'Men Always Win': Survivors 'Sickened' by the Amber Heard Verdict

[Nevilledog]

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Caroline Orr Bueno, Ph.D
@RVAwonk
Forensic psychologist Jessica Taylor says she has already been contacted by “hundreds” of abuse survivors who now want to retract statements they made in the press, or pull out of court cases against their abusers, as a result of the Heard/Depp trial.

rollingstone.com
‘Men Always Win’: Survivors ‘Sickened’ by the Amber Heard Verdict
"This is basically the end of MeToo," says one expert. "It's the death of a movement." What the Heard-Depp verdict means survivors of abuse.
8:41 PM · Jun 1, 2022

https://www.rollingstone.com/culture/culture-news/amber-heard-johnny-depp-verdict-metoo-trial-1361356/

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https://archive.ph/GcHtB

Over the past few weeks, Meghan has been watching the Johnny Depp-Amber Heard trial with a sinking feeling. A few years ago, she had been involved in a contentious breakup with her then-husband following years of physical and emotional abuse, which led to her calling the police repeatedly. Like Heard, Meghan, whose last name Rolling Stone has chosen to withhold, had recorded his outbursts and threats of violence and self-harm, in case, she says, “if he killed me, there would be evidence”; like Heard, when she spoke out about her ex, she received a letter from his lawyer accusing her of defamation; and like Heard, she says her ex’s lawyer also tried to argue she had borderline personality disorder, a form of mental illness, as a means of trying to discredit her.

Meghan initially tried to avoid the Depp-Heard trial as much as she could, as it caused her to experience PTSD flashbacks. But throughout the trial, everything from Heard’s hair and clothing to her tearful testimony became fodder for countless memes, while Depp’s cocksure behavior on the stand inspired innumerable fawning TikTok videos, cryptocurrency, and Etsy merch. The discourse was unavoidable. “It’s been bizarre to see friends I thought were supportive posting disgusting Amber Heard memes,” she says. When she heard that Depp had Heard with “total global humiliation” after she came forward with abuse allegations against him, it was too much for Meghan to handle: Her ex had long threatened her with the same thing.

“This case is my worst fear playing out on a public stage,” she says. “[It] tells me that [my ex] was right. If he chose to, he could destroy and humiliate me beyond repair.”

This feeling was only exacerbated on Wednesday after a jury in Fairfax, Virginia, found Amber Heard guilty of defaming Depp in a 2018 op-ed for the Washington Post, in which she identified herself as a public face of domestic abuse survivors, without explicitly naming Depp. Despite presenting photos of her injuries, video recordings of Depp’s meltdowns, and witness testimony supporting her claims of abuse, Depp was awarded $10 million plus $5 million in punitive damages. Heard was also awarded $2 million for winning one point in her countersuit.

But in truth, the highly publicized trial was decided in the court of public opinion weeks ago. As it played out over the last few weeks, with people on social media overwhelmingly aligning with the beloved Pirates of the Caribbean star, millions of stans and even brands and celebrities have excoriated Heard and accused her of fabricating the allegations against Depp, causing hashtags like #AmberTurd and #JusticeForJohnnyDepp to trend worldwide.

*snip*

[Frasier Balzov]

1. Amber I want you to meet Jussie.

You two need to be besties.

[Raine]

3. Lol, exactly! 👍 nt

[jaysunb]

6. +100 !! Nt

[MLAA]

2. I watched quite a bit of the trial. I agree with the verdict.

[vanlassie]

5. Agree.

[Scottie Mom]

7. Totally agree.

Amber lied over and over.

[Amishman]

14. Agreed, she pretty clearly was the one in the wrong

She is anything but a victim in this story

[Sympthsical]

4. Tying themselves right to that Amber anchor, I see

It's a shame. Me Too has done so much good. Women need to be heard and listened to. But not every single person needs to be believed. Especially when so much evidence is provided in court that the person is making false accusations.

A lot of credibility is now circling the toilet. And for Amber Heard? Despite all evidence that she lied and made things up?

If it is the end of Me Too, it won't be because Depp won.

It will be because people are too stubborn and ideologically tunnel visioned to understand why he did and why he deserved to.

[Celerity]

9. So glad I didn't watch any of this shitshow. I really couldn't care less about either Depp or Heard.

When my friends brought it up, I was like................ NEXT.

I do not know what it is, but I have always been entirely bored and pretty much dispassionate in regards to celebrity culture, especially the turgid British 'reality' telly scene, which is almost across the board populated with the most vile of plastic, disposable, quotidian trash. I find it a huge distraction, a maelstrom of meaninglessness. My sister is the exact opposite and it has caused some minor conflicts in the past, but she long ago learned not to gob on about it with me, lol.

