Very useful guide for social media: HOW TO TROLL RUSSIAN OFFICIALS
https://nataliaantonova.substack.com/p/how-to-troll-russian-officialsNot only that, but trolling evil is preferable to doomscrolling. It can and will make you feel better. And yes, you can do it in English. These people monitor their replies, on Twitter especially. It’s how their bureaucracy works, they are interested in engagement. But just in case, I will be providing Russian translations here too (not exact translations, because euphemisms and native phrasing are important).
Yes, a lot of this will be unpleasant. That’s because war is unpleasant as a rule.
1. Use superstitions
Russian officials pretend to be pious and religious — religious reactionaries form a big part of Putin’s support network — but in reality most are just superstitious.
Feel free to tell them things like:
“Hellfire is getting closer” [Ад близок]
“You are cursed. And you know it.” [Ребята, вы давно прокляты. И вы это отлично знаете]
“Congrats. Generations of Russians will pay for the evil you’ve unleashed. Your fake patriarch won’t save you” [Расплачиваться будете долго. Не отмоетесь. Никакие молитвы продажного Гундяева не спасут]
Variations are always welcome and encouraged. Make sure to impart a sense of doom. They feel it already. It’s why many are hysterical online.
2. Remind them of superior Americans and other Westerners
Sure, Russia has its own culture and scientific community. These exist in spite of and not because of the oppressive Russian government. And these oppressors absolutely hate when they are reminded of how much more successful their rivals abroad are.
It doesn’t matter if you like said rivals. What matters is that Russian officials hate them and are envious of them.
This is why you can say things like:
“Hey, can you please tell me why there’s never been or will be a Russian Elon Musk?” [Ой, а почему у России нет своего Илона Маска но зато до фига ученых сидит по тюрьмам?]
“You’re right, Russia is a global leader. Hollywood and iPhones have nothing on Besogon-TV and a fleet of Ladas with no airbags” [Куда уж нам до вас, с нашим Голливудом и айфонами, когда у вас Бесогон-ТВ и Лада без подушек безопасности]
“Silicon Valley is so very jealous of Skolkovo.” [У кого Силиконовая долина, у кого долина лаптевая]
3. Vague allegations of illegal deeds
Almost everyone in the Russian government is breaking some kind of law. In fact, the Russian system is designed that way for a reason — it’s easier to control people when they’re constantly one misstep away from being arrested.
Russian officials are aware of this. Mess with their minds accordingly:
“We’re all aware of your past. Think you’ll escape purges when Russia inevitably loses this war?” [Человеку с вашим прошлым пора рвать когти из России нах, а не чирикать о Русском мире - ведь придут же за вами, свои же]
“You think you can hide your dirty money for long or nah?” [Скажите, а ваши активы, ну, те самые, долго еще будут оставаться вашими?]
“You do a lot of talking for someone whose arrest in inevitable.” [Ох, смиряйтесь, учите классику шансона, готовьтесь к чифиру и параше, с вашей-то биографией.]
4. Use their homophobia against them
Russian officialdom is as homophobic as it is homoerotic. For proof, just check out Putin’s cozy vacation photos with the likes of Defense Minister Shoigu.
This is why you can hit them with:
“How does it feel knowing that a bunch of gay-friendly nations are supplying weapons that are wrecking your guys in Ukraine?” [А вам не грустно от того, что техника созданная в так-называемой Гейропе превращает ваших солдатиков в удобрение?]
“Hey, what’s up with your president and minister Shoigu? Trouble in paradise?” [А Путин с Шойгу расстались что ли? Трагический финал Горбатой Горы, вот это всё?]
Russians are also obsessed with “getting up off [their] knees,” a euphemism for restoring Russian imperial might since the fall of the USSR, and you should have fun with it. Just remember — don’t sink to their level and engage in homophobia yourself. The goal is to use their fears effectively.
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Last edited Mon Jul 11, 2022, 08:35 PM - Edit history (1)
Before I joined DU in 2017 - also lurked here in 2016 - I was on the Yahoo boards that were loaded with ChumpHumpers. But based on what I've learned from DU posters, some/many of those posters on Yahoo weren't ChumpHumpers, they were Russian trolls pretending to be ChumpHumpers.
So they had predictable, repeatable responses to pretty much everything. Didn't matter what the OP was about. The reason is that they weren't really responding, they were copy/pasting stuff from an archive somewhere. It looked to me like somebody wrote up a list of standard repeatable insults against Democrats/Libtards/Socialists and I saw those same insults everywhere on the Yahoo boards. If anybody challenged them or responded to their comments, they had no answer. They literally didn't understand your reply. All they could do is copy/paste another Dem/libtard/socialist insult, or else just ignore it.
My challenge usually had to do with calling them "Karl Rove's unpaid interns" who work in the basement of the GOP headquarters, or some such nonsense. They didn't know what to make of this and they couldn't respond because nothing in their archive was keyed to "Karl Rove" or "unpaid intern." 
Yahoo really got to be a drag though. That's why I was happy to join DU after Chump's inauguration. It's so much friendlier here and the group is far more intelligent too.
