I was taught to say please and thank you.

[Texaswitchy]

Respect my elders.

Hold doors for people.

Just to be a decent person.

Yesterday at the grocery store there was a old couple trying to unload their groceries into their car.

They were having a hard time.

I stopped to help.

No big deal.

A lot of younger people passed them by.

It didn't take but a few minutes to help.

The couple just kept thanking me but it wasn't necessary.

[FalloutShelter]

1. Yep! me too.

Perform random acts of kindness.

[Tadpole Raisin]

49. Coming back to this thread and looking

at all the responses to this post I am feeling a little bit better today seeing how everyone here views acts of kindness and consideration to be the proper way to be.

To spontaneously just do the right thing and help another human being because you were raised that way and it is automatic now.

A smile, a thank you. Doesn’t seem like much does it? But it is.

And kindness is free.

Thank you Texaswitchy, FalloutShelter, and everyone else posting here and the DU community.

[meadowlander]

51. What goes around, comes around.

My first week of college back in the 90s I noticed an elderly man trying to go down a flight of stairs with no banister. His whole body was trembling and he was trying to grasp at some fern fronds and tree branches at the side of the stairs for balance. Dozens of students were streaming past him ignoring him but I stopped and offered him my arm down the rest of the stairs.

Turns out he was a professor in my department. We had a very interesting conversation about Yeats going down the stairs and then the rest of the way to his office and when I ended up in his class a few years later I rocked an A+ with not much effort.

You never know what you're going to get yourself when you make time for people.

[Wounded Bear]

2. The world definitely needs more of that...

[Texaswitchy]

3. A little kindness goes a long way.

Even with all the crap going on reach out and be a decent person.

[MineralMan]

4. So was I.

If I can help, I offer to.

We just moved into a townhome that is part of a quad home. My side neighbor is gone all day, as is his wife. The first week I was here, I noticed that on trash pickup day. I'm at home all the time, except for shopping trips, etc. So, after the trash truck left, I moved both my wheelie bin and his back up the driveway. We've been here three weeks, so I've done it three times.

Yesterday, my neighbor came out when I was outside and thanked me. "You don't have to do that, but thank you," he said. I just said, "No problem. I'm down there bringing mine back. It's no trouble to bring yours back, too, if you're not home."

Simple, polite, and neighborly things to do should always be done. It's just the right thing to do.

I look for opportunities to help. That's how I was raised by my parents.

[Texaswitchy]

5. Parents and teachers.

My mother would send me across the street to help out out the elder neighbor lady.

Whatever she needed.

My mother said one day you will be old.

We were raised right.

[MineralMan]

7. Yes, we were. And so are many kids today.

We were lucky to have been taught those things. However, even people in our own generation were not all taught those rules.

Your mother was right. We will all be old someday, if we are lucky. Or, we may all be less able in some way than we were. Helping people just makes good sense.

[stopdiggin]

8. the one thing about that post

was the reference to 'younger people.' Plenty of people my own age (or greater) wouldn't be bothered to cross the street .. as the saying goes. Bet there were plenty of middle aged and older people that 'walked by' in exactly the same setting.

That said - Thank you to all of you that are still making an effort, and still practicing basic decency. Kudos.

[Texaswitchy]

10. You are right about older people be rude.

Younger people have a little more strength.

I am 67.

The couple were a lot older then me.

[Texaswitchy]

9. My neighbor would have been in home without the neighbors helping.

We all looked out for her.

She able to pass away at home.

My mother would handle her bills and wash her clothes.

She was invited to dinner by neighbors.

Her name was Mrs. Valentine.

She was in her late 70's at that time.

[appalachiablue]

28. You were raised right, 'there but for the

grace of God go I,' as my dad said. Helping, caring and having empathy for others was taught to us since childhood. It strengthens the bonds of community. Selfish and toxic individualism, espoused by the extreme right is on the rise but will never work long term, it destroys societies as we see. More compassion and caring are needed, especially for the vulnerable- those who are aging, disabled, disadvantaged or young. Please and thank you are also important, despite how they're mocked by some as 'southern' customs.

[Texaswitchy]

32. Please and thank you will get you a long way.

We all need help at sometimes.

