When Lev Parnas was arrested he was carrying 5 phones, Trump straws, & a shit ton of cash

[MelissaB]

ICYMI, per an FBI document we obtained, Lev Parnas was carrying Trump straws, 5 cell phones, and a ton of cash when he was arrested

Link to tweet

[Dennis Donovan]

1. "carrying Trump straws, 5 cell phones, and a ton of cash"

Don't we all?

[MelissaB]

4. Gotta be a good reason for those straws.

:snort:

[bronxiteforever]

2. Kick and recommend for visibility.

[dalton99a]

3. Kick

[mindfulNJ]

5. I'm sure

there's an innocent explanation!

[scrabblequeen40]

6. Straws? Like the kind you drink with? EOM

who the fuck carries drinking straws around?

[Autumn]

7. Souvenir "snort" straws? After all what wealthy Russian mobster wouldn't want to snort coke out of

Trump straws.

[jcgoldie]

8. Roll up the cash to snort the coke

These are obviously best for sucking down massive big gulp quantities of bullshit.

[Initech]

10. Or some very finely chopped adderall if you're into that sort of thing.

[Initech]

9. Straws? Really???

[Proud Liberal Dem]

11. Trump straws suck!! ;-)

[Sneederbunk]

12. One of Rudy's wiseguys.