Do sex toys belong in 'comprehensive sex education' for high school students?

[marmar]

Do sex toys belong in ‘comprehensive sex education’ for high school students?
The administration at Chicago’s Francis Parker School and many parents are strongly defending the school’s comprehensive sex ed curriculum, including presenting sex toys to a small group of high schoolers. But other parents say it’s inappropriate.

By Char Daston | WBEZ Dec 19, 2022, 7:00am EST


After a secretly recorded video discussing a queer sex ed lesson at Chicago’s Francis Parker School was widely circulated recently, subjecting the school to a torrent of online harassment, school leaders strongly defended its “LGBTQ+ affirming and comprehensive approach” to sexual education.

But the one-time session, which included showing high school students dildos and butt plugs, is raising questions both inside and outside of Parker about the school’s approach to sexual education.

The video was covertly recorded by an operative of the far-right group Project Veritas who Parker said presented himself as an attendee at an education conference. It shows the Parker dean of student life discussing the sex toy portion of the optional lesson for high schoolers and his strong support for it. New York-based Project Veritas is known for edited undercover videos intended to discredit progressive groups and media outlets.

In an email to the school community last week, Parker’s principal said just six students, mostly seniors, attended the 30 minute one-time session presented by an outside LGBTQ+ health group, and that school adults were present. ............(more)

https://chicago.suntimes.com/education/2022/12/19/23512045/do-sex-toys-belong-in-comprehensive-sex-education-for-high-school-students

[Laffy Kat]

1. I don't see why not. nt

[Zambero]

2. Hmmm, why not have Marge weigh in on this one?

Since she's an expert on how and where to source these devices!

[NutmegYankee]

3. I swear people have forgotten about what it was like to be in high school

I mean seriously, the question should be more along the lines of what teenager doesn't know about these things.

[Ocelot II]

9. I didn't know about those things when I was in high school

but that was a very long time ago.

[msfiddlestix]

77. ✔️ ✔️ ✔️ ✔️ ✔️ n/t

[Wingus Dingus]

19. I didn't know about any of it.

I really would have been thoroughly embarrassed to have to sit through a class in which your teacher taught you how to pleasure yourself or your partner with sex toys, or techniques, or food, or what have you. Really, this is ridiculous.

[Ocelot II]

41. I'd have perished of embarrassment, as most of my classmates would have done.

I can just imagine all the nervous giggles and the kids looking anywhere except at the teacher or each other. Our sex ed classes in those days, such as they were, consisted of brief, cursory anatomical explanations of what the various organs did, but definitely not how they were used. The very existence of sex toys was unknown to most of us, unless we had discovered some mysterious gadget in our parents' bedroom that we didn't want to think about.

[Wingus Dingus]

57. Yep, same. Nervous giggles and red faces just at the plumbing illustrations, when

I was young back in the 80's. I swear to god, if some wacko suggests video (you know, sorta like porn) to instruct kids on "proper use" of these items or sexual techniques in general, there will be some here thinking that's a great idea...

[Archae]

4. No.

I'm not anti-gay or whatnot, kids going through puberty don't need those in authority showing them how to use sex toys.

[Hugh_Lebowski]

10. Does it say they were showing them how to use them?

Anyways, many teens look at porn on the web anyways ... well the boys for sure, and I'm sure some girls as well. Which means they've seen such devices, and very graphic demonstrations of their use.

Also, many Seniors are 18 (esp. later in the school year), and I'd imagine they got parental consent for those who were minors.

[Ocelot II]

12. I think I would have died of embarrassment at that age

if a teacher had started brandishing dildos and butt plugs in a class. But I was embarrassed all the time as a teenager anyhow.

[Dorian Gray]

75. THIS

I vote no way. No sex toys in a high school sex ed class. For a number of reasons. Mostly to preserve the teacher's sense of dignity. Asking them to do this very awkward thing with kids and parents who may object is really not okay.

[leftyladyfrommo]

5. Those kids should learn about sex the way we did.

1960. Mom gave us a picture book. That was it from parents.
High school health sort of mentioned the word.

That's what backseats of Chevy convertibles and drive in movies were for.

[Act_of_Reparation]

27. "The way we did things in 1960"

Is reason enough for me to want to do the exact opposite.

[leftyladyfrommo]

31. It was pretty bad. I had a friend who was a senior

in high school in SLC who was all upset because she just found out "you had to do that" to have kids.

I saw later that she had 4 sons.

[MichMan]

30. Kids today have it so easy.

They just look at pornography on their phones like it's nothing.

We had to be much more industrious. Some kid would "borrow" a porn magazine from an older brother, and it would get passed around. Hopefully returned before the brother "needed" it.