[LakeArenal]

6. Same way up in Yankee country.

[twodogsbarking]

11. When you do these things people are surprised.

Interesting, eh.

[Texaswitchy]

12. The couple were surprised.

Should not be.

[Tadpole Raisin]

13. Yup, me too!

One of my favorites is holding a door for someone and they walk right through.

If I’m not in a good mood I might say loudly “You’re welcome!”

Driving and stopping to let someone cross the street (in the X-walk or any place else). All I would appreciate is for them to look up and nod the head or wave the hand. Mostly ignored.

I’m also not surprised at those who never look up or - you know, that old fashioned thing your parents taught you - to look both ways.

Aren’t there some places that paint signs on the sidewalk now to look up?

Crazy!

[Texaswitchy]

17. I like holding doors for people if they need help.

Looking both ways and a simple wave.

I almost hit some guy on his phone.

Not looking just texting.

[Tree Lady]

33. Or letting someone only buying a few things

Go ahead in line at grocery store. Most people are surprised by kindness. I always say something like I am retired I have lots of time, as most young people are rushing around.

[Texaswitchy]

35. That is a nice thing to do.

We were at Whataburger and the man behind us paid for our order.

We did the same thing later.

Pay it forward.

[Tree Lady]

44. With all the fear and anxiety these days

We need kindness. Last night walking my dog after dark on a warm summer night, I met a neighbor 6 blocks away my age walking her dog. She was so friendly and nice it was like a being covered by a warm blanket on a cold day.

I walked away feeling much better.

[elleng]

14. Thanks.

Glad to say, I hear kindness often, offers to help with groceries in parking lot. (HOWEVER, aside from appreciating the kindness, doesn't make me happy to have folks affirm that I appear old; I don't feel old.)

[Texaswitchy]

19. I am 67.

I am old, some how made it.

Still in good shape but will take help.

We have two new dogs and was buying a big sack of dog food.

Some young guy help me load the sack of dog food.

He was raised right.

[elleng]

24. Big sacks of dog food require help!

I'm 76, OK shape but have a couple features that may appear to need help.

[YoshidaYui]

15. Try growing up in an Asian family

That is steeped in tradition for thousands of years.

[sagetea]

83. As is with

the Native American culture. You respect, help, protect your Elders. It's just what you do.

sage

[YoshidaYui]

84. Yup

Same with us Native Hawaiians!

[calimary]

16. It just takes such a little extra effort.

Thanks so much for doing that!

[Delmette2.0]

18. When I was still coming out of the last of anesthesia after surgery

I kept telling the nurses who came in to check on me "Thank you." I only know this because my sister told me, I don't remember.

Some things are just ingrained. Thanks Mom.

[Texaswitchy]

22. Same here.

Please and thank you.

Our teachers at school were a big part of it.

[Delmette2.0]

30. .....

[Lonestarblue]

20. I've long been annoyed by the right's disdain for political correctness because

much of political correctness is simply good manners, consideration for others, and minding your own business. Those qualities seem to be in short supply among many people today, more so after Trump gave permission to his followers to do and say anything they want.

[Texaswitchy]

27. Yes

Exactly.

[ripcord]

21. I remember when I was younger

I took my mom grocery shopping and an older lady was having trouble getting something off the top shelf so I naturally grabbed it for her. My mother looked at me, smiled and said "maybe I raised you right regardless of what everyone says".

[Texaswitchy]

25. She did a good job.

Parents are powerful people.

[Mickju]

23. I was brought up that way too.

At 77 I still try to help people when I can. I can still hear my mother telling me how to act.

[Texaswitchy]

26. My parents were respected in the neighborhood.

They were active in the civic club, PTA, little league, and the scouts.

They were good role models.

[AllaN01Bear]

29. ive been taught same. a while ago, a friend of mine asked me if being polite

was hard. immideate response , yes . but he didnt want me to become a rude dude . ive noticed that its my generation and younger who are rude and id just love to kabong them with my fist , but id better not, wouldnt want to be wearing prision stripes . so, i just hang in there . i opend the back door of a crew cab for a guy so he could put in a bag of ice . i dont do it for the gratification , but just because .

