I'm just SO TIRED
I'm tired of sitting here watching everything I worked for, marched for, campaigned for, voted for, be slowly and methodically taken away. Some of it by elected officials, some of it by activist--yes, activist--judges, some of it by right-wing thugs who scream at me or sneer at me in the grocery store if I wear a mask, or at my voting place when I politely say "No thank you" when they try to shove a RepubliKKKan campaign leaflet or pre-marked "sample ballot" into my hands. I'm tired of being angry every day when I look at the news, even at DU, and see instances of one more Black or brown or young life being needlessly taken away by some cop on some ridiculous pretext. I'm tired of being told that my granddaughters will have fewer rights than I did if I don't DO something--as if I haven't spent the last 50+ years DOING SOMETHING already! I'm tired of hearing that "immigrants are ruining this country"---from people whose immigrant grandparents BUILT the damn country. I'm tired of watching my country go down the drain and feeling like I'm only one ancient voice screaming. I'm tired of living in this deterioration and knowing there's nowhere else I can go because I'm so old now that no other country will take me. I"m just...so..very..tired. Living in a constant state of despair and anger is exhausting.
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When Operation "Rescue" was grabbing the headlines, and my friends and I were out on the front lines defending clinics, we met an older woman who came out totally dressed in white. We had seen her at a few marches. She was an orginal suffregette, had marched for abortion rights in the early 70's, and was out defending them in the 90's. We were all in awe, and she told us she had been doing this since the 20's, and it would never end as long as old, scared, insecure men were running things,and we had to always remain on alert.
As I get ready to hit the streets again, I think about her a lot, because now I'm the "older woman" who's been doing this for 50 years, and yes, I'm tired of it. I'm tired of constantly being told I have to have a man's permission to do something, especially control what's happening with my own body. I mean, my own husband didn't think he had that right...somebody's else's should??? I want to scream when I hear this bullshit about "it's up to the legislature" NO IT'S NOT.
It's up to the woman involved. Period.
As we said back then...keep your laws off my body.
I would like to believe the progress of my lifetime will not all be undone in the arc of my lifetime — but it looks like it’s going to be a near thing. SCOTUS gutted the Voting Rights Act, remember?
This past week has been a living hell.
Loud and clear, and feel much the same. Then I try to imagine what the Ukranians are going through. They inspire me so much... their courage, their strength. We just have to continue to fight. It seems to be a perpetual state.
Let's hang in there. I will if you will. 
One generation advances progress, then the next yearns for the 'good old days' and attempts to go fully back to it, but never quite gets there as this locks in the interim step so the 3rd generation starts again from an advanced position compared to Gen 1.
A very good philosophical novel that explains this process very well is 'Lila: An Inquiry into Morals ' by Robert M. Pirsig.
Yes - the same 20th Century philosopher who brought us "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance". In fact Lila is the 'sequel'.
Lila is a much harder read and not nearly as popular as Zen, however if one takes the time to read and comprehend what Pirsig is trying to tell us it is actually the more powerful of the set.
I would recommend reading Zen first to fully understand the foundations of the philosophy Pirsig is attempting to develop, but it is not required.
From Wiki https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lila:_An_Inquiry_into_Morals :
On Edit: Found this gem (to me), though he has left this world in 2017, Pirsig's Third book is out: "he co-authored ... 'On Quality: An Inquiry Into Excellence: Selected and Unpublished Writings' (2022) along with his wife (now widow) and editor, Wendy Pirsig"
You're not the only "ancient" voice as this thread proves. The only thing "ancient" about any of this is the war. The reality is this is another battle in a war against oppression that has been going on for hundreds and hundreds of generations around the world. There are so many moments in human history where the many rise up against the few. Sometimes a little is gained and sticks, usually at huge sacrifice. I truly believe, even with the myriad of faults with this drastic experiment that is America, the sins of this country, that the piece of parchment that in principle guides not only us here, but fledgling democracies around the world, has led us to a time that is finally for real threatening the human trait of darwinian self centered dominance more than any time in human social history. That piece of paper, imo, is a culmination of lessons from every battle fought in this war over the last 3000 years.
As much as I personally share your weariness, as tired and frustrated as I find myself, as despair driven anger sometimes pushes me to the brink of hatred, I try and remind myself, this is how they win. I made a promise to myself many decades ago that every day the universe allows my now Model T conciseness to start with a bang bang and a puff of smoke as it ponders a new day, I will do whatever I can to fight in this battle. Not that I matter much but like one rain drop in an ocean I'm going to cause a miniscule ripple every single day to make the sea just a tiny bit rougher for them. Yes, that's a naive metaphor but it was something my grandmother told me whenever I felt like I was facing overwhelming diversity.
Work on your daily ripple, let's turn those ripples into a tsunami, we are so close 
Very tired of Democrats being blamed for everything.
inspiration and energy in numbers 
