You are NOT the father. Boebert is like a bad talk show now.

[underpants]

I actually feel sorry for her….okay that’s over

Ex-wrestler proves he's not Lauren Boebert's dad – after decades of hounding from her mom

https://www.rawstory.com/lauren-boebert-paternity/

A retired pro wrestler has passed a paternity test proving he’s not the father of Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO) – after decades of having been accused that he was by her mother, the Daily Beast reported Saturday.

Boebert confirmed to the Daily Beast that she and a man who wrestled as “Stan Lane” both took DNA tests in the past month that confirmed he was not her father. Lane, whose real name is Wallace Stanfield Lane, had been the subject of a paternity suit and public accusations by her mother – Shawn Roberts Bentz – dating back to the mid-1980s.

For Lane, the finding marks the end of a long ordeal during which Bentz, with whom he admits having a brief affair, sued him for child support and continued to accuse him after Boebert was elected to Congress.

Boebert said they all agreed the results are bona fide: “It was kind of like ya, this is it, ok!” she said. “He has been wrongfully attacked, and he doesn’t deserve that.”

[brewens]

1. Talk about keeping it classy! LOL n/t

[democratsruletheday]

35. yep....some folks are offended by

'white trash' so I'll say her and her brood are white rubbish instead.

[IbogaProject]

37. Simply Garbage

.

[Glorfindel]

2. Lucky man. I'm sure he's glad not to be the father of that obscene viper.

[TheBlackAdder]

49. I really think that she is in a mental crisis and needs to see a psychologist or a psychiatrist.

.

She's doing a lot of destructive and self-destructive things.

She's going through a divorce and might be having an affair.
She's gone full MAGA and is the wild branch of that lunacy.
She has a totally fucked up family.
She's at odds with her neighbors.
She managed to alienate her once besty MTG.
She just wants to disrupt things.
She missed the budget vote she was so set on casting.

These are all indicators that something is brewing in that low-rent dome of hers.


Now, the person who she hoped was her father turned out not to be.

She's in a mental crisis now.

.

[BunnyMcGee]

53. Oh! Good news then.

[EYESORE 9001]

3. I'm not entirely convinced

that this isn’t in the script for a reality series down the road. The pro wrestler paternity storyline should garner boffo ratings in Peckerwood Paradise.

[MagickMuffin]

4. Lauren, I am NOT your father

Sounds like mama Shawn doesn’t know who the father of her nutzy coocoo daughter is. Yikes, no telling who it is. Mama Shawn was getting it on baby!

[leftyladyfrommo]

5. She reminds me of Sarah Palin. nt

[2naSalit]

14. Only trashier...

Which used to seem impossible. Silly me.

[PatSeg]

42. Yeah trashier and a whole lot dumber

[LoisB]

75. Exactly. Who knew Boebert and Marj were waiting in the wings?

[PatSeg]

91. Ah yes, we were so nave back in those days

How many times did we think, "Whoa, can't get worse than this"? And the universe evidently took that as a challenge. Now I'm wondering if there are some out there ready to take the dumbest trophy from Lauren and Margie.

[LoisB]

96. Oh, I hope not. My sanity is already teetering on the brink.

[PatSeg]

97. Yes, I'm having a difficult time

adjusting and readjusting to the "new normal" on a regular basis. It is so disorienting and I often question reality as I know it (or KNEW it). All this nonstop crazy is not healthy for sane people.

[malaise]

6. So good for the family values party

Who’s your daddy asshole?

[underpants]

47. Boebert of late - divorce*, the 911 call, missed the Debt Limit vote,

and now this.

* look, it happens.
Empty Greene and Santos better step up their “look at me!” games.

[RandomNumbers]

99. Yah, but is it her fault she doesn't know who her father is?

I'm puzzled by most of this thread. Sure, Boebert is a horrible person in her politics and behavior, but her parentage surely isn't her own fault, or anything to pick on her about. There is plenty of stuff about her that deserves our derision, but this ain't it. Right? (what am I missing?)

[malaise]

100. Well since she thinks it's the fault of every minority child with the same problem

I don’t give a flying fugg.

[RandomNumbers]

102. You do have a point there.

I'm thinking more generally that I'm not going to model that bad behavior though. Even when the target arguably deserves it.

[malaise]

103. You're way nicer

😀😀😀

[padfun]

7. So she doesn't know who her daddy is?

Mama was sleeping around about that time. It could be anyone in that Florida town.

[Bucky]

19. Lots of people don't. We shouldn't blame people for their parents' flaws.

The problem with Boebert isn't that she's a bastard. The problem is that she's an asshole.

