Meet the introverts who are dreading a return to normal

[Demovictory9]

Meet the introverts who are dreading a return to normal
Roxanne Roberts 15 hrs ago


Everybody can’t wait to return to normal. Except for half the population dreading the return to normal.

During a sad, tragic year, it was introverts who found a silver lining. There was more time alone, more peace and less of the personal and professional pressures they find so draining. The calendar was suddenly, blissfully empty. Life slowed down.


And now we’re returning to the pre-pandemic world, or as close as we can get. Like everyone else, introverts are excited about seeing family and close friends in person, dining in restaurants, traveling and all the other pleasures of a good life. But most are not interested in facing the forced small talk, the big parties, the noisy open offices and all the demands of extroverts who think more is more and introverts should try harder.

“People are saying, ‘I don’t know how I’m going to go back,’ ” says writer and introvert Jenn Granneman.

“It’s like being paroled for a year and then being told, ‘Actually, you’re going back to prison,’ ” says her partner, writer Andre Sólo.

Social scientists correctly predicted that introverts were best suited to weather the stress of the past year. After months of lockdown, the question now is if introverts can teach the rest of us something about moving forward.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/introverts-are-dreading-a-return-to-the-noise-crowds-and-small-talk-of-normal-life/ar-BB1fvovQ

[Arkansas Granny]

1. My son saw this tweet a few days ago. It fits the situation.

Link to tweet

?s=20

Gus Danger Johnson
@Gusbuckets
really bummed that soon i will have to stop cancelling plans "due to covid" and start canceling plans with my usual bag of petty lies
2:10 PM · Mar 30, 2021

[betsuni]

24. This is too true.

[PortTack]

2. This would be me! After a life time of service in nursing, and really enjoying all my very intense

High stress jobs...no more. The noise, the small talk, packed bars, concerts...no thx.

[dweller]

3. NAILED IT !!

😁
https://democraticunderground.com/12372644#post22

✌🏻

[Demovictory9]

4. lol.. you did!!! one year ago!

[ProfessorGAC]

17. You Sure Did

I used the added home time to get back to playing guitar & piano seriously again. And, recording.
Alas, I can't get the device I need to master the recordings to digital because the company that makes them were shut down by.....COVID!

[csziggy]

5. Yes, it certainly is true for me

I have always been an introvert. Also being allergic to fragrances made it pretty much impossible for me to spend time in crowds.

Once a good non-drowsy anti-histamine was invented - I use Zyrtec - I was able to spend time with people but crowds are still uncomfortable for me. I had to work at it but finally got better able to handle going to meetings and sometimes larger gatherings.

Isolating was easy for me, but now I am again unused to being around a lot of people. One of our nephews is getting married in a couple of weeks. My husband is going but I declined. I just am not comfortable getting out around people yet.

I have good excuses to not go - I gained weight over the last year and none of my "good" clothes fit. The wedding is in a very red area (Matt Gaetz's home territory) and I suspect few precautions will be taken. Both my husband and I have had our vaccinations, which is why I will let him go, but I don't want to be exposed myself.

[Aristus]

6. As always, the complexity of human beings allows for exceptions.

I'm a pretty introverted guy. But my job in clinical medicine has made it important for me to get up and go to work every day during the pandemic. I interact with people face-to-masked-face every day. I'm even longing to be able to play pub trivia with my friends again.

Meanwhile, Mrs. Aristus, as extroverted as anyone, had to leave her job as a dental hygienist, the highest-risk profession for contracting COVID-19. Her pre-existing medical conditions make her very vulnerable to infection. After a year of barely leaving the house, she is in no special hurry to get back to the way things were before. She socializes on Zoom nearly every day, and she's basically dreading having to go back to work.

I told her more than once: if she goes back to work, I may apply for a long sabbatical, just so I can get long stretches of introvert-friendly alone-time like she's had since March of last year.

[SWBTATTReg]

7. I agree...although not really an introvert, I am profoundly hard of hearing, so dealing w/

the hearing world is a strain on me, thus, I am more inclined to be more involved w/ things I like, that don't involve the 'hearing world', and I'm fine w/ it...There are tons of things to do, reading, watching Closed Captioned TV, internet sites such as DU, emails w/ close friends/family, etc. The list of things to do is infinite, as we all know.

I had to laugh at my little sister when one time, quite some time ago, she asked me "Don't you get lonely?"

I told her of course not. But I do admit that having a serious loss of hearing is easier to handle if you were born w/ the hearing loss, which I was...versus those that had the hearing and then lost it, due to illness or some other unfortunate event. Of course most of us will lose some hearing as we get older, a small percentage of hearing, thus that's why you see a lot of people get hearing aid(s).

However, thinking that the aids alone will solve one's hearing loss, it's takes much more, to overcome, to handle the loss. One must change their routines somewhat, alert others around them too of their hearing loss(es), allow others to help you if need be. For example, the other day, on my cell phone, I had someone ask me a question and it was very difficult for me to hear their question (I told her to put her telephone headset closer to her mouth so I could hear her better, didn't work), so I asked my other half to lend me their ears, which they did.

