Jerry Falwell Jr. falls down in drunken stupor, blood all over the place.

[yellowcanine]

https://www.rawstory.com/2020/09/drunk-and-disgraced-jerry-falwell-jr-lost-a-lot-of-blood-after-fall-wife-becki-told-911-report/

Jerry Falwell, Jr. fell down, cut himself, and lost “a lot of blood,” his wife Becki Falwell told the 911 operator the night the disgraced and now-former Liberty University chancellor and president officially resigned.

Becki Falwell said she received a call from her husband around 11 PM when she was at church. He said he was bleeding and had cuts on his face. She said when she arrived home she had to break down the locked back door with a chair.

“The dispatcher asked whether her husband had been drinking alcohol; Becki Falwell said ‘yes.’ When asked if he had been drinking ‘heavily,’ she said, ‘I’m not going to answer that question.'”

Well gee, Becki, you call the paramedics, they need to know a few things, like how drunk is he?

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

1. "I'm falling down drunk and i can't get up!!!!" Jerry Falwell jr.

[lindysalsagal]

2. "It's all in god's plan."

I dunnoo. I just know they say that all the time, so, it must be true, right?

[jaysunb]

3. Church at 11pm ?????

Sounds like Flip Wilsons " Church of What's Happing Now "

[PCIntern]

6. Sex is a Holy Experience

At least I’ve been told that....on numerous occasions.

[Bev54]

14. That was my initial reaction as well

Church at a 11PM? With whom?

[orwell]

4. Cocktails with Jesus...

...I'm guessing Bloody Marys...

[empedocles]

12. Fits

[demmiblue]

13. ...

[WyattKansas]

5. Like anyone who says to a 911 operator, "I'm not going to answer that question"...

Is not immediately telling everyone involved that he is extremely drunk or under the influence.

[Leith]

7. Church, eh?

That sounds like setting up an alibi. Outside of Christmas Eve, is there anything going on at a church around 11pm?

And... who leaves the house expecting to be out so late without a door key?

<*sniff!*> Something smells off...

[Luz]

10. I'm gonna say it. My first thoughts were that she beat the

shit outta his drunk ass for bringing her perfectly charmed life to a screeching halt. Luncheons with her pious lady friends from church must be tense these days.

[Leith]

11. Well, yeah

Otherwise, falling down and cutting your face are usually two separate accidents.

Getting hit repeatedly with a chair strong enough to break in a back door could cause both bruising and cuts at the same time.

I wonder if she knows that CSIs can tell the difference at a glance?

[DavidDvorkin]

8. Passersby were amazed by the large amounts of blood

As The Onion might have said.

[sfstaxprep]

9. I Still Think She Beat His A&* Up

He fell down the stairs? Suuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrre.

[edbermac]

15. He fell down after she cracked his head open.

[Kingofalldems]

16. No way she was in church.