A school-related Covid horror story

[markpkessinger]

A high school classmate who teaches special needs kids in Arizona lost her husband to Covid this weekend. She doesn't wish to be identified, but does think her story should be told, given the push to open schools as quickly as possible.

I know they are saying schools aren't a significant vector of transmission. I dare someone to tell that to my friend. Here's what she wrote to me (shared with permission):

I work with children with special needs. We returned to school in person the end of October. Our district was great about providing PPE and setting up spaces so we could spread students out. I felt as safe as possible given the situation.
I kept my husband safe from October until January. I followed every precaution. Parents did too. District was supportive.

Our district worked tirelessly to get us scheduled to be vaccinated, prioritizing therapists and teachers working with our most severely impaired children.

My first vaccination was scheduled for January 16. On January 14, a family made a decision that changed my life. Knowing that they had another child at home who was symptomatic and tested positive for COVID, they knowingly sent their HS child with special needs to school. They never had him tested. They never warned us. Per district protocol, he was to have been kept home. This requirement was sent to every parent in the district.

His deficits are severe. We can’t keep him masked. He spits, bites, yells, hits, scratches, etc. There is no way to socially distance from him. I was wearing PPE.

It wasn’t enough. He was an asymptomatic carrier. This family KNOWINGLY put all of us at risk.

My exposure was 1/14. I had my vaccine 1/16, but it didn’t have enough time to work. I tested positive 1/21 and my husband did on
1/23. I lost him 2/15.

I love working with children with special needs. I’ve done it for 37 years. I never thought it would be my husband’s death sentence.

I have no words for this -- just utterly horrific. We need to SLOW DOWN on the push to reopen schools!

[MLAA]

1. Heartbreaking. The irresponsibility of the family that sent their child to school

knowing another family member was tested positive should be considered manslaughter.

[markpkessinger]

2. Couldn't agree more! n/t

[lindysalsagal]

31. Not to defend them, but special needs families can often be in terrible shape. They are not able to

find anyone to be with their child, because they are dangerous (sometimes). So it was likely a choice between losing a paycheck or just hoping their kid wasn't positive.

As a nation, we lack sufficient support for special needs families. That goes for drug addiction and mental health, as well.

We need to grow the hell up and take responsibility for the most fragile citizens. But we don't want to pay.

Same reason teachers aren't vaccinated: Cost/benefit ratio.

I don't think teachers should be in school without vaccinations. Period.

[WinstonSmith4740]

41. I taught SPED for a while.

Loved those kids, but their parents aren't the only ones sending their kids to school sick. It happens all the time. Parents have to make a choice between taking the day off work, or sending the kids in sick. Some workplaces don't give their employees sick leave, so the kid goes to school. Or parents cop the attitude that "It's just a cold". I teach high school, so at least the kids know to cover their mouths, but a 2nd grader? Not so much.

There's not a teacher who doesn't know that classrooms are damned petri dishes. It's one of the reasons we tend to get sick in the fall when the kids come back, and after winter and spring breaks. Here in Vegas, pretty much like everywhere else, there's a big push to get the kids back in school. K-3 is going back March 1. Our union has assured us they will back us if we don't want to go back into the classroom...I'm OK because I'm in what's considered in a "high risk" (over 65) group, and I'm retiring in June, so they really can't threaten me with anything.

Bottom line for me here is that I love my kids. I miss being in a classroom with them. I teach at a Title 1 school so I know that school is the only safe, supportive place that some of these kids have. But I'm not willing to get sick or die for them, or endanger my family and friends. And I'm still trying to figure out when and why teachers became 100% responsible for kid's mental health.

[iemitsu]

52. Well put. Both my wife and I retired to avoid going back to the classroom.

We loved teaching but not enough to die for it.

[notinkansas]

3. This scenario will! be repeated many, many times.

"Knowing that they had another child at home who was symptomatic and tested positive for COVID, they knowingly sent their HS child with special needs to school. They never had him tested. They never warned us. Per district protocol, he was to have been kept home. This requirement was sent to every parent in the district. "

My daughter was a director of day care centers for a long time. Sick children are sent to day care facilities and to schools all the time. Schools should not be reopened until all teachers and school staff have been fully vaccinated - especially because now they will be dealing with asymptomatic as well as sick students.