[myohmy2]

6. sure...

...it's what people do...it's how many people play...

...even politicians talk about it...

...it appears to be one-time and may have been for a selected or voluntary group...

...but then maybe I'm just old fashioned...

[LAS14]

7. How come the cis/straight kids didn't get to see the sex toy presentation? Not...

... a sarcastic question. I think their structure is subtly denigrating to the lgbtq community.

[Sympthsical]

15. That's what's really irking me about this story

It's not the sex education - which I always whole-heartedly support.

It's as if, in defense of the program, they're saying, "Well, you know, sex toys are kind of their thing. Practically part of their culture, really."

It's such a weird defense to me for some reason. As if straight people don't manage these things. It kind of paints my community in a certain way.

Like they're almost saying, "You know those kinky, weird gays and their butt plugs."

I can't quite put my finger on why I want to say, "Wait, you thought that was a defense?" One of the guys in charge includes it all into "queer sex." Ok, how about making it just sex? What's queer about a dildo?

Just kind of tilting my head at it a bit.

Like they singled out the LGBT kids to talk about sex toys. It's weird to me.

[Dorian Gray]

76. Thank you for this perspective

it's a piece of it I hadn't thought about.

[Ms. Toad]

44. I think you're misreading it.

The presentation was by an LGBTQ group. Students had to opt into it - and only a small group did. I don't see anything in the quoted portion which suggests it was only LGBTQ students who opted in - or that it was limited to LGBTQ students.

I don't have access to the full article - but what is quoted above didn't say access was limited.

[meadowlander]

52. Some people have a more complex sexuality

and their way of having sex may rely more on toys. I don't think that's denigrating the LGBTQ community or, as someone said above, that the presentation was set up in a way that singled them out.

For example, someone who is asexual to the extent that they are repulsed by the idea of having sex with another person but still masturbates, or trans men who haven't medically transitioned. It could also be useful to women who have never achieved an orgasm before and want to figure out how to do it before they start having sex with boys who are also inexperienced.

And probably better to learn about it from a teacher than from porn and the interwebs. I don't see a problem with a voluntary information session that covers what's available and how to use it at a high level, particular where there are safety considerations.

[LAS14]

53. I don't think the "some people" are necessarily better represented in the lgbtq community. nt

[meadowlander]

54. No, but there are obvious intersects,

as I said above with asexuals and trans people.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

8. Combined with info about pleasure and consent, absolutely. Why not?

[LakeArenal]

11. Sex toys might prevent pregnancy.

[LuckyCharms]

13. Yes, I think so.

Teenagers are not stupid.

If the information is presented to them in a respectful way, and it is explained that sex toys can be a part of a healthy sexual relationship (or can be used for self-gratification), then they belong in a discussion about "comprehensive sex education".

[Demsrule86]

14. Of course not. I taught sex ed my first few years of teaching in an all boy's school. We taught

scientific fact and that is how it should be handled. Parents were allowed to opt-out if they chose. I can't think of a better way to lose elections than to support such a thing.

[LeftInTX]

49. Or create drama from thousands of miles away

Cue...Rabid parents at Texas school board meetings, "Kids are being exposed to sex toys!"
Texas already has "abstinence only" sex education. Trust me, kids are not exposed to sex toys in Texas schools, but that won't stop parents from insisting that they are.

Or the Texas lege will insist that Texas students are being exposed to sex toys and will further shut down public education based on something that is happening in Chicago.

[Demsrule86]

80. Why anyone would even consider such a thing...it would inevitably cost us votes and elections.

My students were red-faced and shy about it. They couldn't wait for it to end...there were a few disruptors (always are). One thing that I think should be gone over is Autoerotic asphyxia... which mostly boys engage in. It kills some of them every year. My husband 2nd cousin died of it a few years back. He was 17. In the first private school I taught in, we did a presentation every year.


https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/7961352/

[niyad]

16. "If we don't teach teenagers about sex, they won't do it." This was a direct

quote from beverly lehaye (ostensible "founder and president" of concerned women for america, and wife of that disgustingly awful "left behind" co-author tim lehaye) on the Phil Donahue talk show one unforgettable afternoon. Phil's jaw dropped as the audience howled with laughter. Jaw back in place, still stunned, he said, "You can't possibly believe that." She insisted that she did. Phil cut to commercial.

[Wingus Dingus]

17. Jesus Christ, we keep inventing new ways to lose local elections.

[Freethinker65]

18. Voluntary attendance by near adult, many sexually active already, high schoolers after hours...

WTF not?

No one was required to attend. Knowing what is out there and what is safe to use, how to clean and maintain, etc. would possibly be valuable to some of them. Avoiding a visit to the doctor or emergency room for misuse due to ignorance is a positive.