[Texaswitchy]

31. Yes.

It is the act of doing.

It feels good.

[not a texan]

34. I like the dance by the door

I am an older male and try to get to a door first to open it for a woman. I am old enough that now many women are trying to hurry to open the door for an old man. Good for some laughs

[barbtries]

40. i'm an older feminist

and all for whoever gets to the door first holds it for the next.

[niyad]

52. Exactly. Especially if the other person has parcels, etc.

[summer_in_TX]

73. When I was a silly young feminist, I'd bristle when someone politely held the door

for me. I somehow latched onto a wacky notion that it was a way of indicating the thought that I was helpless and unable to do for myself.

Luckily that I wised up soon after in listening to my then-boyfriend tell stories of his mother making sure her boys were helpful to others. I could tell he got pleasure from being helpful, and then realized so did I. (My mom wasn't as systematic about teaching us that, but her mom did.)

Manners and kindness make the world a better place. As does giving others the benefit of the doubt, and withholding judgment.

When I was a teacher, my students and I worked to live up to the rule that the world had more than enough bad and sad in it, and that we'd try not to add any more. I think more often than not we succeeded.

By the way the "boyfriend" and I will celebrate our 44th wedding anniversary on Friday. He still gets joy from helping others, me included. I'm blessed.

[niyad]

74. awwwww. Wishing you a very happy anniversary.

[summer_in_TX]

86. Thank you, nicad!

[Joinfortmill]

36. Very nice

[secondwind]

37. Same here, and it's been passed on to my daughter and

22 yr old granddaughter. 🥰

[Texaswitchy]

38. Good manners never get old.

Compassion.

You never know when you need help.

[barbtries]

39. me too, and raised my children the same way.

Courtesy, good manners don't hurt, you know? I can't figure out why so many people seem to find them annoying, at least when it comes to extending them to others.

[Texaswitchy]

42. Me either.

I grow up in a little neighborhood.

Everybody knew everybody.

We looked out for each other.

I miss that.

[yellowdogintexas]

41. I'm Southern and certain things were just expected of us

Please, thank you, you're welcome of course.

Two things I quickly noticed when I lived in Other Places.

Nobody said "Yes Ma'am or Yes Sir" to older folks or persons of authority. We were heavily drilled in that (even my dad who could occasionally show a prejudiced side) would call us out immediately if we did not say it to anyone older (i.e. over 10 years our senior) whether black, white or something else. He would also call us out if we referred to someone by their first name "What do you mean calling her Annette instead of 'Miss Annette')?" She told me to, Daddy; she said it made her feel old!

The other was Bereavement Food. Deaths would trigger an onslaught of casseroles, desserts, roasted chicken, barbeque etc. If someone had surgery or a very ill family member. all the women would conference to get a meal together for the family. My mom always had the ingredients for her favorite casserole ready to go and she could whip up a pie faster than you could skin a cat.

(suggested reading; 'Being Dead Is No Excuse" It's all about this custom in southern Alabama with some hilarious stories and delicious recipes.)

the basic kindnesses of life. One of my close church friends says that she can't imagine how people who do not have an anchor group in their lives make it through the dark times. Ours are our SundaySchool class and our UMW Circle. It always takes a village.

[Texaswitchy]

43. Yes.

We had all of that growing up.

It was a nice way to grow up.

Common courtesy.

Compassion.

Kindness.

I have a little block here like that.

We are a tight group.

[Midnight Writer]

45. Captain Kangaroo said it every day. "Always remember the magic words; Please and Thank You"

[Texaswitchy]

47. I remember that.

Good Captain and Mr. Green Jeans.

Magic words.

Still works.

[twodogsbarking]

80. The Banana Man was my favorite.

I watched the very first show on black and snowy TV.

[Progressive Jones]

46. Same here. Thank You for posting this. nt

[niyad]

48. The way we were reared, these acts come automatically and naturally.

A smile and, "how are you doing today?"

can I take that cart for you? Can I help with those groceries? (A bit selfish, because I get the cart!)

Let me get the door.

Can I get that item on the upper shelf for you? To those in the mobility carts.

