Why Did Trump Cross The Road?

[L. Coyote]

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[SideStep]

1. Because the the US military assisted him.

That's the only way this chicken could cross the road.

[fleur-de-lisa]

2. Your response is the best one!

[EarlG]

3. I made this last night then got distracted and forgot to post it

So I'll just drop it off here...

[L. Coyote]

5. That's as close as he'll ever get to that again.

Most expensive seven seconds in political history.

[tanyev]

4. It's an excellent question, really.

He could have stood anywhere on the White House grounds and held up a Bible and made those comments. Why go to all that trouble to drag St. John’s Episcopal Church into it?

[L. Coyote]

8. To have a photo as counterpoint to #BunkerBaby

Search that hashtag on Twitter.

Link to tweet

[tinrobot]

20. So he could appear "strong" like Putin

Unfortunately, he can't pull off that look.

[rickford66]

6. Because he was chicken ?

[IllinoisBirdWatcher]

7. No. Because he was stapled to the chicken. n/t

[TheBlackAdder]

12. I thought is was because Trump IS a Chicken!

[Cha]

9. Chickenshit BLOTUS could Not have Crossed the Road w/o ordering Peaceful Protestors

shot with rubber Bullets & Tear Gassed

Good to see you back, L Coyote

[L. Coyote]

10. About right, no way he would have just gone over there.

Just back to drop these memes. Such an iconic moment, the epitome of fake bullshittery.

[Cha]

11. ..

Stay!

[spanone]

13. ...

[L. Coyote]

14. Excellente.

Link to tweet

Link to tweet

[diva77]

15. L Coyote is back! Haven't seen you for a long time!

[L. Coyote]

17. Still alive, been active on dKos.

Stephanie Babich-Harvey
May 29 at 12:19 AM · Public
I don’t know who wrote this but it absolutely wins the internet.

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

DONALD TRUMP: I've been told by many sources, good sources - they're very good sources - that the chicken crossed the road. All the Fake News wants to do is write nasty things about the road, but it's a really good road. It's a beautiful road. Everyone knows how beautiful it is.

Joe Biden: Why did the chicken do the...thing in the...you know the rest.

SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because, gosh-darn it, he's a maverick!

BARACK OBAMA: Let me be perfectly clear, if the chickens like their eggs they can keep their eggs. No chicken will be required to cross the road to surrender her eggs. Period.

AOC: Chickens should not be forced to lay eggs! This is because of corporate greed! Eggs should be able to lay themselves.

HILLARY CLINTON: What difference at this point does it make why the chicken crossed the road.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or against us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken.

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white?

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he is acting by not taking on his current problems before adding any new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross the road so badly. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a NEW CAR so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way the chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish it's lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

I must add why doesn't anyone ask, "Who put the road in the way of the chicken?" Chickens everywhere need to be free of obstacles to their path in life!

[panader0]

18. Bookmarking this. Very funny stuff, thanks.

[fishwax]

16. blessed are the teargassers

I don't remember that from the sermon on the mount, but I'm sure it'll be there in the trump revised edition.

[tinrobot]

19. But her emails