Florida, never change...

[Nexus2]

AKA: Bride of Florida Man

MIAMI STRIPPER ARRESTED FOR SQUIRTING VAGINAL FLUIDS AT POLICE OFFICERS IN SELF-DEFENSE

Britney Simmons, 24, was performing at the Camel Toe strip club when an altercation began between Simmons and several clients at the club.

Miami police were called to intervene and attempted to apprehend Simmons who was highly intoxicated and acting erratically according to the official police report.

Five Miami Police Department officers attempted to place Simmons under arrest but were momentarily indisposed when the lap dancer ejected vaginal fluids towards the officers, temporarily blinding three and injuring two.

[NoMoreRepugs]

1. No words.

[Marie Marie]

2. Wait - what? I don't even know....How...

[Blue_true]

6. She could have peed at the police officers.

That counts as vaginal fluid. According to the news article, looks like she had plenty of liquid inside her at the time.

[bahboo]

3. looks like a deranged Amy Poehler.....

[Blue_true]

5. Sure does. nt

[marble falls]

8. Amy Poehler is deranged. But not in a temporarily blinding sort of way.

[PCIntern]

16. I think that Is an old photo

Of Ms Poehler.

[Blue_true]

4. I guess that I learn something new every day, even when I don't

want to. In a way, impressive feat by the young woman.

[marble falls]

7. She seems pretty OK with it.

[dweller]

9. There were times, in my lustful youth

when I could only dream of such encounters...


✌🏻

[SKKY]

10. Ok, as a 20 Navy Vet, I've been to some shady places...

...but even I would never in a million years walk into a place called "Camel Toe Strip Club". I mean, you walk into a place called the "Camel Toe Strip Club", I think you just have to assume that someone is going to squirt va...um...never mind. You know what I'm saying. It's gross. She's gross. And they're gross for going there.

[Tanuki]

11. That is not a real story. Look at the other "stories" on the website:

https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/

[whathehell]

13. Yes, those are quite something, aren't they?

[dalton99a]

14. +1

[PCIntern]

15. omfg

Gave me laughs this AM. I need them desperately.

Thanks!

[Baked Potato]

12. That site make The Onion look like pre-school!