[Demsrule86]

29. Politically it would be a disaster and I consider it none of our business.

[Freethinker65]

40. Yeah. Puritanism runs deep in the US.

No reason not to have such programs tho. Just don't get school districts involved.

[Lars39]

20. If for no other reason than to talk safety

(how to clean) and personal boundaries.

[Walleye]

21. I remember when Joycelyn Elders was surgeon general

They accused her of teaching kids to masturbate, she replied something like you don’t need to teach kids how to masturbate, god taught them that. I thought that was so sensible I’ve never forgotten it.

[Mad_Machine76]

43. I hated how maligned she was

She was being more frank and open and honest than many people were willing to listen to back then, unfortunately and became a victim of right-wing politics.

[Walleye]

45. Well she was a Black woman so...

[NickB79]

22. No

[peacefreak2.0]

23. Knowledge is power.

Better if it’s rechargeable. 😈

[milestogo]

24. Is it more important to know about a butt plug than civics or history?

[LuckyCharms]

25. Why not both?

[MichMan]

26. You could incorporate them in all other kinds of lessons too.

1) History of Dildos from medieval times to the present

2) Using math principles of geometry and calculus to calculate the volumetric area of various butt plugs

3) Physics of vibration amplitude and frequency characteristics of Vibrators.

4) Chemistry of popular sex lubes

[Act_of_Reparation]

28. Right, civics and history are the only things people need to know about.

Cancel English, math, science, lunch, and recess.

It's just comparative politics and manifest destiny for all eight periods from here on out, kids.

[milestogo]

34. The point is that our educational system has been dumbed down for years.

That's why we have so many stupid voters..

[meadowlander]

56. Was going to say nobody ever got an infection from not using civics or history correctly...

but then, the last two years...

[Blue_Adept]

64. This isn't an either/or thing

C'mon. Then again, I know people hardly ever read the actual articles posted here and just go by belief of what it says.

I'd suggest trying to catch "Minx" on HBO Max to find out what a lot of people discover about their own health and well-being through sex toys going back to the 70s.

[Act_of_Reparation]

32. Project Veritas, eh?

Sad to see how many of us didn't bother reading the whole article before clutching their pearls.

[LeftInTX]

50. It doesn't surprise me.

[inthewind21]

63. Amen

[CTyankee]

33. I bought a paperback copy of "Our Body, Ourselves" to put on the living room coffee table without

comment and pretty soon it was worn from usage. Not that I wasn't available for questions, but it was adjunct reading material for consultation by my kids at any time. Not only was it good sex education, it was liberal politically. "Let the Sun Shine in" from "Hair" was popular, I recall.

[MineralMan]

47. Yay You! Seriously.

Normalizing adolescents' interest in sex seems like a wise thing to do. They will search out information, regardless, so you might as well make it easy for them to find information. Even as a guy in my early 20's, "Our Bodies, Ourselves" was very educational for me. I learned important things by reading it.

Earlier in my adolescence, though, my parents left instructional materials on those topics in the bookcase in the living room. They didn't point them out to me, or my 1-year younger sister, but we found them all the same and learned from them. One was a textbook from my mother's nursing training. "Obstetrics and Gynecology for Nurses." The other one was a marriage manual published in the late 1940s, which turned out to be surprisingly even-handed on the subject. We read them. Our parents knew we read them. We didn't hide that fact. Those books were our sex education, along with my father's advice, "Son, don't get your girlfriend pregnant. That would change both of your lives in ways you don't want. Just don't do what causes pregnancies." So, I didn't.

[Happy Hoosier]

35. Ummm.... sure... why not?

Isn't that kind of thing part of a "comprehensive" sex education?

Kids will be exp[osed to these things. It's a good idea for them to know what they are from an unbiased infromational source, rather than sniggering peers.

[DBoon]

36. so now we restrict high school curricula based on whether Project Veritas can make it look bad?

So now any teacher in any subject needs to think, "If Project Veritas released a heavily edited and malicious video of my class, could I get in trouble"?

[Shipwack]

37. The answer is "yes" , but reality sometimes has...

... a conservative bias.

In my ideal world, sex education would include not only the basic mechanics and physiology, but other subjects too. Important issues such as gender and orientation, but also consent, safety, dating and techniques.

But alas, we live in a country founded by prudes... In many places (if not most), you can't even talk about birth control options.

Baby steps need to be taken. The day when every student is able to learn about IUDs and dental dams we'll be able to talk about all the "extra" stuff.

BTW, I agree with those who find it weird that this demo was only for LGBTQ+ students...

