What a great surprise! I just discovered I have a bidet!

Well, somewhat.

This might come as a useful suggestion to those of you who haven't thought of this yet:

The commode in one of my bathrooms is close to a bathtub that has a long shower hose attachment. It reaches all the way inside the toilet, and I can actually reach the water handles to turn it on!

LOL

Funny thing, though... I have a lot of toilet paper on hand.