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It won't be possible to bless homosexual unions... Alternatively you can bless some machine guns. (Original Post) Swede Mar 2021 OP
Brother Maynard! Bring out the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch! ZZenith Mar 2021 #1
wtf Celerity Mar 2021 #2
A couple appear to be Russian Orthodox, not Catholic NickB79 Mar 2021 #5
And Greek Orthodox. Pretty common to see military hardware get blessed out that way. n/t Decoy of Fenris Mar 2021 #6
This is a joke...right? Ka-Dinh Oy Mar 2021 #3
Of course, the Cross was an instrument of death. multigraincracker Mar 2021 #4
What would Jesus do? Xavier Breath Mar 2021 #7

ZZenith

(4,122 posts)
1. Brother Maynard! Bring out the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch!
Fri Mar 19, 2021, 04:33 PM
Mar 2021

King Arthur : Consult the Book of Armaments.
Brother Maynard : Armaments, chapter two, verses nine through twenty-one.
Cleric : [reading] And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs, and sloths, and carp, and anchovies, and orangutans, and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats, and large chu...
Brother Maynard : Skip a bit, Brother...
Cleric : And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it.
Brother Maynard : Amen.
All : Amen.
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