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Thu Dec 3, 2020, 10:45 PM

Barr Begs Trump Not to Let One Isolated Incident of Honesty Wipe Out Two Years of Lying

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—With his job on the line, Attorney General William Barr begged Donald J. Trump not to let one isolated incident of honesty wipe out two years of wonderful lying.

According to those who witnessed the Oval Office meeting between the two men, Barr desperately sought to remind Trump of the steady stream of outrageous whoppers that he had spewed during his tenure as the President’s toadying lackey.

“What about when I said the Mueller report exonerated you?” Barr pleaded. “That was a great one, wasn’t it?”

“And remember when I said that no tear gas was used on the protesters in Lafayette Park?” he said. “We’ve had so many good times together.”

The Attorney General tried to excuse his one moment of honesty as “temporary insanity” and assured Trump that it would “never happen again.”

“Even the greatest liars slip and tell the truth sometimes,” he said.

“I don’t,” Trump frostily replied.


Short article, no more at link: https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/barr-begs-trump-not-to-let-one-isolated-incident-of-honesty-wipe-out-two-years-of-lying




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Arrow 7 replies Author Time Post
Reply Barr Begs Trump Not to Let One Isolated Incident of Honesty Wipe Out Two Years of Lying (Original post)
Rhiannon12866 Dec 3 OP
RainCaster Dec 3 #1
Brother Buzz Dec 3 #2
NYC Liberal Dec 4 #6
Rhiannon12866 Dec 4 #7
NCjack Dec 4 #3
Gothmog Dec 4 #4
MissMillie Dec 4 #5

Response to Rhiannon12866 (Original post)

Thu Dec 3, 2020, 10:56 PM

1. Only two?

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Response to RainCaster (Reply #1)

Thu Dec 3, 2020, 11:02 PM

2. Barr succeeded Jeff Sessions

The ass has been in office almost two years

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Response to Brother Buzz (Reply #2)

Fri Dec 4, 2020, 09:43 AM

6. The last two years have felt like 10.

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Response to NYC Liberal (Reply #6)

Fri Dec 4, 2020, 12:56 PM

7. At least!

Seems like decades!

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Response to Rhiannon12866 (Original post)

Fri Dec 4, 2020, 04:42 AM

3. Trump should fire Barr and abolish the office of AG, which Barr

proved is not needed.

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Response to Rhiannon12866 (Original post)

Fri Dec 4, 2020, 09:16 AM

4. I love good satire

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Response to Rhiannon12866 (Original post)

Fri Dec 4, 2020, 09:30 AM

5. I knew it had to be Borowitz!

Thanks!

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