[Lonestarblue]

14. Far too many parents rely on schools as babysitters.

I understand that child care is expensive and maybe even completely unavailable now, but sending sick kids to school is not new. Sending a kid who potentially has the virus and one whose issues prevent safety measures is beyond irresponsible. We need child care options that people can afford because in most families both parents work today.

I also think that in this age of a highly contagious virus, no child who cannot follow safety procedures should be allowed in schools. Protection of teachers and other students is also important.

[SheltieLover]

4. Pushing to open schools is ridiculous!

Kids will live without in-person instruction, but won't fare so well as orphaned wards of the state or with long-haul covid or incapicated caregivers!

This is such a sad story!

Imagine how "safe" in-person learning is in mask hole USA where officials do not strictly hold students & staff to safety protocols!

We all know what happens every year with the flu when kids return to school...

Ty for sharing this sad and infuriating story.

[wiggs]

5. Evidence is being ignored. Schools not as safe as headlines suggest. See link

https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1346362159446577154.html

[Klaralven]

6. Why is such a child in a HS, instead of an appropriate institutional setting?

His deficits are severe. We can’t keep him masked. He spits, bites, yells, hits, scratches, etc. There is no way to socially distance from him.

[Ziggysmom]

12. I was thinking the same thing!

School is just respite for the family, I doubt he really learns much? Hard to tell, I know. The parents are disgusting!

[Jimbo S]

19. Integration?

Introducing special needs kids into mainstream society.

[Klaralven]

20. I suppose that is the hope, but does it actually work?

[lindysalsagal]

32. Everyone involved defines "working" differently. There's the rub.

[VA_Jill]

37. There are no longer

many institutions for such people. Group homes are few and hard to get into, and for those with severe deficits are nearly non-existent.

Let me tell you a story. There used to be a very excellent state-run institution for people with special needs not far from where I lived in Tennessee for many years. For a long time, before the integration of people with mild deficits into society, it was home to them, and for many, whose families had died, it was the only home they knew and had been for many years. For several years I worked at the hospital where most of them went when they were sick. Most of the elderly weren't too different from our "regular" elderly, except for being perhaps a bit more trusting and, of course, illiterate. The younger ones were the ones with more severe deficits, and when they came in, they always appeared well cared for and clean despite their conditions. Generally, their families would come to see them when they were hospitalized and it was obvious they cared for these people, they just couldn't keep them at home. Well, several years ago, the decision was made from the (GOP) top to close this place, "integrate" what patients they could into society, and transfer the rest either to nursing homes or to an institution near Nashville. This obviously did not take the well-being of either the patients or the families into consideration. Almost all the elderly and a good share of the other patients were simply turfed to nursing homes, although there weren't enough skilled beds for the ones who really needed a lot of care. The rest were sent on to the other facility, which meant that in order to see them, their families had to make a 2.5 hour journey each way. Group home? Nah. It's easier to warehouse them if you can. It's the Repugnican way. Families don't matter.

[wnylib]

38. There was a court ruling on this.

Can't remember the date now, but it was some years ago. It says that children with special needs must receive equal educational opportunities in the least restrictive setting possible. In some cases that means mainstreaming in a regular classroom with an aide to assist the teacher, although some schools can't afford the aide and don't provide any. In other cases it means a separate classroom but in a regular school building appropriate to the child's age, e.g. elementary or high school, so the special needs student can interact with peers whenever possible.

[WinstonSmith4740]

49. It's part of American with Disabilities Act. (ADA)

I don't think it's a consequence they thought of when writing the bill, but since all public buildings have to be accessible to all people, regardless of disability, schools kind of got caught in the middle. You're right...some of these kids are so far off the rails, we aren't teaching them anything...we're baby sitting. I had 3 kids in my class that were mentally 3-6 months old. Not sure exactly what I was supposed to be teaching them, but they were there. And to be brutally frank, there's no doubt in my mind that parents send those kids in just to have time away from them. I've had the biters & spitters...their parents are fried emotionally, physically, and psychologically and need a break, so I get it. And as long as that kid has an IEP (Individualized Education Program), it's damn near impossible to get them out of the public school system if that's where their parents want them to be. We have special school placement for the really bad problems (like the kid referenced) but that kid has to do something so over the top MORE THAN ONCE for us to even be able to suggest special placement.

