General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsReport: Republican Governors In MAGA solidarity, Will Mint Their Own Currency
Report: Republican Governors In MAGA solidarity, Will Mint Their Own CurrencyMarch 12, 2023
Bake D. Potato
Tallahassee, Florida (BNN) Its high time red-blooded Americans get MAGA friendly currency back in their pockets, said Florida Governor Wrong DeSantis at a Smooch Trumps Ample Rump (STAR) rally in Pennsylvania, adding, Anybody who wants to do business in God-Fearin states can soon do so using what we Republican Governors call Complicit States of America (CSA) cash. Instead of Dollars and Cents, the new Red-State Swag tradin tokens will be offered in currency units of Rubes and Oafs.
At the time of this announcement, the new denominations planned are:
1. A 1.6 Oaf coin, made of recycled shards from broken eBay-purchased Kevlar helmets, with an embossed likeness of Elmer Rhodes III, Supreme Leader of the Oafs, and commemorates January 6, 2020.
2. A Lil Rube bill, made of Gadsen yellow silk and emblazoned with an engraved likeness of Coily, the Freedom Sneck, worth 100 Oafs and commemorates January 6, 2020.
3. A Rube-A-Largo, this bill, worth 10 Lil Rubes is made of white golf-shirt polyester, emblazoned with a handsome engraving of Lord Trump proudly pointing at a golf ball in a cup. Again, this grand specimen commemorates January 6, 2020.
4. A MAGA-Rube, worth 10 Rube-A-Largos, will be a bright red bill crafted from paper-thin suede Pleather and proudly hot-stamped MAGA RUBE. A highly desirable note.
5. A Rube-Uh?-Con reloadable note honoring all Republicans, everywhere. This beautiful Rube will be lovingly made of MAGA-church quality gold-tone faux satin and can be reloaded at www.ustupidfucksbeenconned.con.
6. Rounding out this first run of CSA currency will be the largest denomination of a BS currency ever offered. This mail-away special and very charming and holy bill will be known simply as The John Baron, . made of approximately 4-6 hard pull downs of a Trump property commode single-ply toilet paper, and worth absolutely nothing.
Note: Point of contact regarding this press release is Wank Wrinkleskins, Stop 3, Bus 12, Podunk, Merica. Fuck you, very, very much, Wank Wrinkleskins replied, wryly, as he farted in DJTs general direction. ❤️🤗
Deuxcents
(16,353 posts)brush
(53,922 posts)Baked Potato
(7,733 posts)mucifer
(23,576 posts)keithbvadu2
(36,953 posts)Until you read past the headline, it looks believable.
Many right wingers would go for it.
Some folks started a silver/gold coin currency some years back.
It could only be purchased with greenbacks and always at a profit to the seller.
The gullible folks thought they were 'putting it to the man', but they were overpaying for the metal value.
Qutzupalotl
(14,335 posts)It's the perfect place for satire.
Baked Potato
(7,733 posts)Qutzupalotl
(14,335 posts)Or if here in GD, marked as satire.
Baked Potato
(7,733 posts)Peace to you.
Qutzupalotl
(14,335 posts)A lot of people only scan headlines. Face value in this case amounts to misinformation and is harmful.
Prefacing your post may detract from the humor, but that's the price pf accuracy. Or you could just post in the lounge, where it would be expected and well-received.
Baked Potato
(7,733 posts)Qutzupalotl
(14,335 posts)nini
(16,672 posts)Qutzupalotl
(14,335 posts)But there are people who don't read the post.
Plus, we have a nifty place where anything goes, and it could use some love.
sarcasmo
(23,968 posts)Permanut
(5,656 posts)DFW
(54,447 posts)On January 6, 2020, people were wondering when Joe Biden would fold his weak campaign. A year later, Trumpanzees and the Dumb Caucus tried their version of storming the Bastille (it worked in 1789, less so in 2021).
Captain Zero
(6,836 posts)with that headline.
IMHO