Do you have classified documents at your house?

[Renew Deal]

If so, please have your lawyer contact the Department of Justice.

Thank you

20 votes, 1 pass | Time left: Unlimited
	Yes, I found some in the garage, basement, freezer, etc.
	9 (45%)
	Can't find any but they must be here somewhere
	8 (40%)
	Agent Mike
	3 (15%)
	1 DU member did not wish to select any of the options provided.
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[LakeArenal]

1. But to hell if I'll give 'em back!!!

[mvd]

2. Must be here somewhere

[TxGuitar]

3. Sorry, that's classified. Nt

[MontanaMama]

4. Yes but I forgot where.

Happy to give them back if I run into them again. I'm a helper that way.

[Iggo]

5. Yes. They were exactly in my garagebasementfreezer.

I’m caught.

[RobinA]

6. My House

in the States, or my other house?

[Renew Deal]

8. Pick Agent Mike if you're outside the US

[dweller]

7. I just ordered a CLASSIFIED stamp from Amazon

I’m going on a stamping frenzy this weekend …


✌🏻

[UTUSN]

9. Hah!

[onecaliberal]

10. No, I can declassify with my mind, duh!

[brush]

23. Hahahahaha. All righty then.

[imaginary girl]

11. GLOMAR

I can neither confirm nor deny!

[brush]

22. Heehee. Good one. CYA all the way.

[wendyb-NC]

12. Well if there are any

This place is such a cluttered mess, there's a snowballs chance in hell that they could be found them in this lifetime.

Good thought, though.

[Takket]

13. Classified by who? Have some steamy love letters I don't want public lol

[patphil]

14. They were in the reading rack by the toilet.

It took me 15 tries to flush them.

[agingdem]

15. I have my 54 year old marriage license

and my children's grade school reading certificates..do they count as classified documents??

[Buckeyeblue]

16. Mine our in the trunk of my car, for safe keeping.

It helps my health to know i have the secrets laying around.

[Ray Bruns]

17. I was using mine for toilet paper during the pandemic.

Does that count?

[onenote]

18. I don't even save the classified section of the newspaper.

[sdfernando]

19. Well I thought I had them here but

in checking they are not here...I think I left them in the Port-O-Potty at the nude beach recently.

[brush]

20. I did but I shredded them. Who needs that headache.

[moondust]

21. Of course. Very tasty.

[GreenWave]

24. I have Classified ads from the 80's.

I should be locked up.

[eppur_se_muova]

25. It's a sickness and I can't get over it.

My lawyer says she needs to talk to her lawyer first.

[hlthe2b]

26. May get a lot of families of hoarders excited...

"ya mean we can get the FBI to go through all this crap?"

[niyad]

30. That reminds me of a very old joke about the soviet union. A guy calls the kgb, telling

them that he saw his neighbir doing something suspicious in the stand of trees near his house. The kgb comes out, tears through the stand of trees, chops them all down. The next week, that guy calls them and tells them that he saw his neighbor doing something suspicious in the plot of dirt by his house. kgb comes out, tears through the plot, turning over the soil, combing through it. Nothing. when the kgb has left, the neighbors congratulate themselves in getting their firewood chopoed, and the garden prepared for planting.

[hlthe2b]

31. Hah! Maybe we are on to something here...

[Chainfire]

27. I am going to have the FBI come and search.

While they are at it they can find my Birth Certificate and my 2020 tax return...


Actually, I do indeed have some classified documents. Soviet documents, bought on eBay in the 90s. One is a really cool circular slide rule for calculating the amount of fallout that a commander could expect from him using a tactical nukes, based on the wind and several other factors. It included the sign-out log-book for the people who had access to it.

[sinkingfeeling]

28. I have boxes of "IBM Confidential" documents..... education documents from early

1990s.

[IcyPeas]

29. yes. they are in my file cabinet under "C"

[Hekate]

32. Agent Mike should be dropping by any day now. While he's searching, maybe he can fold laundry

I’ve missed him. Back in the day, he used to take out the trash while searching the joint. Straight arrow, that guy.

[Throckmorton]

35. He never would eat my sourdough bread,

But I could tell he was dying to sample it.

Where did all those good guys go?

[Hekate]

36. I myself would find fresh sourdough hard to resist...

I don’t know where the good guys went. It’s sad.

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

33. Propriety documents from various telecommunication companies I subcontracted for

Could be useful to those who knew WTF they are. Fortunately most aren't smart enough to do so, least of all Republicans.

[Throckmorton]

34. Yes I do.

They are all classified as Free Release, no ITAR, EAR, NOFORN, CNSI, CRD, CNPI, SECRET, TOP SECRET, DOE L, DOE Q, DOE Q COMPARTMENTED, OR SECRET SQUIRREL.
I do have a couple of tech manuals from SAGE, circa 1958 or so.

[Meowmee]

37. I already sold them

Better get a sp after me, that will take care of it 😹

[Roisin Ni Fiachra]

38. Well, yeah, but they are Russian documents hacked from Putin and the Kremlin.

Pooty likes his dominatrix to dress in various Nazi uniforms from WWII, as she screams Hitleresque orders and various gay/trans slurs at him before she begins spanking him.

[Conjuay]

39. Yeah

I've been using them for wrapping up fish.but it's okay because fish can't read.

[GGoss]

40. Oh Hell No...

I'm not letting the DOJ anywhere near my diary. No way.

[JuJuChen]

41. This thread gave me a needed lol, ty for posting it.