But this speaks more to the lack of proper facilities with trained people there. When Reagan took his meat cleaver to school budgets and mental health budgets back in the 80's, a lot of the facilities designed for those folks shut down. And nobody can afford day care for Special Needs kids.

[BSdetect]

7. Then there are the anti vax people to consider - how many will do similar?

[brewens]

8. There are people still denying the seriousness of COVID who are going out with symptoms

as if it was just a minor cold. Even if they think it's COVID, they feel it's better to just let it do it's thing. That behavior is mostly on Trump.

[snacker]

9. This story breaks my heart.

[Sugar Smack]

10. Every day, we're hearing more about deadly mutations,

Mutations of Coronavirus coming from Africa and the UK and combining very quickly. How can any thinking adult being decide this is a good time to open schools? That's a really sad story.

[theaocp]

11. There's the rub.

It’s not about just us teachers. It’s our loved ones at home. Let’s assume I’m ready to put my life at risk. You sure I’m ready to put my wife’s life on the roulette table, too? Multiply that times the number of teacher families in this country. Who cares, amiright?

[wnylib]

40. I've mentioned this before in other posts.

I know a family with 7 children. One child was exposed at school and notified to quarantine. He did, and apparently had caught it from his exposure. It spread to his siblings and parents at home. They all recovered eventually, the kids faster than the parents. One parent, though, still has lingering fatigue and focus problems.

So the families of other students are also at risk as well as teachers and their families - and the community at large.

[demtenjeep]

47. exactly

this is why I refuse to be in the building until hubby and I are both vaccinated

[niyad]

13. Utterly heartbreaking, and words are inadequate. The family of one of my friends are all

teachers in Comanche County, OK., one of the hottest spots in the nation. The districts are not as proactive as your friend's, and the infection rate is insane. She is beyond worried sick about all of them. No push for vaccinating staff. Grrrrrr.

[NJCher]

15. how awful

this family essentially killed a teacher's husband, not to mention getting her ill, too.

I have a class this afternoon. Makes me shudder, too, having read this story.

I think I can hold it outside and I will.

No special needs kids in my class. They are elementary school kids who have been very good about wearing their masks, not removing them, and keeping distant. It is six kids and if the class is held indoors on a basketball court.

Still.....

At least my spouse has had his first shot.

[MontanaMama]

16. I had a conversation about school transmission

with a customer of mine who lives in a deep red part of Montana. His 11 year old daughter caught it from her teacher who was an anti-masker. This maskhole teacher infected all 23 of her students. So, his 11 year old brings Covid home and the whole family gets it but, before they know they’re sick, my customer who ended up getting VERY sick infected his whole staff and all their families. My customer was deathly ill, hospitalized twice and was finally in the mend after 2 months of hell. They live in a small community where people think they’re relatively safe. Nobody is safe or exempt from Covid.

[Iggo]

17. You have to trust the families of all the other kids at the school.

And I don’t.

It’s that simple.

[Nay]

24. And you have no reason to trust the families. Between maskholes and parents who are

forced to go to work or starve, they will send their kids to school no matter what. Just ask teachers who are used to kids being sent to school with regular illnesses -- parents load the kids up with Tylenol so they aren't obviously feverish and ill, send them in, and hope the meds don't wear off before they come home.

[seta1950]

18. I'm so 😢 sorry

How could those parents do that? That’s awful

[DENVERPOPS]

21. Even during normal times

people consider their kids going to school as ultra cheap child care...............

Schools, at this point, should all be considered nothing more than giant Petri Dishes....................

My parents were both public school teachers, and they brought home EVERYTHING.........

[Dustlawyer]

22. My paralegal lost her best friend to COVID last September. Her friend was an elementary

special needs teacher age 50.

My son is a HS English teacher. He and his GF live together and were working from home. They ordered everything delivered and took all precautions. His School District changed policy and allowed students to chose to go back to school or stay at home online. The teachers were required to work with these students on a 2 day a week rotation. He got COVID and so did his GF. They are thankfully ok now.