I think that this (the isolation) will prove that in fact, there are tons of benefits about spending time w/ one's self, to perhaps discover more about one's self, and to actually shut out the very intrusive world, with its attitude of 'look at me, look at me!' or 'pay attention to me, pay attention to me!' mentality.

[Mme. Defarge]

8. "Oh that magic feeling -

nowhere to go.”

[Hugin]

9. To be frank, personally, my life for the last year has been...

about the same as the last 20 or so. The exceptions being the commute is much shorter and the food is better.

I'm looking forward to the new normal. Maybe, it will give me a chance to reinvent myself.

This is why I resent these assholes screwing up my second chance.

[Hugin]

11. Note: The people I'm referring to screwing up the new normal are...

the covidiot maskholes and antivaccinationists.

I'm kind of fond of the introverts who aren't among us.

A re-read of my original reply revealed there could be a miscommunication.

Damn pronouns!

[tanyev]

10. Yep. We mostly did restaurant takeout before the pandemic,

so a lot more options opened up for us when everyone converted to takeout. I did keep going in to work, so I have had masked and socially distanced contact with my small group of coworkers. We’ve been doing curbside groceries since November. I do look forward to getting back inside and doing that myself and adding back an occasional trip to Trader Joes. That’s about all I miss.

[Tink41]

12. Just received a lecture today!

About how I need to stop isolating once I get my final vaccine next week. NO NO NO!!! I want no part of it. I've lost a huge amount of weight, became way more active, happier once I embraced "the new normal". After the conversation today all I wanted was to get my hands on a sheet cake and devour it.
I've absolutely enjoyed this time and have no desire to go back. Frightened all my hard work will be ruined.

[Hugin]

13. Is there any pressing reason your new found normal...

can't continue?

[Tink41]

19. Yes.

Tremendous pressure and expectation from family. For the last few weeks every convo or encounter it's exclaimed "can't wait to see everyone again" and the parties they are planning. I'm the only one who doesn't respond in kind.
How do you tell people you love and care about that you aren't interested without hurting their feelings?

[Hugin]

22. That is a tough nut.

How to demonstrate affection without mass gatherings?

My family and friends are very clear that my personality is in that sweet spot between a low functioning dictator and a high functioning mad scientist and any push would result in calamity.

Think about this course of action. Take control (continue your control) of your social schedule and avoid the parties. Instead, schedule your own encounters with your loved ones in smaller doses on your terms. I know you care about them and there is a need to be with them, but, isn't a little bit of only you better than you in the background at a party?

[Tink41]

23. Hilarious to your first part

The second has actually been working out pretty well to me. I have seen them all on separate occasions the whole year. Outside and masked of course. But I'm glad you proposed this as a permanent solution. Maybe all introverts should make note, no more large get together's going forward. Small meaningful outings only.

[Hugin]

28. It is important to be honest and open with them...

Explain that you need to be together in a more intimate setting and you'd like to spend your time in that manner.

Also, lay off the sheet cakes. Enjoy the new normal you to the fullest extent, now that you know who you are.

[hunter]

14. Normal sucks.

I've been that way my entire life.

[UTUSN]

15. Bwah! Ain't that the truth! When the thing started we introverts were like, "What's new/different

about this isolation thing?! Welcome to my world!"

[vercetti2021]

16. I was a practicing extrovert before the pandemic

Like I was heavily introverted all my life up until 2018. I got out more, made friends and enjoyed actually being in public. Then the pandemic strikes and I reverted back to wanting nothing to do with anyone and dread leaving my house now

[Generic Brad]

18. Count me in on the dread

I got promoted this past year into a new position with my company. I am secure in my position, but not in my upcoming work environment. Soon I will be expected to be in the office every day, but since I no longer have direct reports, I will be sharing my office with the person who took my old job. I get to use that office only two days a week. The other three days there is not dedicated space for me, but I am still expected to be in the office. On those days I will have to sit among processors in a cube farm wherever there is an open desk that day (Plus it sounds as though I will also have to wear a mask all day too) or set up shop on a table in a public reception area if no one is out. And I am not supposed to be working from home anymore so I can achieve "work-life balance". Yeesh!

I am doing high level, confidential work that requires a lot of concentration and privacy. Now, instead of working 11 hours a day in silence, I will be stuck with an 8 hour day in a noisy environment with no dedicated personal space. And I have been asked to try to plan all my meetings for the two days I have access to my old office -- not possible.

I know everyone is well intentioned. But this has not been thought out and there is no physical space for me. It has me feeling very unsettled.

[FakeNoose]

27. Maybe they'll let you set up an office in the men's room

Hah! That would solve a lot of problems, my friend.

[Generic Brad]

31. Hope I get to keep my red stapler!

[Piasladic]

20. Does this mean I need to get a haircut and bathe every day?

I was getting used to Zoom. The camera may add pounds, but it does wonders for stink and unkempt hair.

