Ads For Sports Fans

[mezame]

Bionic Spotlights? Alien Tape? Manly Bands?

I confess to being a bit dazed and confused. Seriously, WTF? Anyone actually buying, or literally buying this stuff?

[mahatmakanejeeves]

1. I don't watch sports, and I've seen the Manly Bands ads.

They sponsor movies too.

I saw my first Bionic Spotlights ad this morning. I think they were sponsoring one of those old TV shows from decades ago. It was on MeTV.

[mezame]

11. Bionic?

Like the Six Million Dollar Man kind of solar/battery/LCD device?

ULTRON Vacuums! or {insert quantifiable object here}

These are the new iterations on the old Timex/Acme/Vegematic ads. I swear, our current media culture stems from 1960's comic books.

It's all Stan Lee's fault!

[Dave in VA]

2. They're everywhere

not just on sports broadcasts. Mass marketing saturation! They'll move on to sunglasses, opps, done that; flashlights, no already done that; car windshield visors, nope been there done that...

Oh, well.

Maybe pillows?

[mezame]

3. Follow The Money

Pillows...hmmm...this is actually a sinister plot to channel money to string-pullers.

[gibraltar72]

4. The Lawnmower for Manscaping.

[mezame]

5. Mansplaining For Dummies

Oh wait...

[dogknob]

12. I'm so stealing that

[Claire Oh Nette]

6. Tactical Razors

Tactical. Like putting Bridal in front of items to seel at ridiculous mark up to women, tactical is the new mark up for men.

That tactical razor doesn't seem all that different from my lady bic shaver, just sayin'

[KY_EnviroGuy]

7. Don't forget Porter Paint's new manly deodorant!

Available in latex or enamel and your sports team's manly colors......

[mezame]

8. Taint Stains...

...just Patina!

[Iggo]

9. Tactical Sunglasses

Inspired by the goggles that protect our troops.

There’s really no helping anyone sucker enough to buy into that.

[Iggo]

10. In fact, go to Amazon and type "tactical" into the search box.

The fourth item down is a fucking pen.