowitz.

[highplainsdem]

19. K&R. Love Borowitz!

[UTUSN]

20. K&R