My daughter is a special needs teacher and she told me they are running out of teachers as so many are out on quarantine or with COVID due to COVID kids coming to school.

Hard for me to believe it is really ok to have them teach kids in person this semester.

[MoonlitKnight]

23. It only takes one irresponsible person.

No matter the precautions it only takes one person to infect many others and lead to death and destruction.

It will be far worse than anything we have seen over the past year once the new variants start running rampant. It takes about six weeks from first shot to safety with the vaccines. The time leading up to that first appointment to two weeks after the second shot is the time to be at your most vigilant.

There is absolutely no good reason to be opening schools, bars, restaurants and gyms right now. People simply cannot be trusted to keep others safe.

[uponit7771]

28. +1, "There is absolutely no good reason to be opening schools, bars, restaurants and gyms right now"

We can all get the infection rate down to single digits so we can contact trace better and have more effective turn around on testing.

Right now is a great time to do that, half the country is frozen and mobility has slowed down, shut every county down with a > 5% PTR.

Get money out to people so they don't feel like they have to go to in person work ... we can do what > 75% of the other countries did to beat CV19 spread.

Right now the US is nearer the bottom when it comes to defeating CV19 spread because of stupid assed MAGA Media and governors.

In regards to kids, we have 3 of them and the lack of data when it comes to exposure rate for kids that's pissing me off. We don't see exposure rate with cured, sick, hospitalized or dead data and our school system isn't contact tracing so we see who's been exposed.

Relying on parents to test kids twice weekly isn't smart either, ... Putin's Whore left the country so far behind relative where we could be.

[MoonlitKnight]

53. The UK variant is hitting kids hard

They had to close schools.

Sure, there is one study of a school district that did everything right and spread was not as bad as the overall community. That should be the case. It should be safer than going to a restaurant or a store. But it’s not better than staying home and doing drive through, curbside and delivery.

I also think it’s worse to bounce from remote to on-site back to remote over and over. Enough with the half measures.

[uponit7771]

54. Just damn, CV is a freakin horror movie and now there's a variant that hits kids ?! ... damn

[PaulRevere08]

25. How absolutely sad and terrible. My wife is a teacher in our community

near Boston and there is so much pressure from parents to open the schools full time. They don't care about how teaching will take place - sitting at a desk looking at a Zoom session because the teacher still has other students at home. All they care about is that the kid is not home interrupting them. They point to studies that prove how safe schools are. One I saw was from a small and rural district in Wisconsin that did no tracing or asymptomatic testing. Another from France where again a small rural district, with a very low infection rate to begin with and only a few data points.

It's school vacation week and so many families are traveling I would not be surprised to find another hot spot to kick off when they return.

[grantcart]

26. Vaccinate all teachers and spouses now

[Susan Calvin]

29. But then there's the variants. nt

[grantcart]

42. The Moderna (and Pfiser) vaccine is equally effective against the variants

The Modenra vaccine was developed on attacking the architecture of the Corona Virus (i.e. the external spurs) and not on the internal working of the particular strain of the virus, like traditional vaccines and the Johnson and Johnson virus.

https://www.who.int/news-room/feature-stories/detail/the-moderna-covid-19-mrna-1273-vaccine-what-you-need-to-know?gclid=CjwKCAiAmrOBBhA0EiwArn3mfPM_bZ5Sj-QBnW4YvbQVeExfaSSjbitwBw36CZzkKxnHQVJvtKDb8RoCOBsQAvD_BwE

Based on the evidence so far, the new variants of SARS-CoV-2, including the B.1.1.7 and the 501Y.V2, do not alter the effectiveness of the Moderna mRNA vaccine. The monitoring, collection and analysis of data on new variants and their impact on the effectiveness of COVID-19 diagnostics, treatments and vaccines continues.

[Susan Calvin]

50. I hope that's right.

I heard none of them was so great with the South African strain.

[grantcart]

55. Radio Lab Podcast on July 30th had a lengthy broadcast supporting this

A Chinese scientist working in the US started working on a new strategy of vaccine that would work on the barbs you see on the outside of the corona tether than targeting the inner DNA.

