Not gonna sugar coat it.

[Downsouthjukin]

I fucking hate fascists. Before 2016 I had worked with and existed with people who called themselves conservatives all my life. I kind of had to because I live in one of the reddest counties in one of the reddest states in the union. It is one of the original traitor states that fought against the Union in the civil war. It is Alabama. I grew up with these people. They were my relatives, they were my friends, they were my coworkers. I was always considered a little different because my parents raised us to not be racist. We were told that it did not matter what our friends or relatives or neighbors said, no matter what language they used that disparaging anyone because of their race or even their economic status was the sorriest thing you could do.

I had a lot of friends that did. I heard all the racist jokes even participated in it some of it behind my parents back as it was just so the way of the place and the people where I lived. An example is when we were little kids when you were picking teams for something there was a rhyme that all kids here did and they did so because there were no black kids even playing with us. They were around but were off with the other. black kids. it went like this. EENY MEENY MINY MO, CATCH A N-WORD BYE THE TOE, IF HE HOLLERS LET HIM GO, ENNY MEENY MINY MO, MY MOMMA TOLD ME TO PICK THE VERY BEST ONE AND YOU ARE IT, OR NOT IT. That was literally the standard way kids were picked for teams. So growing up with that kind of stuff was just a part of life in Alabama. One of my friends that I grew up going to play with and spend the night withs father would tell us stuff like, BLACK IS BEAUTIFUL , TAN IS GRAND BUT WHITE IS THE COLOR OF THE BIG BOSS MAN. This and a lot of other shit even more disgusting. I grew up with most of my friends being people whose parents were nothing like mine. Most of them when you got right down to right and wrong were mostly decent. They grew up to be "conservative" without realizing why they were "conservative" which meant they voted republican vs Democrat. What it meant though was that WHITE PEOPLE vote Republican and black people and N-word lovers vote Democrat. Black people were referred to as democrats.

I always believed that these people that were my friends, and relatives would eventually wake up when somebody who was as openly a fraud as Trump came along. I figured they were just a product of flawed upbringing and that if it ever got as open as Trump they would turn on the Republican Party. Some did. Not many. Most of them still vote for traitors like Tommy Tuibberville over any democrat. These people are fascist. They are traitors. I hate them. All of them.

[debm55]

1. Downsouthjukin, I lived in a very blue county in a very blue(at the time) the Eeny Meeny saying was

used here too. Racism has always been a part of this country. Sad isn't it. I live in western PA.

[2naSalit]

3. It was what...

Was the standard in New England too.

[ThoughtCriminal]

2. Even though I was growing up in Alabama in early 1960s

The line we used was: "Catch a TIGER by the toe..."

I sure heard the N word from plenty of relatives, but my parents would not stand for it.

[ChazII]

6. Tiger was the word used by my peers

on the playground where I grew up.

[GuppyGal]

9. Ya my Dad taught us that and used N....we did it too for a bit but then we stopped and used

Tiger ...it just didn't feel right. He was obviously and definitely racist.

[Cha]

4. So Sorry for where you're

living and your surroundings of people who are brainwashed and aren't ever going to change.

I can't even imagine.. I hate them just from reading about them on DU. And, I've seen what trump has done to this country and the Planet when his Scourge took over the WH.. they're ALL Putin's Puppets Now.

[Joinfortmill]

5. You had nice people for parents.

[Downsouthjukin]

7. I am scared of where we are.

I have always taken for granted that the civil war was behind us. I have always felt until here lately that our justice system would protect us from where we are now. People like Trump and Desantis, and Abbott with the help from Fox News and the other propaganda outlets have us so close to the night of the long knives, the brownshirts, and the death squads of Central America in the 80's. I just pray that our DOJ is really on top of it and that a reckoning is coming. We have the traitor that incited the attempted overthrow of our democracy as the leading candidate of a party that is nothing if not illegitimate and the face of the new confederacy bent on overthrowing our form of government for its masters. It is all just too much.

[ancianita]

11. Thanks for your Alabama experience. Mine was similar, but in Florida.

I've never heard it explained as well as you've explained it, about how those who grow up 'conservative' don't really know, really, what that is, or even how ingrained it is. I feel you. It can feel dark and scary out there.

After a year in Jacksonville, a summer in Ocala and six years in Tallahassee (working in public venues), I saw, heard, experienced confederacy racism when whites thought they were with 'their people.' I moved out of the South as soon as I got the chance. Now back in Florida's west coast, I see it still here in other more subdued forms. Thus, DeSantis. The house of fear that FOX built in the last ten years has seeped into high visibility RW leadership. But it's not necessarily trickling down.

Tomorrow, in Florida, high school and college students across the state will walk out of their schools to get enrolled in I've African American Studies/Literature online classes, to register to vote and other activities. Rightly so, because they have the most to lose given the situation you've described -- their future 'life, liberty' and well being. It's a whole new generation of woke in the belly of the DeSantis beast.

When it feels like too much, I remind myself to remember the numbers, look at populations that don't live at the extremes because I know the extremes do not at all define the nation. As I practice that perspective, I see other things happening where free floating civil war lost cause racism/fascism exist in confederacy-legacy states. I see youth turning on this latest generation of parents (and political leaders, too) to the point that their parents really are re-thinking their local and family 'culture' of Rittenhouse-style celebritizing.

Keep the faith. Democracy's down, but it's not out. 77% of America did not vote GOP. In red states, youth are going to beat the gerrymander, and as we see, are running for office, getting national attention in ways that the Rittenhouse types are not.

It's going to get darker in the next 20 months, but here is where we give each other help in channeling our fears.