[Sympthsical]

10. It was intereting from a cultural perspective

I have to admit, I am not a celebrity person. I don't get "fandom" and how all that works. I can't think of a single thing or person I'm a fan of. I've only ever seen the first Pirates movie, and that was three times in a row on an interminable flight from Stockholm when I forgot to put books in my carry on.

However, the idea that a man could be the victim in a domestic violence situation is something our culture doesn't have a lot of experience with and doesn't spend a lot of time discussing. What people are forgetting is that this was not a flattering play on the part of Depp. The man is an addict, and I think any relationship with him would be unbearably toxic. However, when Heard was taunting him on audio tape that no one would ever believe him, I think it dug under the skin of a lot of victims everywhere - male and female. Reddit and other places have been full of stories from men about being in abusive relationships and the way our culture can minimize or dismiss their suffering - if not outright taunt and shame them about it.

So it was an interesting spotlight.

That said, Britain's celebrity culture is wild. I lived there for a few years, and I just didn't understand it. What happens on Big Brother or Love Island is headline news in the papers? I don't think Americans will ever really know what someone like Diana or, contemporaneously, Meghan Markle went through, because we just don't play in that same kind of celebrity league. Their celebrity tabloid culture makes Americans seem like we're only passingly interested in ours by comparison.

With this, I'm WFH and in school, so I like listening to trials sometimes. I think I'm one of the only people on this board who actually watched the Rittenhouse trial and wasn't only going off biased Twitter commentary and articles highly slanted based on politics and ideology. Similar with this. A lot of takes on this seem based on what is being said on Twitter or in articles that agree with preconceived worldviews. I read an article last night on AV Club where I know the author didn't watch or read anything except selected highlights predisposed to a narrative. Every other sentence was wrong.

I think what's really really interesting is the idea Depp's win is somehow a loss for women or victims. The very idea that he could've been a victim is never a possibility. They illustrate the problem without realizing it.

But it's over. This is one of those, "After today, I doubt I have cause to revisit this," sort of things. I'll just move on to the next trial once summer semester starts.

[Celerity]

13. thanks for the detailed reply

[Dorian Gray]

8. What's interesting to me

(and it's apparent in all the replies here) is that Depp charmed everyone on the stand and everyone automatically supports him.

I think the abuse in their relationship was obvious. It went both ways. Amber is extremely unlikable.

From the testimony I read and heard directly from the trial, though, I would have pushed to not give any damages to Depp. Why? Bc I don't think she actually defamed him.

Do I want to hang out with her? Hell no.

Would I want someone I love to get in a relationship with her? DOUBLE HELL NO!

She's troubled and problematic. But I STILL don't think she defamed him.

Just my perspective.

(And I think Depp is just as problematic. You'd have to be a serious star chaser to get in a relationship with him at this point.)

[MrsCoffee]

11. +1

[Tom Rinaldo]

12. I did NOT follow this trial. Not for a moment

So I am totally unaware of the substance of the claims and counter claims and related supporting evidence from either side other than what I was exposed to during the breaking news coverage after the verdict was reached.

It is clear to me that a finding like this against Heard will almost certainly cause some women who have legitimate claims of abuse against men to seriously reconsider whether they are willing to make those claims in public, let alone attempt to press charges, and that is a tragic byproduct of this verdict. But it is also clear to me that we have a jury system in America, and that not every person accused of criminal and/or deplorable conduct should be considered guilty of it, not even rich and famous white men, based on the charges alone. False claims are made in America, just like everywhere else, and though I am perfectly willing to believe that false claims are more likely made by men then by women, potentially far more likely in fact, that by itself doesn't determine the merits of an individual case.

It took a unanimous finding of a mixed gender twelve person jury to rule against Heard in this case, and the burden of proof is high for defamation.Those twelve individuals paid a lot more attention to the details of this case than I did, or did 99%+ of those who were following it in the media. No doubt if I had been following this case personally I would have strong personal feelings about who was guilty of what, but I was not a juror. I can't turn against the jury system in America selectively only when I am not happy with a verdict, at least not without some evidence potentially strong enough to overturn that verdict on appeal, or of significant misconduct by the winning side in the trial.

I fully believe that our justice system has inherent ingrained biases against women, against poor people, and against minorities in America, because our society has inherent ingrained biases against women, against poor people, and against minorities in America. Some of that was on display in some misogamist reactions displayed by some following this trial. It is the ongoing struggle of lifetimes to root out and counter such biases, in the meantime individuals continue to go on trial accused of various misconduct and they can't simply be ruled against in every instance (not that they would be of course) because they hold a privileged status in America. I am surprised by how little the commentary that I've seen on this verdict includes any deference for our jury system.