He performed thousands of tests from 2012 until 2018 when he found the right DNA slip that would regenerate in volume enough to trigger white cell reaction.

In 2018 when he found the key no scientific journal was interested in publishing his paper.

In Jan 2019 when the company he works for got the full DNA sequence from China it only took them 10 minutes to formulate the vaccine, that is why we were able to go into trials so quickly. Moderns doesn't use egg cells, stem cells from fetus or DNA clips from the virus.

When people talk about how miraculous it was to develop this vaccine so quickly they ignore the work of one scientist who spent almost 2000 days doing tedious trial and error to find a solution to the architecture of the virus rather than focusing on the virus.

[Susan Calvin]

57. Well, I hope that's right.

Focusing on the part that latches on does sound like a good idea.

[Susan Calvin]

27. This is one of the major reasons I Won't Go Back.

You can do everything right yourself, but you are also dependent on other people doing right, 100% of the time.

[mfcorey1]

30. 😡

[Liberty Belle]

33. Heartbreaking. We have a relative dying of COVID; he was exposed by a 14-year-old

who was not wearing a mask. A coworker let his unmasked teen come into the kitchen where our relative worked as a cook.

He's been on a ventilator for five weeks and family has been told his lungs are too damaged to survive.

I think schools should be kept closed until all teachers are fully vaccinated, and get aid to parents who have to miss work because of this. If the kids need to make up a semester, it's better than killing their family members, teachers, or teachers' family members.

[FakeNoose]

35. Yes indeed, all educators must be on the priority list

... including school employees who aren't classroom teachers, but do come in contact with the students. That would include your relative who worked as a school cook. This is a tragic example of how children are oblivious or otherwise unconcerned about the dangers of this virus.

[grantcart]

43. sorry to hear about your relative.

[barbtries]

34. the people who killed her husband

should be held accountable imo.

horrifying. give her a hug for me

[BobTheSubgenius]

36. I think that that family's decision to blind-side the school like that is not only horrific,

and detestable on a moral level, I would buy the argument that it reached the level of criminal. How is this not 2nd degree manslaughter?

They KNEW the child was in (presumably) close contact with a sibling that tested positive and was symptomatic, yet sent a loaded and cocked gun to school, knowingly and for their own convenience.

They killed her husband, and it was a foreseeable result. Not him, necessarily, that's obvious, but infecting someone? It seems almost inevitable, and only extreme good fortune would keep everyone from being infected.

They either didn't care, are too stupid to connect huge dots a couple of millimeters apart, or were relying on a what...? 1 in 1000 chance? I guess that falls into the previous possibility - that they are morons.

[iemitsu]

39. This woman had been teaching for 37 years.

She did not have to return to that environment.
She made that choice.
Both my wife and I quit our teaching jobs to avoid that very situation.

[theaocp]

48. That seems a little harsh. N/t

[iemitsu]

51. Perhaps. I had to deal with the same choice and I quit rather than put myself or my loved ones in

that danger.
She knew (like all teachers know that classrooms are germy places) that she could not be safe in that environment and she chose to go anyway. She taught for 37 years. She was vested and could have retired.
Now her husband is dead.
I'm glad I did not pretend that going back into a classroom was safe.
I'm sorry for her but I'm not surprised this happened

[AwakeAtLast]

44. I think she has a legitimate lawsuit

The family that knowingly put others atcrisk should be charged, IMO.

[LAS14]

45. This doesn't sound to me like a reason to slow down the opening...

... of schools. It certainly, certainly sounds like a reason to change protocols for dealing with students like this, who can't be masked, etc. Minimally, daily quick testing, at the beginning of the day.

[demtenjeep]

46. this is why I am off on medical until hubby and I get both vaccines

a 30% loss in pay for two months is nothing compared to dying

[Reader Rabbit]

56. Any teacher could have predicted this: Parents *will* send sick kids to school.

This happens every day of every normal school year. Why would anyone think suddenly parents would *stop* doing it just because it's potentially deadly?

Teachers know this, but no one else will believe us. They think things will magically be different than they have been for decades.