Finnish Skier Suffers 'Frozen' Penis In Winter Olympics Cross-Country Race

[Nevilledog]

Link to tweet

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/remi-lindholm-frozen-penis-winter-olympics_n_6212422ee4b0f93b2619ce28

Cross-country skier Remi Lindholm said he suffered a “little bit frozen” penis in a race Saturday at the Beijing Winter Olympics, Reuters reported.

“You can guess which body part was a little bit frozen when I finished. ... It was one of the worst competitions I’ve been in. It was just about battling through,” Lindholm told Finnish media, per the wire service.

Lindholm’s dilemma was prolonged in the extreme cold and wind. He finished 28th in the 50-kilometer mass start race, which was shortened to 30 km due to the weather. He trailed the winner, Russian Alexander Bolshunov, by 4 minutes and nearly 23 seconds.

He applied a heat pack to his groin afterward but “when the body parts started to warm up after the finish, the pain was unbearable,” he added, per Reuters.

*snip*

[samplegirl]

1. I'll bet it was sticking

straight up!

[Orrex]

2. #coldcocked

[EYESORE 9001]

3. Reminder to self

Use supplemental warming when taking up competitive cross-country skiing.

[Sneederbunk]

4. In Finland it's a Johansson.

[Walleye]

7. 🤪

[Nevilledog]

11. Perfection

[MissMillie]

31. A+ for you (n/t)

.

[Ritabert]

5. A penis-sicle?

[dalton99a]

6. Poor ductwork insulation

[mbusby]

8. Wait till it thaws ...

... or you might break it off.

[OAITW r.2.0]

9. Solution: Electric heated jockstrap. nt

[Sympthsical]

10. "50-kilometer . . . shortened to 30 km due to the weather"

This feels a little too cosmically on point.

So if this skiier started with 7 inches, given a 3/5 ratio, find for . . . .

(I'm so sorry. Sitting here doing chemistry equations this morning).

[BunnyMcGee]

12. OMG

My left thumb was frostbitten as a kid, and I still have pain there when outdoors extensively in Winter. Can't imagine a frozen penis.

[PoliticAverse]

13. You need proper equipment!

[Nevilledog]

15. Hear me out........these in the country's colors

[3catwoman3]

28. No "How to Wear" photos?

[Blue Owl]

14. Brett Kavanaugh recommends frequent waving to improve circulation

[dickthegrouch]

16. Hope it didn't last more than 4 hours

That would just add insult to injury.

[Hugin]

17. In those conditions all competitions should be deemed unisexual.

Below -20 F, it's called a 'cloaca'.

[PCIntern]

18. Yeah I get it....big joke

Actually not funny. At all whatsoever.

If it were a story of a female body part and humor and hilarity ensued, it would be Alerted here and removed.

And yes, I have a great sense of humor.

[Hugin]

19. Having suffered frost bite...

in my foot years ago sledding and I still suffer from nerve and circulatory issues. I tend to agree.

Luckily, no tissue had to be removed. The pain was excruciating.

[PCIntern]

22. On many levels this is upsetting.

And don’t get me wrong, I get the humor possibilities. But the fact of the matter is that this poor fellow will have a very very difficult time healing and may have problems for his lifetime right now in terms of not only sexual function but urination. Also, the area can become hyper sensitive and anything touching it can cause a chronic paresthesia or even pain.

In addition, I have had posts removed or criticized heartily for minor referrals to sexual issues and I’m just looking for consistency in this regard. I thank you all in advance.

[milestogo]

24. Yes I don't find it funny at all.

If its that cold, its dangerous for everyone to be out there. No Olympic medal is worth losing a body part for.

[Orrex]

30. There is no indication that he suffered any lasting damage

He himself treated it with a heat pack. If he'd been injured to the point of requiring medical intervention, the story would certainly have mentioned this prominently.

And, based on the tone of his quote, he seems very aware of the comic potential.

If the same had happened to me, I would post about it on FB specifically to welcome the jokes. In high school I got a lot of comic mileage about a pole vaulting mishap involving the same area. Hell, I can do twenty minutes of material on my colonoscopy.


I suspect that Lindholm will not be greatly harmed by jokes made here or elsewhere.

[PCIntern]

32. Yeah...

Like he’s gonna admit in public that his Dick is damaged.

And as I said: if it were breasts or a vagina and comments such as the above were made, we’d have an all-out war here. As the perennial victim of such wars when I made what were considered by some, sexist, misogynistic comments, I’m just trying to keep some perspective here.

And of course he sees the humor. So do I.

[Orrex]

33. If his dick were damaged, it would absolutely be discussed in the news

CNN et al would love to talk about such an injury, with panels of experts testifying about how best to re-member the injured fellow.

Absent such reporting, we can conclude with some confidence that he did not suffer major injury.


LOL @ "perennial victim," by the way.

[multigraincracker]

20. Get two for one with my all new

goose down insulated jock strap. Comes in 6 different colors.

[iemanja]

21. The cold and wind was brutal for the athletes

I felt badly for them. Poor guy.

[11 Bravo]

23. Batshit Boebert's husband could have helped him to avoid this malady.

Just take it out and wave it a few under-aged girls, and everything will be copacetic.

[sky_masterson]

25. Their Penis broke out into a chorus of "Let it go. Let it Go"

[LuckyCharms]

26. This is no joke! Happened to me once during a mid-day run in winter.

About a five mile run during lunch at work, with some co-workers.

No frostbite damage, but had to soak it in a container of slightly warm water for awhile.

It was cold and windy, just had on sweat pants and a pair of underwear. Started feeling pain toward the end of the run. It turned as white as a sheet of paper, and stung bad.

[Nevilledog]

35. TMI

[smirkymonkey]

27. Ugh. Poor guy.

[Orrex]

29. If he'd been skiing backwards, he'd have frozen assets

[usonian]

34. Solved!