Stupid American Learns Life Lesson in Canada
That stupid American is me. I'm coming to you tonight from Portage la Prairie in Manitoba, where I'm staying with my cousin Rick and his Canadian wife Renee. I got tested for COVID-19 yesterday (Thursday.) There are zero tests in my state thus far, so I came up here, arriving two days before Trudeau closed the border, and have been staying at Rick and Renee's since then. I don't know when I'll be getting my test results back. And I don't know when the border will be open again. But R&R have been great, and have assured me I can reside with them till I'm able to come home. But that's what this post is really about.
It's about what happened last night (again, Thursday). Rick drove me back from Winnipeg, Where my test was conducted, and the three of us were sitting in the den, watching a movie being broadcast by Global, one of Canada, major TV networks. I've watched numerous movies and shows on the tube since my arrival, and kept getting this feeling there was a difference in the way these Canadian networks (there are also the CBC and CTV, plus a couple of others whose names escape me at this moment) aired programs from the way it's done in the U.S. Last night, it finally crystallized in my 67-year-old brain (crack whatever jokes you want!) exactly what the difference was.
Up here, just like in America, dramatic presentations often come with viewer-discretion advisories. The movie we were watching was two hours long. Actually a bit less, but Canada has commercials too. At the beginning of the film, we were told it contained scenes of violence, as well as nudity, sexuality, and mature themes. These were all repeated one hour later, at the movie's halfway point. But after all the other commercial breaks, before going back to the show, only the violence advisory appeared. The sexual/mature advisories did not.
I pointed this out and wondered aloud why this was so, prompting Rick to laugh and Renee to chuckle. Before I could ask just what was going on, Rick, still chuckling, leaned toward me and said, "I was wondering that for over a month when I first got here. Then Renee explained it to me."
I have to say I was a little pissed off by this, feeling as though they were sharing a joke at my expense.
So, I turned to Renee and said, "Okay, then, I'm asking: why do movies and TV shows here have all kinds of warnings about violence but only a few about sex?"
Renee just looked at me and replied, "Because violence kills and injures a HELLUVA lot more people than sex does."
Ever have a moment where you suddenly realize you've been a total fucking idiot about something your whole damn life? Like there's been an elephant 10 feet in front of you all those years and you only noticed the blasted thing just now??? THAT'S how I felt!
Of course a society like Canada's. or Sweden's, or France's, where, if somebody slightly offends you, your first instinct actually ISN'T to grab a gun and blow his/her head off, would (properly) deem violence to be more destructive than natural, healthy human sexuality! Our country is the one so infected with Puritanical bullshit that that would even be a question!
Suffice it to say, Mind Thoroughly Blown. But by common fucking sense, NOT a lead projectile!!!
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