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Borowitz: Cincinnati Bengals have declared themselves the winners of next February's Super Bowl.
CINCINNATI (The Borowitz Report)—In an early-morning victory statement that took many in the N.F.L. by surprise, the Cincinnati Bengals have declared themselves the winners of next February’s Super Bowl.
The declaration of victory seemed designed to stir controversy, in no small part because sixty minutes of the sixty-minute-long contest have yet to be played.
The declaration of victory seemed designed to stir controversy, in no small part because sixty minutes of the sixty-minute-long contest have yet to be played.
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/cincinnati-bengals-announce-that-they-have-won-super-bowl
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