[AngryOldDem]

38. With abortion and health care going the way they are...

Kids will need all the education they can get.

Groups like Project Veritas cherry-pick in order to inflame and distort.

[Midnight Writer]

39. I would rather see schools teach young folks how to handle their finances.

It is distressing to me to see so many young people digging financial holes for themselves they will never get out of. So many don't understand credit and investing, and our financial system is extremely predatory for those who don't know how to manage it.

Sex toys are exactly that: toys. I think folks that are interested in them will be able to figure them out. They need to know two words: use lube.

[Mad_Machine76]

42. I honestly can't get worked up over this

And when you think about it, sex toys are actually a safer sexual activity for people to engage in alone or between consenting partners. And we're not talking about little kids here either. If they're seniors they're legal adults or pretty close to being one. PV and other parties getting worked up over this need to seriously get a life.

[sarisataka]

46. It seems necessary

After all it's not like every kid is carrying around an electronic device in their pocket that they could just ask it what's a butt plug and get answers, video instructions and ads as to where to buy them.

I suppose the counter is how would the kids even know they exist? We could be ridiculous and say some public person, such as a politician, tells the world they are available at local department stores…

[Mr.Bill]

48. It appears the demise

of Penthouse magazine has left a vacuum in the area of sex education.

[Polybius]

51. Depends on what the end game is

Let's say in 20 years they get a couple to have sex right in front of the class for educational purposes. Would we admit that at least that would be going too far?

[Kali]

55. sure

context matters and project veritas can go fuck themselves (with a rough log instead of lubed toy)

[brooklynite]

58. Are sex toys necessary for sex?

[meadowlander]

60. For some people, yes.

Why should asexual, trans, and intersex kids not have access to information that would assist them with having fulfilling sex lives?

What is the harm in "comprehensive" sex ed also addressing information that would assist kids with more complex sexualities than "insert tab a into slot b, orgasm"?

[Act_of_Reparation]

62. I men, men aren't "necessary" for sex.

So I guess we don't need to teach kids how to put condoms on anymore.

Hooray for efficiency!

[Celerity]

65. indeed they are not

as a happily married lesbian I can assure you of that

and toys are good

[AntivaxHunters]

59. Yes we should

and while we're at it, we should teach them how to clean them properly too.

[NowsTheTime]

61. If they teach, how about including the impact of the recent SCOTUS Ruling?

......that seems important.......as compared to a year ago...

[WarGamer]

66. That's up to the Community

All communities should be able to make suggestions re: education of their children.

What's good or right for a rural county in Oklahoma isn't the same for an inner city San Francisco District.

[meadowlander]

68. Trans kids exist in rural communities too.

Why should they be denied information that would help them understand their own sexuality just because they live in a community that hates them and wants to pretend they don't exist?

[WarGamer]

70. School Counselors? Google? School Support Groups?

Are you saying the only way to distribute information about sexuality is class-wide?

Don't forget, this is how you get "prayer in school" and such things... I trust parents more than Government.

[meadowlander]

72. And why aren't cis kids told to just rely on those things?

If you are going to offer "comprehensive sex education" in schools in the first place, it should be inclusive of all of the kids who are attending it and not just cis- and hetero-normative.

[Mossfern]

67. I'm just an old fuddy duddy

Nothing against sex toys, but aren't there other things that kids aren't being taught any more, like home ec and shop? How about civics, music, art ... so many things have been cut from curricula, this just seem unnecessary - and kinda silly.

[prodigitalson]

69. exceptionally comprehensive

[MichMan]

71. When I was a college freshman in the 70's, the student activities group would show XXX rated films

in the lecture classrooms on the weekends for a couple dollars admission. Standard full length XXX Classics like Misty Beethoven, Deep Throat and Debbie Does Dallas.

Nobody seemed to object, but I'm pretty certain nothing like that would happen these days

[LudwigPastorius]

73. How long before those Project Veritas creeps, in search of a "scoop", start showing...

up in our kids' high schools?

[Act_of_Reparation]

81. Considering how so many people here bought this crap hook line and sinker...

...my guess is not long.

[Iggo]

74. It seems a bit much to me. But nothing outrageous.

But also, I’m not afraid of sex.

[Peacetrain]

78. No...

[msfiddlestix]

79. NO.

Why are we intentionally making teachers vulnerable to Sexual Misconduct by imposing a very provocative subject matter unnecessarily?

That's insane.

[mackdaddy]

82. And EVERY other kid has a smartphone with a high resolution screen and

basically unlimited access to PornHub type sites.

I am sure they will get accurate and realistic education about their bodies from those sites.

Of course probably more accurate information that from a Project Veritas story about anything.