Gohmert Asks If BLM & Forest Service Can Move Moon's Or Earth's Orbit

[smb]

Link to tweet

"I was informed by the immediate past director of NASA that they found that the Moon’s orbit is changing slightly and so is the Earth’s orbit around the Sun, we know there’s been significant solar flare activities, um, and so, is there anything that the National Forest Service or BLM can do to change the course of the Moon’s orbit or the Earth’s orbit around the Sun? Obviously that would have profound effects on our climate."

[NewHendoLib]

1. let's send him up there to find out

[TheBlackAdder]

26. Come on Louie? You ain't one of those Flat Earthers too? The Sun & Moon revolve around the Earth.

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.

[Turbineguy]

2. It takes some intelligence

to be that stupid.

[bluedigger]

3. Charles Pierce's "Padishah Emperor of the Stupid".

[sop]

4. This dickhead probably thinks the Black Lives Matter movement is that powerful.

[Volaris]

6. I suspect he means Buereau of Land Managment,

But he might actually be dumb enough to get his initials confused and you're correct lol!

[Takket]

31. Haha yeah I was wondering how black lives matter

Got dragged into this but realized later what he meant.

[Yonnie3]

5. Sure, but doing it will distract them from nuking hurricanes

You gotta pick one or the other Gobert.

[GemDigger]

7. A missed opportunity to tell him how wrong and uninformed he really is.

What a disappointing and cowardly response from her.

[TheRickles]

37. Yes, what a missed opportunity! :-(

[Liberal In Texas]

8. Yeee Haw East Texas...here is the moron that you keep electing.

What an embarrassing idiot.

[Buns_of_Fire]

9. Silly congressman. Only Jewish Space Lasers are that powerful. nt

[tanyev]

11. Darn it, one minute too late!

[Buns_of_Fire]

15. I think it's an unintended consequence of the vaccine.

The magnetic properties are beginning to synchronize worldwide thought patterns. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

[tanyev]

10. Oh come on, Louie. That's what the Jewish space lasers are for.

[soothsayer]

12. He's probably one of those jerks who want to blow up the moon

Cuz... tides

[QED]

13. Must be from the Onion...nah just Louie.

Dumbest guy in Congress.

[lastlib]

14. I'm not saying Louis is an idiot.....

but in a battle of smarts, I think the asparagus could take him.

[JHB]

20. And his asparagus is limp and moldy, if I may cast that.

[lastlib]

52. I believe it is within the boundaries of propriety....

...to cast aspersions (or something) toward his asparagus....

...and for good measure:

[Thomas Hurt]

16. Yeah, lets move it closer so it is easier to rake the moon forests...

[Towlie]

17. That would make a perfect opening scene for a post-apocalyptic science fiction movie.

 
←

Like in I Am Legend, where a scientist talks on TV about a lab-created virus to cure cancer, and then the scene shifts to a future where most of mankind is wiped out.

[smb]

18. The Scene

the scene shifts to a future where most of mankind is wiped out

Beginning with a prologue of Gohmert in a lab coat saying, "Hold my beer and watch this!" as he reaches for a big electrical switch.

[AllaN01Bear]

19. gosh, i dont need to fire off my goof gas gun at all they are doing it themselves .

hmm lets see,,

[JHB]

21. Tell you what, Louie. You get us real Eagle transporters and Moonbase Alpha...

...and we'll see what we can do about shifting orbits.

[lame54]

22. Look at Louie talking al sciency

[Midnight Writer]

23. Don't worry. Louie. Jeff Bezos is flying up there to take care of business.

He's flying to Krypton to pick up a SuperBaby who should easily be able to move the Earth and Moon.

[LetMyPeopleVote]

24. Louie is an idiot

[wyn borkins]

25. Believe It OR Not: Louis Buller Gohmert Jr. is an attorney and a former judge

Turbineguy (just above) is right; it does take some (very little bit of) intelligence to be that durn stupid.

[peggysue2]

27. Hahahaha

Louie must have taken those comments right out of Trump's science notes, the collection that suggested injecting bleach would cure Covid.

I thought sure this was snark coming from Gohmert but he says it all in a perfectly serious manner. Maybe he's trying to goad the press, make himself a headline. If not, he should be a standup comic.

Aspersions on my asparagus and all that!

[dalton99a]

28. Class president, Texas A&M University. Baylor Law School.

And still denser than a rock.

[rurallib]

30. did his dad have a beer distributorship or something?

[dalton99a]

33. No, he was an architect

who had his own architectural firm

[rurallib]

29. Great restraint by the BLM nominee for not busting out laughing

[Takket]

32. Why did the woman say she would have to get back to him?

Instead of just saying no? That was kind of weird. She knows the answer.