[AllyCat]

23. Yes, this

[LittleGirl]

30. Ding, ding, ding! lol nt

[housecat]

55. well put

[Hortensis]

105. This, of course. :)

[Javaman]

48. I blame the mom

For instilling some truly fucked up values in her daughter

[COL Mustard]

8. I'm sure Stan walked away from that

Breathing a HUGE sigh of relief!

[tblue37]

9. But Satan is still on the hook.

[WheelWalker]

12. Duzy!

[keroro gunsou]

29. Technically

You could add Belial, the lord of lies, to the hook as well.. given who and what Boebert is like, the smart money is on Beelzebubba.

[GoneOffShore]

66. Oh, I did laugh

[Rustynaerduwell]

10. I just learned today that the word 'bastard' is gender neutral.

I always pictured it as male gendered. So the sentence "They are a bastard" can refer to one person of any gender in a grammatically correct form.

[Bucky]

27. It's historically been politically relevant cause of noble hereditary fights. So less of an issue

England nearly lost out on its best monarch when Henry VIII tried to get his bastard son (also a Henry) recognized as a legit heir. Fortunately Mr Eight died before the process could finish and a few domino clicks later Liz the First got to sit on the throne.

[ExWhoDoesntCare]

112. Not how it worked

Henry VIII's illegitimate son, the Duke of Richmond, died in 1536, long before his father did (1547). Parliament floated a bill to make Richmond the legitimate heir not long after Elizabeth's birth, but it never got far because Henry believed he would produce a male heir with his new wife.

The only thing that resembled chaos about that illegitimate son and the throne was when Henry knew that Richmond was dying of tuberculosis, and it became apparent that Anne Boleyn, like Catherine of Aragon, wouldn't produce a male heir. That's when Henry came up with offing Anne and marrying someone else.

Henry was courting Jane Seymour and married her before the Duke of Richmond even died. Only 15 months after his then-only son's death, Jane Seymour gave birth to the king's only legitimate male heir.

[dalton99a]

11. So Boebert's mom couldn't tell whose penis it was

[unweird]

16. And daughter learned to identify penises first

Thus the importance of the tattooed exhibitionist penis being verified back in the day.

[LakeArenal]

28. The important part is they all keep breeding the young folk.

Just as she and the other Pukes support.

[Celerity]

104. ask mummy Shawn to pick it out of a line-up of 60 to 70 year old Florida prongers

[Bluethroughu]

13. Lol, thank you I needed that laugh.

[2naSalit]

15. Everything about her is questionable...

Maybe we could try to prove she doesn't really exist!

Yeah, that might work.

[bucolic_frolic]

17. Thanks for another episode of "I don't know who your father is!"

Public confessions hidden in drama

[Bucky]

18. Time to move on to Ric Flair

[Probatim]

41. Whether you like it or you don't, learn to love it - cause I'm the best. Thing. Going. Today!!!

WOOOOO!!!!

[underpants]

52. There's a Space Mountain connection

Championship Wrestling from Florida (1978–1980; 1986–1987)
Edit
Lane was trained by Ric Flair, debuting in 1978.[1] He initially wrestled primarily for Championship Wrestling from Florida.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stan_Lane

[Mr. Ected]

20. I love it when a Holy Roller tells us how to live our lives

When her own has been a shambles since conception.

[Historic NY]

21. Yuppers

]

[Hortensis]

22. I love it when a male author says a man "passed" a paternity test.

And didn't mean it was positive.

[AllyCat]

24. Right?

[PatSeg]

92. Oh my, I hadn't thought of that!

[Bongo Prophet]

94. In a way, I guess he passed with an 'A', for absent.

And great-grandma most definitely got a "D"

[intheflow]

25. Apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

And how have I missed that Boebert was born out of wedlock? That makes three generations! Talk about family values.




Full disclosure, I also got pregnant and had a child in my teens. I made DAMN sure my son knew about safe sex so he wouldn’t make it a family legacy. Like the Boeberts, apparently.

[underpants]

45. Cue Hank Jr.

It’s a family tradition. 🎶🎼

[3catwoman3]

69. When the news other eldest son getting his girlfriend pregnant..

…first broke, mention was made the Boebert’s mother had also been a grandmother at age 36.

Or not-so-grandmother, as the case may be.

[Hugin]

26. What was that I just felt?

It was like every male who has fuzzy recollections of being in a 1980s bar simultaneously cringed.

Odd.

[RussBLib]

31. Sounds like The Jerry Springer Show

Time to vote her out of office.

[Submariner]

73. Sounds like one of Maury Povich's "who's the daddy" shows

he used to have for many years, until recently retired.

[RussBLib]

82. Thanks. I get them confused.

Those shows are signs of the times.

[niyad]

32. just as a matter of curiosity, did this stan lane peson make money wrestling?