Go ahead of me, you only have a few items. Or, go ahead of me, you are working, and .I am not.

Thank you. To each and every person who assists me-clerks, staff, whoever.

Putting newspapers actually at the front door when I am out walking early in the morning.

Basically just being mindful. The Golden Rule.

[meadowlander]

50. Can I be an old grump about young people clogging up the priority seating on busses?

Drives me batshit. There are actual signs posted telling them not to sit there or to give up their seats.

As a life-long public transport patron, you would almost never see this thirty years ago but now it seems to be the rule rather than the exception.

I honestly think we're in a crisis of parenting the US. Too many people raised by Fox News and not much else to think that basic politeness and consideration for other people makes you a radical leftist terrorist.

[Jedi Guy]

54. "I honestly think we're in a crisis of parenting the US."

Yep, we are. The problem is that too many people want to be their child's friend rather than their parent. They don't want to be the bad guy by applying corrective discipline when and where needed. It's easier on them that way, you see.

Or you have the "helicopter parents" who hover over their kids and obsess over their lives, doing everything possible to ensure that their kid never faces any sort of challenge or adversity.

The end result is that we have adults who are self-centered, entitled, and believe they should have/do whatever they want simply because they want it. Or we have adults who have never had to overcome a challenge and aren't able to function in situations that they find less than ideal. Both types simply aren't prepared to deal with reality, and the blame lies with their parents.

There are plenty of other issues that arise from poor parenting, but those are the two that spring to mind most readily. I really don't think it has a lot to do with politics, honestly. Shitty parents can be found all over the ideological spectrum.

[Jedi Guy]

53. It's sad that people are surprised by small acts of kindness, isn't it?

Some years ago my wife and I were carrying groceries out to our car, and not far from us an old fella was loading his groceries into his car. One of the bags ripped, and canned goods went rolling under his car. I took off my button-up shirt and crawled under his car to retrieve the cans. Once I had them all, I helped him load the rest in. He kept thanking me over and over again, and I told him no thanks was needed. When I got back to my wife, she just smiled and said, "I got a good one."

I still remember the helpless "oh shit" look on his face when the bag ripped, and I also remember all the people in the parking lot who just ignored him. All it cost me to help him was a few minutes and a dirty t-shirt, but evidently no one else nearby could be bothered.

[Skittles]

55. I don't find the younger people necessarily do not care

I do think they are more prone to believing people will ask for help if they need help.

[Texaswitchy]

56. We raised by different generations.

My parents were born in the 1920's.

Farm kids.

The depression and WW2.

My grandparents born in 1890's.

Different life's.

[Skittles]

57. my dad was Depression era, my mum survived WWII as a child in England

I was raised by a generation that didn't just think bad things could happen, they KNEW they could

[Texaswitchy]

58. My mother never went hungry but my father did.

My grandfather lost everything and they to hit the road.

Road kill was popular back then.

My father hated camping.

[Mariana]

65. Sometimes they are treated very rudely when they do try to help someone older.

My daughter works in a supermarket, and she's been told off by old people for offering to help them load up their groceries. Of course, they are the exception - most of them graciously accept or politely say no thank you.

Also, she says that in general, the very rudest customers by far where she works are those who proudly wear Trump merch, almost all of whom are over 50.

[Skittles]

69. yes

that will make them shy off from offering assistance

I too have noticed that the rudest folk I see tend to be middle-aged (no doubt they are Trump humpers too)

[sheshe2]

77. Well some do, sometimes.

New neighbor coming home from work, night shift. I was on the stairs shoveling snow, so I could make it downstairs to to my sisters house to take care of my 94 yr old mom. She yelled to me to go back inside, she would take care of it.

I said no, she insisted.

[sheshe2]

78. Well some do, sometimes.

New neighbor coming home from work, night shift. I was on the stairs shoveling snow, so I could make it downstairs to to my sisters house to take care of my 94 yr old mom. She yelled to me to go back inside, she would take care of it.

I said no, she insisted.

[Piasladic]

59. and I benefited

I locked my keys in my car. A nice couple drove me to a friend's place, and I was able to call my husband. This was before cell phones.

Now, I look for ways to repay that gift.

