So I bought my Covid-19 vaccine 5G microchip control panel today

[krispos42]

https://www.concordaerospace.com/products/covid-microchip-implant-control-panel?variant=40010785358016


Stand by to have your DNA mutated!!!!

[PortTack]

1. Nice 👍

[Ocelot II]

2. Isn't there an iPhone app that does that?

[krispos42]

4. Nah, that's the decoy.

Remember, Bill Gates is a competitor to Apple.

[BelieveCassandra]

3. Link for the app is on your vaccine passport

The control panel is much cooler! All the app does is tell me where I left my glasses and car keys.

[Texaswitchy]

5. Not all of us have iPhones.

I do want to be left behind.

[LakeArenal]

6. Can you DNA me back 40 years and make me a gifted something or other?

[krispos42]

8. Sure! *zap*

Now you are a virtuoso of the recorder!

[LakeArenal]

13. That shouldn't drive anyone crazy. Thanks.

Lots of new friends on the horizon.

[krispos42]

31. Specificity is critical :p

[paleotn]

24. And I want to be rich. Someone important...

Like an actor. You can do that, right?

[LakeArenal]

26. A friend waved a wand over my and asked.

I said a million dollars (this was when a million was real money).

She said abracadabra 🧚?♀️ Ping!

You are a million dollars. 💴💵💸💰

[Thomas Hurt]

7. How does it tell who is a Trumper?

[krispos42]

10. Oh, they have a card for that now

And they only misspelled "Official" once.

[malaise]

35. Too good

K & R

[GoodRaisin]

20. They have a magnetic aura about their heads known as

stupid. It attracts magnetic objects when the chip is energized. Forks have been known to stick.

[DURHAM D]

9. I hope you know that the chip is ransonware and

your device will not work.

btw - I am not kidding about the ransomware . I heard this old man telling his wife while they were in the waiting room that "They were so smart not to get the vaccine because it is really ransomware and they can turn your heart off if they want to".

[Texaswitchy]

12. Damn.

I do not know rather to laugh or cry.

[marble falls]

11. So that's what happened to my drone.

[lindysalsagal]

14. Naaaaa...these old beta models don't even allow any mutation choices!!!

Geeezzz

[EYESORE 9001]

15. First thing I'm gonna do with mutant DNA

is grow a prehensile tail. I’ve always wanted one, but I’ll probably just get in trouble with it.
👿

[FrankBooth]

16. I love mine

It connects so smoothly to Soros World HQ that I get my daily marching orders without any interruptions. I haven't missed a paycheck in weeks. And the nanobots in my bloodstream just love it!

[msfiddlestix]

17. That's great. Wish I could mount this on my car or maybe my head..

[StarryNite]

19. It probably sticks to your head now that you're magnetic.

[AllaN01Bear]

21. if its magnetic, where is all the magnetic stuff like , kitchen sink, transit buss

safe . airplane , battleship?

[Klaralven]

18. Also get their Jewish space laser activation panel

https://www.concordaerospace.com/collections/specials/products/jewish-space-laser-activation-panel

[krispos42]

32. I bought one of those, too

I have no idea how I'm going to use the damn things... Yet

[1cheapbeemr]

22. So the Jewish Space Lasers can get a lock on you

When it comes time to kill all the Goyim.

[Dakota Flint]

23. With all the deaths, including innocent children

I don't think this is funny or cute in the least. This should have been posted on some far-right anti-vax Trump-loving website.

[Hekate]

25. There is this thing called dark humor, that helps get us thru times of sorrow & oppression...

Last edited Fri Aug 6, 2021, 11:38 PM - Edit history (1)

In fact, for some generations now this has been a current running thru American literature, theater, and the movies. You have only to watch a Mel Brooks movie to see it. You think Blazing Saddles is appreciated by real racists and antisemites?

Jewish Space Laser arm patches and the “control panel” are meant to be jokes that mock RW idiocy. There are other bits of merch out there as well, and all of them are thought up by people who understand the sheer overwhelming tragedy of our times — and will not let their spirits be annihilated by it.

You may certainly try posting the contents of the OP in some anti-vax or RW forum, just to see how far you get with it. Not far, would be my guess.

[treestar]

27. FCOL

This is poking fun at the stupidity of the CTers/Anti-vaxxers, not at anyone who died.

[Throckmorton]

28. I hope it works better than the remote control I bought for my cat. N/T

[krispos42]

33. I have one of those

It's called "laser pointer" 😀

[Cinnamonspice]

29. Not good enough.

I want a microchip that helps me shit rainbows.

[Lancero]

30. People with the 2nd gen chips are lucky...

They can just sync their phones up to control it, 1st gen people gotta make due with this thing.

[muriel_volestrangler]

34. "Tracking"? You got the cheap version. Upgrade to the Illuminati, and you can make them do

the macarena on command. And hiccup.