More Things You Have To Believe To Be A Republican Today: Antisocial Distancing Edition

[Fritz67]

(I was going to call it the "When I Said I Needed Brain Bleach, I Didn't Mean It Literally Edition", but it wouldn't let me make a thread title that long.)

(No. 43 in an occasional series)

I just can't come up with any semi-pithy introduction this time, so let's just get to the semi-pithy entries.

Reposts and Updates:

I did manage to skip one whole list without feeling like I had to repost this one:
* Degenerate Perverts Unfit For Public Life: Joe Biden (Updated), John Conyers, John Edwards, Al Franken, Katie Hill, Elliot Spitzer, Anthony Wiener; Great Americans Who Believe In Family Values And Deserve A "Mulligan" or Two Or Three: Joe Barton, Herman Cain, Larry Craig, Steve DesJarlais, Joe Fain, Jerry Fallwell Jr, Mark Foley, Will Gardner, Newt Gingrich, Eric Greitens, Curtis Hill, Duncan Hunter, Jim Jordan, Brett Kavanaugh, Nathan Larson, Rush Limbaugh, Vance McAllister, Roy Moore, Bill O'Reilly, Bill Sanderson, Mark Sanford, David Stringer, Clarence Thomas, Donald Trump, David Vitter, and Steve Wynn (#32, Feb. 2018)

Just a reminder as the Republicans heat up their smear campaign of Joe Biden's son...

* Scandal: Hunter Biden's "lucrative business deal" in Ukraine. Not A Scandal: Donald Trump Jr, Eric Trump, and Ivanka Trump's lucrative business deals in Ireland, India, Indonesia, Uruguay, Turkey, the Philippines, China, etc. (#41, Oct. 2019)

* Traitors: Alexander Vindman, Brett Crozier. Heroic patriot: Eddie Gallagher. (#42, Feb 2020)

All-New More Things You Have To Believe To Be A Republican Today:

* Teenage girls who speak out against climate change deserve to be raped.

* Be afraid of Corona beer.

But...

* The coronavirus won't affect anyone who supports Trump.

Plus...

* The coronavirus is good for America anyway.

* Newest crime: Driving While Black With An Air Freshener.

* You're more interested in taking away women's reproductive rights than fighting the coronavirus pandemic.

* Sean Hannity never called COVID-19 a "hoax"; neither did Trump.

* You can shoot the coronavirus.

* 2009: You were enraged when Alan Grayson described Republican's ideal health care as "Don't get sick, and if you do die quickly". 2020: Republican ideal health care: Don't get sick, and if you do die quickly.

* Keeping millions of people from dying is exactly the same thing as appeasing Nazis.

Which is a weird thing to say--today's Republicans are all about appeasing Nazis. Or being Nazis.

Paraphrased from Stinky The Clown:
* It was dangerous, infuriating nepotism when Bill Clinton put his lawyer wife in charge of heath care reform. It's okay that Donald Trump put his real-estate broker son-in-law in charge of COVID-19 response.

* It is infuriating when governments lie to their citizens about an impending pandemic, and try to hide it's severity. But only when it's the Chinese government.

Ungh. And the many stupid people in my state voted for this asshole...
* The economy is more important that human life.

I mean, we already knew that Republicans thought that, but they've seldom been so brazenly open about it.

* You're angry that after Trump told state governors that they were on their own in regards to COVID-19 testing, they actually went and secured their own tests.

Because, of course, more testing means more positive results meaning Trump's "Open everything!!!" blather looks dumber and dumber.

* Donald Trump is a medical genius. Because he and he alone realized drinking Clorox will cure the coronavirus.

Medical degree from Trump University? All that's missing now is him saying that mixing the bleach with Kool-Aid will make it work even better.

* Another sign that Trump is a strong, brave leader: Leaving a press conference rather than face the possibility of questions he doesn't like.

Verbatim from Dan Rather:
* Sarcasm n. a meaningless catch-all word employed in a vain attempt to explain away embarrassingly stupid statements.

* "Small Business": Ritz-Carlton hotels.

* You don't negotiate or give in to terrorists unless they're heavily armed white Christians and Trump supporters.

* Trying to avoid catching COVID-19 is unpatriotic, cowardly, and treasonous.

* Pandemic protection measures are exactly the same thing as a genocidal Holocaust.

* "Unity" = "Stop pointing out how badly a Republican has screwed things up".

* Being called out on your bullshit and lies is worse than being murdered.

* And another new crime: Jogging While Black.

[pwb]

1. I try to avoid this fringe crap.

Why post this here?

[Mopar151]

2. Maybe it isn't so "fringe"

It is SATIRE, not litteral truth. And it exposes a number of the propaganda devices used by the hatemongers who call themselves "Conservatives"

[pwb]

3. Or it just presents the rights disinformation to

people who don't want to read or hear it, trying to change them?????? Who does not know our enemy by now?? We don't need reminding.

[Mopar151]

4. Exposure is what this needs!

I'm not willing to let people die over cognitive dissonance.

[keithbvadu2]

6. "Exposure" - good word for it.

[OldBaldy1701E]

5. Not just 'conservative'...

'Family Value' representatives. 'Good Christians'. This points out one of my main complaints with the Rethug party. They want to crow about how they are about family and traditional marriage (which still cracks me up in that it was the legal issue of marriage that we wanted to exist. We never said a thing about your desire to spend tons of money and go get married in a house or worship. How are we 'attacking traditional marriage'? Hilarious.) and yet the data says that, as far as indiscretions go, the Rethugs are way out in front of the curve.

I agree... taking the high road these days is not going to change a thing. This has to be out there so everyone can see what these vultures and weasels are doing. Regardless of the delivery system, the information is vital.