How Tucker Stopped Worrying About Being Bad At Phonics And Just Became Racist Instead

[Nevilledog]

Link to tweet

https://www.wonkette.com/how-tucker-carlson-stopped-worrying-about-being-bad-at-phonics-and-just-became-racist-instead

Hoo boy, the Washington Post is out with a long-read about "Tucker Carlson: Why?" You actually will want to read it. It's an in-depth examination of how some stupid white Little Lord Fauntleroy frozen dinner hellboy heir from La Jolla, California, became the 52-year-old white nationalist piece of shit he is today.

You see, it started with his first-grade teacher, Mrs. Raymond, who scarred him for life or something. He apparently wrote about this in his 2018 book, but we're pretty sure if we sent you on a scavenger hunt to find somebody who read that book, you'd give up and start day-drinking because fuck that, who wants to search for some pig that actually reads Tucker Carlson's books.

Anyway, Mrs. Raymond! Tucker says she was very mean and liberal and cried too much and was bad at teaching him phonics. He HATED Mrs. Raymond. He hated Mrs. Raymond so much he wrote about her in his 2018 book, when he was 49 years old. He hated her hated her hated hated her HATDE HR HARTTED HRRRRRR AHTED HERRTTR! (That's how Tucker might have written it, because apparently he was bad at phonics.)

He attended the elite La Jolla Country Day School, where a woman entered his life whom he grew to detest. It was his first-grade teacher, whom he referred to in his book as Mrs. Raymond. He caricatured her as "a parody of earth-mother liberalism" who "wore long Indian-print skirts. . . . She had little interest in conventional academic topics, like reading and penmanship." He recalled her sobbing theatrically at her desk, saying, "The world is so unfair! You don't know that yet. But you'll find out!"

*snip*

[orwell]

1. Him and Hannity...

...leaders in the "Most Punchable Face" contest.

[lagomorph777]

2. Definitely. I think any teacher can completely warp kids' minds with their fashion choices.

Although, TBH, I remember a couple of them in high school whose fashions revved up my imagination...

[Walleye]

3. Now, it's confirmed, he really is as dumb as he looks

Hey Tucker. I knew how to read at least a year before I started school. My older brother taught me he was in a public school.

[msfiddlestix]

4. hmm. What to say about this pathetic white privileged ass clown freak occupying America airwaves?

it just never ends. what's it gonna take to get these freaks off the air I wonder?

[gratuitous]

5. In first grade he already needed a private tutor?

Was the curriculum too advanced for Mummy and Daddy to explain it to him? Or were they trying to avoid the risk of having to learn their little sprog's name?

[11 Bravo]

7. Guess who Mommy and Daddy hired to tutor the little shit.

You got it. According to the 77 year old former teacher it was Mrs. Raymond herself!

That kind of puts the lie to Tuckums' bullshit.

[Thomas Hurt]

6. If this were true, which I question, what kind of emotionally stunted loser do you have to be...

to still hate your first grade teacher. Not to mention that it is highly unlikely that his 1st grade self knew what liberal meant.

[czarjak]

8. She pegged him and he knows it.