My boss slapped my hand Tuesday

[XanaDUer2]

you, my DU family, have kindly read and commented on my posts here. Mainly, my toxic job, mental health, and future attempt to get SSDI ( please make it easier to get, Mr Biden. Disabled Americans are counting on you).


Anyway, I was helping her with some PC wires, she told me to watch a service desk, I started moving towards said desk, and she impatiently smacked my left hand. This has never happened in my 25 years of working at various places in my field.

Going up the chain of command or HR will not have a good outcome for me. I've decided to request FMLA third time, in 2.5 weeks. Let the chips fall where they may. I am applying for SSDI and have a lawyer for when I'm turned down.

For my sanity, I need to remove myself from this toxic situation.

[Karadeniz]

1. She's awful!!!!!! All the best in getting rid of her.

[XanaDUer2]

2. I'm nervous about asking for FMLA again

but this tore it for me

[Walleye]

3. You showed remarkable restraint and good sense. I'm Afraid I would've punched her in the 👄

Good luck with your SSDI. A toxic work environment is absolute hell

[XanaDUer2]

4. I was in shock

it's awful

[Walleye]

5. I can certainly understand that

[CurtEastPoint]

6. Yikes. That's horrible. What does this mean? "watch a service desk"

Not that your moving to it deserves a slap.

[XanaDUer2]

10. Hi, Curt

she meant move to a desk to help people. She was assigned there, but moved away to fix a PC. I thought she meant move to the desk in her place, but she meant answer the phone. Not sure why she cared.
EDIT: TYPO

[CurtEastPoint]

46. Oh, OK. I get it. Sorry this happened.

[Joinfortmill]

7. Best of luck. May I add a suggestion:

Write down what occurred, date it, and give it to your attorney. Later, once you are out of the situation, you may want to proceed with a grievance.

[raccoon]

16. And write down who was present at the time. Nt

[XanaDUer2]

18. Thanks. No one, but

I can document whom I told

[Humanist_Activist]

8. Charge her with assault, file a complaint and see where the chips fall...

chances are the company she works for will not put their neck out for an employee who assaults another.

[Lettuce Be]

43. Seriously if she struck you in any way you should report it

[TNNurse]

9. Isn't that actually assault??

[ThatJustHappened]

49. File a Police Report

Get it on the record

Even if the police, HR, and whomever calls it an exaggeration

If you file a report then it is on the record and they cannot:

-- retaliate by firing, demoting, etc
-- refuse a FMLA
-- ignore the entire episode

You may be able to sue for damages.

They may see the light and change their ways.

They may offer you a buyout/severance package.


You must get the law on your side. Hiring an attorney on retainer is a good start. Filing a police report is even better. Ask your attorney about it. They will most likely back you 100% in filing a police report.

Also file an OSHA report. Get the Feds involved.

[Alice Kramden]

11. I thought you meant it figuratively -

Shocking that it was literally a physical strike - that is beyond the beyond!!! No, absolutely - no one should be treated that way. How terrible!

[Buckeyeblue]

12. I would file assault charges against her

And follow that up with a lawsuit. I'm not sure they could do much to you if there was a criminal investigation going on.

[XanaDUer2]

14. I'm hoping to get SSDI

I'm going to try to never go back

[Warpy]

13. Do write her up as you leave for FMLA

That is not how adults treat each other and it's not even a good idea to treat kids that way, unless it's a dangerous item you need to get them away from quickly.

Just who the hell does she think she is?

[XanaDUer2]

15. poor morale, aggression, passive aggression

we got it all at my job

[Warpy]

33. That's why it's good to let them know why

Good luck on your SSD.

[onethatcares]

17. what was the immediate reaction from you and her?

was there any conversation related to what happened like, you saying, "Why did you do that?" "What was that all about?" ?

and what was her response?

[XanaDUer2]

21. I'm embarrassed to say, no

I have a problem with self-esteem and assertiveness. She's a weird person.

[onethatcares]

27. I got nothing except to say

50 years ago I suffered from the same and no one could hear me speak in social situations.

One of my bosses said he couldn't tell what I was saying without leaning forward, so.... on the drive home and on the drive to work
I began to holler "NO". With the windows closed I would yell, "NO". It took a little while but finally I could hear my own voice in meetings with others.

Try it.. It's free and it exercises your vocal chords. Go for it even if you don't have a car or vehicle. If you're doing it in your home and someone asks, just tell them you're practicing lines for a play. Cause that's all life is.

Good luck.

[AllaN01Bear]

19. from someone with years of experience in this realm,( not a ssd ssi legal eagle),

but with lots of experience on the system, always appeal. even if they say not , you have the right to appeal. i tried some of the high priced attorneys and had to appeal every decision myself . they only take first and second attempts only. good thing i had a good local team on the ground and in the trenches fighting for my initial bought. remember , appeal.

