"Life Begins At Ejaculation!"

[kpete]

?w=600&h=813

[Beetwasher.]

1. There Once Was a Man from Zanzibar

Who saved all his cum in a mayonnaise jar
He let it rot in the sun
‘Til twenty-31
Then sold it as fine caviar

[LuckyCharms]

6. Ah, an aristrocrat!

[Beetwasher.]

10. Indeed

[ECL213]

44. Ugh...

[kwijybo]

2. Every teenage male charged with mass murder

Film at Eleven

[Beetwasher.]

11. Reminds me of the joke with the punchline

“Hmm, you may be right. Guess I’ll give them another chance” *SLURP*

[fightforfreedom]

40. Lol. Make that every male.

[llmart]

3. Gotta love her dress.

I've always felt like if the Catholics are going to try to foist their silly-assed rules on the rest of us by quoting some obscure bible verse, then we need to talk about the verse that speaks of a man "spilling his seed on the ground" or whatever that saying is. We need to monitor any guy who does that and have a law ready to force them to be made a eunuch.

Disclaimer: I probably don't have that right because I'm an atheist and was brought up an atheist, so I had no religious training/education (thank you, Mom and Dad), and what I know about bible verses can fit on the tip of a pin.

[leftieNanner]

8. The Thing About the Bible?

You become a human being with your first breath.

And it's in the old testament about the "spilling of the seed" thing. Orthodox Jews have a problem with that.

[Fullduplexxx]

12. asinine " force them to be made a eunuch."

and it wasnt the "spilling of the seed" that was wicked - it was him spilling it on the ground instead of in his brother-in-law's wife

[Beetwasher.]

13. It's a Lewinsky

[twodogsbarking]

21. I grew up Catholic. You nailed it.

[calimary]

30. Yep. Me too.

Remember the Monty Python song “Every Sperm is Sacred”?

Shit! Just saw post 16!

I hadn’t read down the thread before I posted!

[DENVERPOPS]

22. Exactly

If they want to ban birth control, then guys jacking off would be a federal offense because they are controlling births before they even begin..........outlaw jacking off of males, the same as BC pills, IUD's, Condoms, morning after pills, etc etc........

[KS Toronado]

26. That's where pro-lifers are headed.

[certainot]

32. all the sexual repression is ultimately about ENCOURAGING masturbation to feed authoritarianism

by default most masturbation is done with the right hand (we became 90% right handed because being a violent stupid asshole had survival value in times of conflict), less so in females because of anatomy and mechanics. the right hand is connected to the left hemisphere where those impatient satisfaction demanding repro urges interfere with logic and rational thinking and push for certainty, closure, finality etc - and when they mix with numbers and quantification they want more , bigger, faster.....

that's called sex on the wrong brain. authoritarians need certainty more which increases avoidance and fear of uncertainty (authoritarianism sometimes measured with the uncertainty avoidance index or UAI)

whether they know it or not major religions most important function, same as authoritarian societies, is to repress sex to increase masturbation in young men to help supply the armies needed to protect the church and leadership.

in the koran it actually says it - 'man can only have sex with his wife and that which the right hand possesses"

[TheBlackAdder]

33. It's almost like she subliminally wants to have it sprayed all over her body.

[whathehell]

41. Um..Ever heard of "Protestant Evangelicals"?

If not, you might want to learn about them as they've worked as hard, if not harder, to enact anti- abortion legislation as Catholics.

In addition, they are, overall, more likely to vote Republicans than are Catholics.

[3auld6phart]

4. Dang it

Does that mean if I spill my seed on the floorI’ve
committed murder? For shame.Let’s face it, 90%
of us do it the other 10% are liars..
nuke:

[AndyS]

5. Naaa, life begins at erection . . .

ask ay man my age . . .

[SpankMe]

7. Dang, I LOL'd at this one!! n/t

[erronis]

9. I was going to say that it begins right when thinking about opening porn.hub.

Not that I know anything about that type of place. (Too damn old to care anymore.)

[DENVERPOPS]

23. Perfect LOL nc

[calimary]

31. Well, there is that.

[Midnight Writer]

14. I shoot my seed at the sky so God can catch it and use it again.

[Wicked Blue]

15. Compulsory CHILD SUPPORT begins

at ejaculation

[roamer65]

16. ...

[Martin Eden]

18. Fortunately for the Protestants

The men could wear a French Tickler on their John Thomas, and didn't have to sell excess children for medical experiments.

[roamer65]

19. +1000

[LudwigPastorius]

17. The GOP has certified Mandatory Gonad Inspectors to make sure that...

all those little swimmers get a chance.

?cb=1462846538

[CottonBear]

24. Those teabagger signs are classics. Stupid, clueless MFers!

🤣

[twodogsbarking]

20. Life begins when you retire. Ban jobs.

[trusty elf]

25. crusade

[certainot]

29. hilarious. on fox of course

[IronLionZion]

39. Video

It's a fictional skit but many conservatives would believe it

[VGNonly]

27. Life begins

with a swipe right.

[H2O Man]

28. Recommended.

Outlaw wet dreams! Prosecute!

[malthaussen]

34. Every Sperm is Sacred.

Ah, well, someone beat me to it.

-- Mal

[jimlup]

43. You beat me to it!

[beaglelover]

35. The majority of men must murder 10s of billions of lives

During their lifetimes! LOL!

[Mme. Defarge]

36. On the other hand,

I say life begins when one can truly defend oneself with a firearm.

[spike jones]

38. My life began about 3 billion years ago and has been an unbroken chain ever since. n/t

[bucolic_frolic]

42. OMG is that great. What a dress, sure to see those ejaculating all over the place

[Harker]

45. Spermanent press.

I guess.

[bucolic_frolic]

46. Ha! Good one.

[Harker]

47. Sometimes I wonder why I come to DU.

Other times I know I was meant to be !

[YoshidaYui]

48. NOT A DRESS I WOULD WEAR

BUT I LIKE IT!

[uponit7771]

49. right ?!

[keithbvadu2]

50. Old family photos