[Disaffected]

34. I suspect

she possibly (probably?) did not. OTOH, she may have been simply rendered speechless by the sheer stupidity of the question.

[rickford66]

36. Like replying to a road rage incident.

Be polite .... ya never know.

[11 Bravo]

35. I need some asparagus. STAT!

[sarchasm]

44. lol! good one! ... I had to look that up.

... lest we cast aspersions on someone's asparagus.

[Layzeebeaver]

38. nut job

more more need be said

[Disaffected]

39. While it is technologically feasible

for humans to alter the earth's orbit to a degree significant enough to alter climate, such a feat remains far far into the future.

It would basically involve altering the orbits of near-earth passing asteroids to pass v closely to earth and in a direction that would tend to increase the earth's distance to the sun. This would have to be repeated many thousands of times to make a difference but has been seriously proposed as a way to mitigate not human caused climate warming but to alleviate the effect of sun gradually increasing in solar output that, in millions of years, will cook the planet.

Not that any of that of course has anything at all to do with what the Bureau of Land Management could do....

[smb]

40. Somebody Should Tell Gohmert To Jump Up And Down At Noon Every Day...

...to push the earth further from the sun. He'd be dumb enough to do it.

[Disaffected]

48. Heh,

there was at at least semi-serious proposal years ago IIRC that if everyone in China could stand on a stool and jump off at the same time and do that repeatedly in a closely synchronized manner, that a giant earthquake would occur on the opposite side of the world. This could supposedly be utilized as a weapon of war.

[Delarage]

57. Probably easier

To shift to solar and wind and use green building principles.

[Disaffected]

61. True for the first few million years or so

but ultimately something much more drastic will be required (if intelligent life even exists on earth at that point which seems doubtful).

[marble falls]

41. Sure, Louie, not only that but we've built a lunar steering wheel. We're going to fly you to the ...

Moon so's you can have the honor of driving it!"

[Vinca]

42. Here's what we do, Louie. All the people and animals on earth will move to one small

section of the planet and then we'll jump up and down and see if that works.

[Traildogbob]

43. Well, he found us out.

As a 30 year college faculty retiree, we found out that the more extremely tall trees we grow, the more friction we cause on earths orbit. It’s a tree hugging, hippie, far left plan to get closer to the sun for more sunshine for pot growing and prettier frisbee throwing days. Cold winters make it hard to get weed for too many months. We got BLM groups to help plant trees to help because black people love warmer climates. It’s genetically positive for them.
Pot smoking surfers benefit with moon orbit changes.
But Loui, that’s science, MTG calls it lies. And can’t the all mighty God stop us from screwing with his perfectly balanced rotation of his planets. Are ya saying blacks and Foresters are more powerful than the Sky Ghost?

[Mr. Sparkle]

45. Dear God. If stupid was a disease

Half of the republican party would be dead right now

[CoopersDad]

46. I'd say BLM would be the better agency to do this, not Forest Service

Bureau of Land Management?

"Land Management", Duh.

[Jilly_in_VA]

47. Louie the Dumbster

He probably thinks "Spaceballs" was real science.

[cbabe]

49. Life as we knew it by

Susan Beth Pfeffer. Young adult novel. Asteroid smashes into moon changing its orbit.

Thanks for the laughs. Put me on the floorx3.

[bedazzled]

50. he seems to be admitting that climate change is a problem

that surprises me somewhat

still stupid though

[VGNonly]

51. Nuke those suckers!

[bluewater]

53. K&R

[JohnnyRingo]

54. Yep! The moon was twice as far away when I was born

That's why the climate is changing so fast.
Pretty soon we'll be able to see the MTV flag.

Talk about completely missing the point. The NASA head was trying to make Louis understand how a dynamic Cosmos changes over billions of years, and he thought it was a lesson in 100 years of climate change.

Please Texas. Can't you find some drunk at the end of the rodeo saloon to run for Congress? Someone who isn't drooling down their shirt?

[Tikki]

55. Someone needs to ask him why his buddy trump didn't already do this.

Tikki

[eppur_se_muova]

56. I hope someone explained, in deadpan, that would lie well outside the Forest Service's remit. nt

[Delarage]

58. Does anyone ever run against him?

WTF. Just run a constant loop of this shit and say "Vote for me: I'm not a fucking moron"

[scarytomcat]

59. rethugs always looking for better spin

[tavernier]

60. I thought he did mean BLM and was being sarcastic.

But then I remembered who was talking.

[COL Mustard]

62. What Did Mark Twain Say?

If I were an idiot, and if I were a Member of Congress....but I repeat myself.

This is on an order with Hank Johnson a few years back who asked if Guam was going to tip over if we based more troops there.

[LetMyPeopleVote]

63. For this thread

Link to tweet