[XanaDUer2]

20. thanks

I do plan on appealing. My lawyer said apply online, then, when denied, they step in. He said I'm disabled and his firm will represent me. He also works with my psychiatrist, as in, they don't work in the same office or are colleagues, but the lawyer helped other patients of his

[AllaN01Bear]

44. sounds like you have a good team there . good luck. keep us posted please .

[XanaDUer2]

51. I will thnx nt

[Skittles]

22. she would be minus a hand if she did that to me

I cannot even imagine.

[XanaDUer2]

24. She's gonna freak out when I ask for time off nt

[Celerity]

26. You really need to speak to an attorney.

So sorry you are being mentally and physically abused.

[luckone]

28. well let her freak . Remain the calm one -do not react to her reactions

good luck to you
take care

[Skittles]

34. GOOD

do it

honestly, you should confront her about smacking you - that is ridiculous

[stollen]

55. Yes, because you have asserted yourself

Don't sell yourself short.

I would report her hitting you. Parlay it with why you need time off if you haven't already. She's a bully and needs to be stood up to.

[sprinkleeninow]

23. There's a spirit of ugly contagion going around, looks like.

[XanaDUer2]

25. I've been hearing about improving morale there for years

like rats, we turn on each other

[sprinkleeninow]

38. A neighbor brought something to my attention the other day.

I was 'flag' shamed and 'lawn' shamed.

As a practicing 'Believer', I had to let it go in a spirit of humility.

Unfortunately, it came from someone who is a vet. Plus it's pretty apparent they are MAGA. So I chalked it up to that. You just never know. People become pitted one against another, contentious, thanks to the damage that was and still is given license to do.

[2naSalit]

29. In the application process for SSDI...

From what I learned when I did it, you don't need an attorney until the second denial. After the first, that takes 90 days, you need to ask for a medical review. If you are denied after that, which takes another six months, is when you get an attorney.

Personally, I never had to deal with the second denial because I was granted disability after the six months of waiting. In fact, they called me on a Saturday to tell me so. I didn't need an attorney or go to court to fight for it which people tell me is unusual.

[marble falls]

30. I worked for a woman owner who would poinr her index at me and then roll her hand ...

... and do the 'come here' thing. I quit after the last time, when I was tired, and I had to stop myself from biting that finger.

It's just not worth taking it from anyone.

[yonder]

40. That curled finger come here gesture, more than any other,

including the bird, does it for me. Just doesn't work, never has and I've never been shy about letting whomever know.

[marble falls]

47. I took it for three months or so. It was enough for a lifetime.

[2naSalit]

31. Does your state have a labor board of any kind?

You could file a complaint against her for creating a hostile working environment.

[XanaDUer2]

37. on the 25th I'm requesting fmla nt

[sprinkleeninow]

41. I'm interceding for you to come through this in victory!

May it all be resolved perfectly in your favor! 💛

[XanaDUer2]

52. Thank you! Appreciate it nt

[XanaDUer2]

50. I'm in a red state, so it's probably pointless

[BobTheSubgenius]

32. WHAT???

That is absolutely OUTRAGEOUS behaviour!!! From whom would that be an acceptable act?

If you can't "get them", get out...by all means!

[XanaDUer2]

35. We're short staffed, so she'll be unhappy

when I ask for FMLA

[BobTheSubgenius]

59. Good! She needs all the discomfort and unhappiness you can legally give to her.

[iluvtennis]

36. Get out of there. as soon as you can. I resigned from a job due to toxic work environment and

still got my unemployment as the employment judge who moderated the case ruled in my favor over the company. It was very joyous.

***You can win also*** and get the unemployment to tide you over until you can get SSDI approved.

[XanaDUer2]

39. I have short term disability insurance

and, after 90 days, I'm going for my employer LTD insurance for money while I await ssdi. It's going to be a long haul, but I need to get out of there

[iluvtennis]

42. Excellent plan. Just get out of that toxic environment ASAP - it isn't healthy.

[dsc]

45. It is hard to apply but both my brother and sister got it first time

so I wouldn't necessarily assume it is a no. Good luck in any case.

[XanaDUer2]

48. Thanks, dsc nt

[XanaDUer2]

57. I came to this job with high hopes

been hanging in for a pension

[Laffy Kat]

54. Does your work have CCTV?

Every inch of our clinic except the restrooms and examination rooms is under surveillance. If so, you could have the incidence pulled for review. I'm so sorry that happened to you; what a horrible boss.

[XanaDUer2]

56. We have cameras. A coworker I told mentioned that nt

[AwakeAtLast]

58. Please file a police report.

This person should not be around other employees, especially subordinates!

We're there any witnesses? I'm so sorry this happened to you!

[gldstwmn]

60. Her touching you in any way

is completely unacceptable. I'm so sorry that this happened to you.

[XanaDUer2]

61. Thank you

I took yesterday off due to stress