[PJMcK]

60. Well, it's not the young people's fault if they aren't empathetic

One could blame their parents. Interestingly, doing the rough math of the OP, the parents of these young people would be the children of the generation of the people who needed some help.

So, which generation didn't teach the proper lessons?

[Texaswitchy]

67. My sister has two kids who are total jerks.

My two adopted grandchildren used to visit a senior care home before the virus.

Their idea.

I was the youngest so I had a different life.

The older kids were gone already by the time I was 10.

I was around my parents alot.

[Mr.Bill]

61. The sad thing about today's world

is those elderly people would have every right to be wary you were going to do something to take advantage of them. Good for you for helping them. A side benefit is maybe not only did you help them with that task in the moment, it might have also made them feel better about people in general.

[Texaswitchy]

62. I approached them very carefully..

Talked to them first.

The world is different now.

The couple was fragile, someone should have been with them.

[Mr.Bill]

64. Sounds like you handled it well.

Nice going.

[Texaswitchy]

63. I just hope they had some help at home.

They had stocked up.

[Mr.Bill]

66. Us old people tend to stock up.

Our freezer and pantry look like we're getting ready to hunker down for six months.

[Texaswitchy]

68. Me to.

Not a bad idea right now.

[Roy Rolling]

70. Well done, my friend

I’ve been somewhat successful later in business as a specialized consultant. Having expertise can sometimes be found on the Internet, but I attribute any success to a charitable spirit and my business motto:

Being polite doesn’t cost anything, but being an asshole is very expensive

[BigmanPigman]

71. I taught my 1st graders to say please, thank you

and to wait their turn (no cuts). The cafeteria workers told me they could always tell which students were from my class. I think they got into a good habit since they apparently continued to be polite after they moved on to the higher grades. It is the little things that matter. My students ALWAYS wrote/drew thank you cards for everyone who ever helped us out in the classroom.

[Ford_Prefect]

72. There are many versions of bringing balance to the world we occupy.

Some are complicated while others are simple and direct.

If we put good things into the universe we improve it if only for a brief moment. The waves made by the stone tossed in the pond have effects even if they are subtle, small and we never see the result.

Some things we do for the effect they have on others without regard for benefit to ourselves. We do them because we have learned it is important to show respect to others in recognition that they are important to us. We do those things because others have done them for us or for people we care for. We do those things because to us it is an act of kindness and respect, and because it shapes the balance of the universe however small the actions are.

[Raine]

75. My parents never taught me those things or told me to do them but

I learned by watching them and the example they set by the polite civil way they behaved. I'm grateful to them.

[MustLoveBeagles]

76. K&R

[Withywindle]

79. I always offer to help, if I can

And I listen to what they have to say. If they say yes, I will gladly do it, and if they say no, I respect that.

I feel like respecting "no" is important. I have a lot of friends with disabilities who feel overridden by well-meaning people who ignore their "no thank you" and push to do things that aren't actually helpful anyway.

Just ask, and listen to the answer.

[The Jungle 1]

81. Old couple was in the wrong line for returns yesterday.

When the realized it they walked over to the correct line. They were there before me so I invited them to go ahead of me. Seems so easy to do the right thing. But it sure made their day and helped mine.
I was doing a plumbing job at home and it was my third trip to the store. I hate plumbing jobs.

[Texaswitchy]

82. My father was a union man, he made good money.

There were many poor kids in the neighborhood.

So my father got together with the local Czech lounge and had on Saturday spaghetti suppers.

We an lady in neighborhood who was a GI war bride and she made the spaghetti.

Was it ever good.

You could smell the spaghetti sauce when was she cooking it.
All money went to buy food for the kids in the neighborhood.
Everybody knew who was poor back then, small neighood.

My father knew hunger as a child during the depression.

I would go with my mother and a another neighbor to deliver the bags of food to the various houses.

The food was very needed.

No free school lunches back then.

It does take a village.

[lark]

85. Thank you for your caring and helping.

Wish more people were like you.

[GoodRaisin]

87. I was taught these things and kind of done them throughout life almost as a reflex.

Now that I am myself aging and walking with a cane I have to say I really appreciate offers of assistance. There are still people who do it.