The aliens are real. Their spaceships are real. They are on a mission.

[skip fox]

Last edited Fri Jun 25, 2021, 07:41 PM - Edit history (1)

Obviously U.F.O.s are alien space ships carrying graduate students from this galaxy working on Master's theses and Ph.D. dissertations.

Master's students have the triangle ships while their Ph.D. counterparts have the tic-toc shaped ships

They started coming regularly in the 19th century, but really ramped up their studies when post-industrial societies with nuclear weapons appeared beginning in the late 1940s.

There are liberal arts students, folklore students, economic students, history-of-science students, etc., but the most active are the history and political science students who have hypotheses about the sustainability of post-industrial societies.

They don't contact us because that would pollute their experiments and their experiments may provide them the enlightenment to avoid what looks like will be our fate.

Understand now?

[FreepFryer]

1. This hits hard (Nt)

[Layzeebeaver]

2. Nope.

Makes no sense other than sarcasm.

[skip fox]

13. Satire is one tyope of joke, but thereare many paths to humor.

[lunatica]

3. I remember some aliens when I was in college

Most of them hung out in the bars. Noisy bunch.

[Lovie777]

4. Sounds like Qanon . ... LOL

My first thought when I read the title - "To Serve Man" The Twilight Zone 1962

[DBoon]

8. actually reminded me of Scientology

Scientology followers believe that a human is an immortal, spiritual being (Thetan) that is resident in a physical body. The Thetan has had innumerable past lives and it is observed in advanced (and – within the movement – secret) Scientology texts that lives preceding the Thetan's arrival on Earth were lived in extraterrestrial cultures. Scientology doctrine states that any Scientologist undergoing "auditing" will eventually come across and recount a common series of events.[26] Part of these events include reference to an extraterrestrial life-form called Xenu. The secret Scientology texts say this was a ruler of a confederation of planets 70 million years ago, who brought billions of alien beings to Earth and then killed them with thermonuclear weapons. Despite being kept secret from most followers, this forms the central mythological framework of Scientology's ostensible soteriology – attainment of the state known as "clear". These aspects have become the subject of popular ridicule

From Wikipedia

[BannonsLiver]

5. Everyone knows the aliens are here to start panicked and doomy Delta variant threads on DU.

[DBoon]

6. work this up into a short story

might work

[TreasonousBastard]

7. But do they have the Prime Directive? Or are they here to...

fatten us up?

[Xavier Breath]

24. If fattening us up was their goal

then I'd say kudos and mission accomplished.

[Brother Buzz]

9. Hell, I'd go if they came down and got me

Hell, I'd go
If they came down and got me
They could be little green men, yeah
That wouldn't stop me
Buzzin' through the galaxy
Who could beat a ride for free?

For all I know I'm just the perfect fellow
Not too white, not too yellow
Get me on that big space ship
This could be my hippest trip!

Hey you, UFO guy
Put me first on standby
I'm traveling light, my attitude's right

I've seen that night
Don't call me crazy
They were in the sky
Lookin' quite amazin'
Doin' figure 8s around the moon

Count me in
I ain't no hesitater
I'll ride aboard
And write home later
Say: "How you folks at home?
I just got the bug to roam!"

Hey you, UFO guy
How you make that thing fly?
Say, I won't tell, I won't say a thing

Aloha, Saturn
Aurora Borealis
We'll hit 'em all
We'll land in Dallas
There'll be a big parade for me

I'll make the news, just wait and see
I'll tell 'em about my galactic flight
We was buzzin' left and whizzin' right
So put your brakes on where you be
And plunk that saucer down by me

Hey you, skinny space man
Can't you see that I'm on the lam?
Come on, you flyin' saucer
Make me an offer
I'll book the flight
The time is right

I got my bags
And I got my shots
So come on, shorty
Read my thoughts!

[Baitball Blogger]

10. The Mothership won't allow me to confirm nor deny.

[ProfessorGAC]

14. There's Two Motherships?

There goes the neighborhood!

[chowder66]

11. If Earth could speak it would say that we humans are the aliens who have come to destroy. nt

[PoliticAverse]

12. I actually had the "graduate students doing research theory" but I assumed what they were doing

was using time machines to come back and study past civilizations.

[skip fox]

23. I think I've been scooped.

[Biophilic]

15. Thanks, gave me a laugh. nt

[Dream Girl]

16. So they're anthropologists.

If they’re simply here to study and observehuman culture that must be wat they’re studying.

[Triloon]

17. Enjoy your laugh, but

whatever these phenomenon might be they are not, according to the Director of National Intelligence's report today, a joke.
https://www.dni.gov/files/ODNI/documents/assessments/Prelimary-Assessment-UAP-20210625.pdf

These observations, mostly from the US Navy, of the bizarre "impossible" movements in these sightings are well aligned with the thousands of reports from citizen observers over many decades.
This is a partial validation of the goofball lunatic ufo cranks that I haven't seen anyone mention.

There is no harm in finding a laugh in it all, but there is more going on than anyone can explain yet.

[skip fox]

22. My int ent was not to undercut investigations. It was just a joke.

[msfiddlestix]

18. I feel much more enlightened now. Thank You!

I have avoided opening every single "alien and ufo" post since they started appearing on this site. Even saw headers indicating this was being debated and discussed on mainstream media, which included Pentagon officials and Military Officers. Sort of made me tempted to open one of those and read it to figure out what the hell is going with this surge of ufo interests.

But after successfully resisting each one of those posts, your header did me in. I had click, couldn't help myself.

And now I understand why.

[niyad]

19. darn it. You were not supposed to tell. Now I have to contact High Command. And the

dean. Sheeeesh. Paperwork.. .

[Trueblue1968]

20. one thing you said wrong. THEY HAVE BEEN COMING FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS.

Ezekiel saw a wheel, way up in the middle of the sky ..... That "wheel" they talk about in Biblical times was a UFO. Our founding Fathers saw UFOs. Our Native Americans saw tons of space ships. the People's in Europe, Mexico, South America saw them. Maybe like Admiral Byrd said .... they are in hollow tunnels in the snowy areas of the north and south pole !!!!

[skip fox]

21. These were the dissertation chairs and graduate deans

waiting to give the go-head.

[Xavier Breath]

25. What's their student loan situation like?

Hopefully their default rates are low.

[hunter]

26. Sorry folks. They have no interest in humans. None at all.

Most of them are here to study beetles.



https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beetle

[skip fox]

27. While it is true that entomology students have outpaced their peers and now

comprise over 72% of alien graduate students, and while it is true that beetles are over twelve times smarter than humans and twenty times more interesting, diversity requirements mandate that at least 25% of the students come from non-scientific (narrowly defined) disciplines. Over 450,000 Milky Way universities have signed the agreement.

[hunter]

29. Imagine the plight of the poor grad student who really wants to study earth's beetles...

... but can't get accepted to any program doing field work here.

So dey cook up a scheme to study The Beatles...



"Hey mom and dad! I'm going to Earth to study, as those disgusting humans say, beetles!"

"We're so proud of you, kid. You're going to be a great entomologist someday!"

[dalton99a]

28. Dumbasses are trying to determine how humans procreate

It's hard to see from above. They should go lower