[electric_blue68]

21. Having had a seriously introverted friend for the past..

12+ years I've learned about how it can be for her. She posts articles about it on my FB page.

There are people who are ambiverts a mix of extrovert and introvert.

I guess l miight be one of those. Whike definitely more extroverted - I enjoy being in crowds as long as they're not scarily packed in, I enjoy making small talk if I'm alone waiting on a longish line, or in a crowd of people waiting for an event, or to see a well-known in their field, or famous person.

I also enjoy spend time alone thinking about making, then doing art, or artisan jeweiry. I also do knit & crochet at home, and outside. I also love to read.

So yeah, I get the covid blues for a few days every 4 -8+ weeks. It builds up so I do feel eventually isolated.
I also (except in very snowy, icy, or high heat & hunid weather) miss being able to go out, and about in NYC. Always interesting, beautiful to see architecture, greenery in the parks, botanical gardens, big esplanades, people and fashion watching, and special events.

[berniesandersmittens]

25. K&R

[BlueNProud]

26. Dreading return to the office

so much so t h at i m ay start looking at permanent wfh jobs

[eppur_se_muova]

29. Well, I've always thought 'normal' was over-rated. nt

[llmart]

30. I'm slightly more introverted than I am extroverted.

I'm more of a one on one person. I don't like crowds at all and these days even less than I used to. With all the mass shootings and nut job trumpers and nasty people, I'm very content to keep within my small group of acquaintances. I don't have a problem talking with a neighbor for a bit or a person who may be working on my house or a cashier, but I don't really do small talk much.

The pandemic has been a really good excuse to not see people whom you never liked anyway. Because I'm generally a friendly and congenial person with an easy smile, some people get the notion that I want to hang out with them when I really don't.

Being comfortable and content to just be by yourself is an admirable trait and one that will come in handy as you age and your friends and family dwindle down or if you find yourself in the middle of a pandemic.

[Buckeye_Democrat]

32. It's definitely been easier for me.

It's the CRUEL coworkers that I mostly dread. And they're indeed almost always Republicans, and Trump cultists in recent years.

[MerryBlooms]

33. I am a state home health worker, so my routine hasn't changed.

I have always isolated on my days off, exception of a monthly dinner with three close friends, and hosting holiday parties. I am looking forward to taking my sister to the movies, but that's about it. I feel bad for folks who are dreading going back to uncomfortable situations. I get the anxiety. I dealt with a bout of agoraphobia for two years. Our mobile home park lost 2/3 of the home this summer. I am going to try to get with a few of us left on our street and have a little party for Independence Day. So much loss, but the rebuilding has started.

[Arazi]

34. We aren't out of the woods yet. These new variants mean we cant socialize like before

I got the Johnson and Johnson shot so I don't have the same level of immunity.

Even Dr Fauci says we have to limit socializing unless EVERYONE is vaccinated and how will we know that for sure?



Yes, I've been practicing all my "new" excuses. Hell no I'm never going back to the way it was before

[Buckeye_Democrat]

35. Moderna for me, but J&J isn't bad at all.

It still protects people from severe illness, plus it appears to work better against the South African variant.

You're wise to remain cautious, though, and I'll be the same way after my 2nd dose. It's better for us and everyone else Vaccinated people can still get infected, but they have far better protection against hospitalization and death.

[Arazi]

41. I personally got Pfizer but I'm going to tell everyone I got J&J

Introverts are flat out liars like that when we really need to avoid social situations.

#DontCare

[Buckeye_Democrat]

43. Lol! Well, that's better than lying to be a parasite...

... on other people, draining the life out of them.

[misanthrope]

38. I fear Americans are too screwed up to expect those kind of vaccination numbers

There are sizable numbers of citizens who are more than willing to serve as incubators for newer, more deadly variants.

[Arazi]

42. Yup. I think we still have a long time before it will be rude to refuse to gather

While I grieve the death and physical impairment from the Covidiots, I admit their idiocy means I have genuine reasons for avoiding office gatherings and parties etc

[greenjar_01]

36. "Meet the introverts who..."

No thanks.

[misanthrope]

37. Don't worry, we could very well be back in a surge before long

Considering how obstinate and selfish so many Americans are being about vaccinations and precautions, it wouldn't be surprising at all if new variants give us more surges before the summer is over.

[roamer65]

39. The IT workplace has changed permanently.

I’ve already told my boss I am work from home from now on.

If they don’t like it, can me.

They are having a problem filling open positions anyway.

[Silent3]

40. I'm definitely dreading returning to the office, but not so much because I'm an introvert

I had to switch teams at work just after the start of the pandemic, and this new team I'm on is AWFUL about making meetings drag on and on and on...

Being at home, and since we always do voice meetings, not video meetings, I at least have the comfort of being able to relax, work on other things, etc.

I have yet to experience being stuck in a conference room with these people day after day for these meetings.