[vlyons]

8. I grew up in Dallas

The city where JFK was murdered. I'm 76 yr. I went to public schools, which by law were segregated. Buses had little signs above the window that said: Whites to the front. Coloreds to the back. My Dad was a cop and big racist. Wheber a black entertainer was on the Ed Sullivan show, he would change the channel. I don't know what happened to me, but as a teenager I was awakened and motivated by the civil rights movement.

[JudyM]

13. "Awakened" says it all.

Thanks for telling about this, vylons. As starkly compelling as the common humanity/social justice side is, so many laugh it off with derision… “woke”/awakened is cast as an insult to serve as an inherent shame device to keep people from seeing it’s essentially compassion vs hatred.

[calimary]

10. Well, my friend, you can always take refuge here!

Whenever I get frustrated by the disgraceful idiocy out there, I know I can always find solace, encouragement, and camaraderie in a place like this. Hanging out here will help remind you that not everybody you encounter is a political Neanderthal.

It always helps me to see proof that I’m not alone in how I feel about the issues in this country. And I always learn something enlightening and useful.

[Warpy]

12. Would you rather see them or be them?

You can hate what they say and do but hating them is just a fucking waste of time and feeds into who they are and how they live.

You do have company in Alabama. I know because I've known them online. It's not hopeless. You're not going to be able to educate people who are determined to be bigoted, pig ignorant, and self defeating, so find some who aren't if you want to stay there without getting as wadded up in hate as the people you're sick of are.

I took the geographical cure and it worked out for me. I'd lived in enough places that I had a general idea of where to go.

The south is what it is. You're not going to change it. You can either find a way to live with it (and them) or leave it. I'll warn you that assholes exist everywhere. They're just not the political majority in some other places, most of the time just a city or two in an otherwise red rural and suburban hellscape.

[Martin Eden]

14. In my home, the assassination of MLK was a tragedy

When I went to school the next day, my 6th grade classmates were in a celebratory mood. The attitude they got from their parents was Yay, we finally got him!!!

We held a mock presidential election that November. I was one of two who voted for Humphrey. Six voted for Nixon. 18 voted for Wallace.

This was on the far southwest side of Chicago, all white neighborhood near Midway Airport.

[live love laugh]

15. My bff's late husband told her he never wanted to go back to AL.

He told her he was raised there and it’s a terrible place if you are not racist.

He never went back after moving to Chicago.

[nolabear]

16. I was born in AL and raised in Gulf Coast MS, then New Orleans.

First, your screen name makes me smile. “Jukin’” is such a great Southern phrase. My granddaddy used it often. He also used other words. I learned the rhyme as you did without the family liberalism. I don’t know why I was different. I just was, always, and truly loving those family members who were so good in ways and so horrific in others was always a sobering reality for me.

I live in the cool, liberal, easy PNW now and raised my sons here. I have glorious, beautiful biracial grandsons. I know the soft racism of philosophically liberal, well-meaning people. I try to be an ally and make change where I can. It all makes me sad but the roots of love I felt from some of those bigoted people gives me a little hope. Twenty years as a shrink made me kind of philosophical too. But there are things I won’t tolerate. And I understand when others have their limits too.

[BlueTsunami2018]

17. We did the same thing in super blue Philadelphia.

The eeny meeny miny moe thing. We played a game called “N Baby in the air” and lots of other horrible things. That’s just the way it was. Literally EVERYONE was racist where I grew up. And they weren’t just racist against black people, that was just a point of agreement. The Italians hated the Irish and Vice versa, Polish people were mocked unmercifully as idiots. Puerto Ricans, Asians…everyone was hit, no one was spared. And gods forbid you were effeminate in any way. Homophobia was just as rampant.

Looking back, the amount of hate was off the charts.

Fortunately, I was able to leave that ridiculous mindset behind as I grew up. It’s nowhere near as bad now as it was back then. Things definitely have changed for the better but it’s far from completely eradicated.

[ArnoldLayne]

18. When I was around 10 years old in the late 1960's in Southeast Ohio

the kids I grew up would pick sides for teams saying the same thing. I also remember them saying after Martin Luther King was assassinated in 1968. When James Earl Ray was finally caught they would say including myself that I'm embarrassed and sadly have to admit now that the reason he really got arrested was for "Shooting Coons out of Season."

[elocs]

19. Racism is taught, overtly or by example.

I grew up in WI, but as a little boy of 4 I lived in Memphis because my dad was from Corinth, Mississippi. He was a 3rd grade dropout & a WWII combat vet. I had Black women who took care of me, but my dad would say "yes, ma'am" and "no ma'am" when he talked with them. I played with Black kids but to me they were just kids.
I lost my innocence about racism when we moved to WI when I started school. One day in the schoolyard these older kids were bullying this younger boy and it was like I was struck by a bolt of lightning when I realized it was because that boy was Black! What a sad and confusing day that was for me.

These racist Republicans have always been here. There were those who were open and proud about it and those who were more subtle and lay in the weeds concerning racism. Then came Trump, not the first or only one, but he gave these people permission to be proud of their racism and to openly embrace their hate in all things, not just race. Our Civil War and its divisions were simple compared to the America we have now.

[Jedi Guy]

20. I grew up in southern Mississippi, right on the Gulf of Mexico, so I can relate.

I recently reconnected with my best friend from high school. After he retired from the Air Force, he moved back home and settled down in our hometown. He's been spilling the tea on the people I went to school with, and sadly many of them are hardcore Trumpers.

The one that mystifies me the most is a mutual friend of ours. When we were teenagers, this guy was the biggest punk (in the punk rock sense) you could imagine. Fuck the man, fight the power, down with conformity, all of it. Twenty-five years later, he's a diehard Trump fan who just can't wait to vote for him again.

Most of these people were nice kids from good families back then. Now they're all in for Trump and his agenda. It's legit depressing.