We Used to Say That It Didn't Matter
I was listening to Joe Sudbay and Noah Michelson on the way home from work and it stirred me:
I've been around DU a long time and don't post a lot. But, one of my very early posts was to ask for advice for how to support our then middle-school aged son after he'd left a browser window open that showed he was at least questioning his orientation.
Ultimately, we decided to just maintain an open environment. To show support for the LGBTQ community. To say that "it didn't matter" who people love or how they identify. That everyone should be loved and respected for who they are.
He's in his early twenties now and is living openly as a gay man. We never had a formal conversation where he came out. At some point he mentioned someone he was interested in, looked at me and his mother, and said "I never made a big deal about it, because I knew it didn't matter to you." I'll never fully understand what his journey from questioning to openness was like, but I at least felt like we must have given him a safe space to make it.
But again, there was that phrase - "it didn't matter."
Today, as I listened to Sudbay and Michelson talk about this administration, their terrible and hateful policies, and their lasting impact on the judiciary, I realized it does matter.
It matters like hell.
My son is gay. Your brother or sister may be transgender. Maybe your neighbors are a same-sex couple. Or your best friend bisexual. Really, it doesn't matter. Except it does.
It matters that there are people who believe my son, and all members of the LGBTQ community, are "intrinsically disordered."
It matters that they would deny them care and services.
It matters that they would deny them housing.
It matters that they would deny them service to their country.
It matters that they would deny them employment and the dignity of work.
It matters that they would deny them the safety and security of marriage.
It matters that they would deny them the fulfillment of having a family.
It matters that they would beat, maim, and even kill them.
I wish I had some great rallying cry or call to action to end this post. But all I have is to keep loving, fighting as hard as I can, and to vote.
As allies it may not matter to us who our LGBTQ brothers and sisters love. But, it sure as hell matters that we love them.
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I'd say "welcome to DU" but I see you've been around a while too. I read all the time, but do not post a lot.
And thank you for the wake up call! 
I listen to Signorile's show every day. Michelson is a regular and Sudbay is on a lot. But yesterday, I heard a little more strain and urgency in their voices. It shook me up.
There are large groups of people living with the anxiety and threat of not keeping, or ever being able to get, the things that I take for granted every day. It shouldn't be that way.
With Trump, that sense of safety is gone. Things we took for granted are suddenly upside down and we never know what kinds of things we never gave a second thought about before are going to be affected or who or what will be targeted. These are scary times since we never know what's going to happen next. Anxiety is rampant these days for all kinds of unexpected reasons. You're definitely not alone. 
I am very grateful to you and the many straight allies that support and defend the lives of the LGBTQ community.
Your son is VERY fortunate to have you as a parent.
It took me a few more years to learn what they were called: Republicans.
I feel like I've been fighting them my entire life, voting against them, railing against them online. It takes a lot of energy, and it never ends because they never stop attacking our families. I am only comforted by the wins we've had, and there have been a lot. But I can't rest because I know if they had a mandate from the public to re-criminalize our sex lives, marriages, adoption, military service, etc., they'd do it in a heartbeat. This is a fight I'll be in for my entire adult life. Trumpism is mostly anti-immigrant but it could turn against us very easily so I speak out about that too. "First they came for the immigrants..."
Thanks for your support. I wish my mother had been more like you. 
Wishing my father had been more like you.
I find it sickeningly funny when the RWNJ's refer to the "gay agenda" as some demonized attempt to "make" children gay, when the reality is the only agenda is to dispel the phobias, end the stigmatization and bullying of those who don't fall within the narrow parameters of dogmatized morality. The agenda is to help LGBTQ and questioning youth feel comfortable to be themselves.
Furthermore, this has taken such a backwards turn. The U.S.A. is supposed to be a refuge for the oppressed, instead the Trumpers are attempting to pervert that.
I would love if someday the U.S.A. were to offer refuge and rescue to LGBT worldwide, hopefully providing alternatives to inhumane brutality. Plus, heaven only knows once Trumpism dies down, we are going to need an army of fashion designers and interior decorators, because... oh, gurl:
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