The Devil Went Down To Moscow (with zero apologies to Charlie Daniels)
The Devil went down to Moscow, he was looking for a brand new pet
He was ripe for fallin’ for a brand-new Stalin but he really hadn’t seen one yet
When he came across this bald dude, brewin’ up some polonium tea
So the Devil laid his leg on a Faberge egg and said “Boy, come talk to me!”
“I bet you may have heard, dear boy, that’s it’s humans I love to fuck
But I’m wastin’ time, and I’ve searched my mind, and I’m just plain out of luck!.”
The boy said “My name’s Vladimir and you can’t have my soul!
But I’m your man and I’ve got a plan, and it involves a certain orange asshole.
You see, there’s a famous TV star, spent his whole life fleecing the rubes
And it doesn’t really matter that a set of keys is to him like a Rubik’s Cube
He’ll wave the flag, and belch and brag, and talk about blacks and Jews
And it doesn’t really matter ‘bout a thing he says, cause he’ll always lead the news.”
So the Devil logged onto Facebook, and he dropped by Fancy Bear
And he watched the tapes and the teenage rapes by the man with the orange hair
And it wasn’t too long before he figured it out – all he needed was a big hotel
With a quick hack here and a porn star there, he could drag a whole nation to hell
With a great big bag of money, the Devil roamed far and wide
He appeared on Fox, wearing stylish socks, and talked about American pride
And the slack-jawed yokels thronged around every time he made his pitch
And they voted exactly like he told them to, so that they could Trump That Bitch
It wasn’t too many years later, as the planet began to burn
The Devil flew back to Moscow, just to see what Vlad had learned
Vlad leaned back in his chair with an icy stare, and said “I’m feeling slightly numb –
I never thought it would be so easy, or that they were so Goddamned dumb.”
= new reply since forum marked as read
-Laelth