[Elessar Zappa]

46. He was fairly well known in the 80s

as part of a tag team called the Midnight Express. So he probably made some good money for a while.

[underpants]

50. Thanks. I had to look him up.

I don’t remember him but he was active for 17 years with some later cameo appearances

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stan_Lane

[Elessar Zappa]

56. I like to watch the old professional wrestling on Peacock.

It’s my guilty pleasure/vice.

[oldsoftie]

67. before the internet it was so much better. People kept their characters going back then

[Elessar Zappa]

68. Yeah,

“Kayfabe” was very important back then.

[oldsoftie]

71. I was going to use that word but figured no one would know it! Kudos!

[Elessar Zappa]

72. Oh I know all the insider wrestling terms lol.

Kayfabe, heel, face, shoot, etc.

[underpants]

51. 17 years active.

Last edited Sun Jun 4, 2023, 01:51 PM - Edit history (1)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stan_Lane

My wife met Ric Flair once. He wanted to buy a ring. His credit was not good so he walked out to his car, opened the trunk, grabbed some stacks of bills and paid cash. That’s how they lived especially back then. Town to town. Paid in cash. Out to the bar.

[oldsoftie]

83. Flair lived the gimmick 24/7 for decades. Lost a lot of $ in 4-5 marriages!

And spent tons of it doing just what you describe. Had some tax problems too. In the ESPN "30 on 30" story on Flair, announcer Jim Ross said "The IRS loves Ric Flair. But they want Richard Flier to pay his damn taxes!"

[underpants]

88. The Flair 30 for 30 was sad

I think I finished watching it but it was tough to watch.

The Andre the Giant documentary was inspiring. Vince MacMahon is an asshole.

[oldsoftie]

70. He made plenty of good money; he was a top name in many top storylines.

And in those days they were on the road 300 days out of the year.
But making it and KEEPING it are two different things. No idea how he's doing now. Hopefully he invested well.

[llmart]

33. I can't begin to wrap my head about where we are in this country.

Jerry Springer could have made this family an episode on his show, yet here she is a congressperson.

Again, I have to ask, what is wrong with the voters in this country who thought she'd be perfect for the job?

I think I've maybe lived too long.

[Irish_Dem]

40. We can clearly see that sociopaths/con artists/buffoons are much beloved by US voters.

Americans no longer take their civic duty seriously.
And we also have a huge moral collapse in this country.

[llmart]

95. You have summed it up perfectly in two sentences.

[Wingus Dingus]

34. Did he actually have to pay child support? Because I'd be suing someone

to recoup all the money that kept BoBo in Cool Ranch Doritos and Mountain Dew all those years.

[Hugin]

38. At the very least Lane should be allowed to recoup forty years of legal fees.

Which has got to be a sizable chunk of change.

[Bucky]

39. there's nothing there to walk away from

Two paternity tests show us that BoBo was raised a delusion mother.

[underpants]

43. Okay that made me giggle. 😆

Cool Ranch Doritos and Mountain Dew

[oldsoftie]

84. Nothing in the story says he had paid any support.

"Mom" has been hounding him since the 80s about it. Another test was taken 30 yrs ago showing he wasnt the father but the NC State tester later was found to have screwed up other tens which out THIS test into question. Dont know why it took this long to get it right

[Chainfire]

36. The dad could have been anyone on the high school football team.

[dalton99a]

44. They sure do look alike

[BunnyMcGee]

57. The second picture...

BoBo has a horror movie worthy face. Sort of like "Scream".

[oldsoftie]

62. Thats n insult to Stan!

[Judi Lynn]

86. He was a real "looker" for sure, with real fashion sense. Quiet good taste never goes out of style.

[ShazzieB]

101. I don't think he looks one bit like Bobo.

And vice versa. Among other things, he's got a wide, almost round face, and hers is long and narrow. They both have pointy chins, but lots of people have pointy chins. I wonder why Mom was so sure it was him. She obviously slept with more than one man during the month she got pregnant, but for some reason, she decided to fixate on the wrong one. Oh well, just idle curiocsity on my part, but I'll bet there's a story in there somewhere.

Maybe this is good news for the congresswoman in a way. Now she no longer has to wonder why her putative father didn't want to be part of her life. Her actual father was probably a one night stand who slipped back into the night from whence he came with ever knowing he impregnated someone.

[Artcatt]

54. I think it's entirely appropriate to mercilessly roast these

hateful, low-class hypocrites.

[Marthe48]

58. Maybe she'll get a leaf on Ancestry

n/t

[underpants]

59. I don't really know what that means but I know it's funny.

[3catwoman3]

74. If you belong to Ancectry.com, when a possible relative is...

…discovered, you get an e-mail that you have a hint, accompanied by a little picture of a green leaf, as in another leaf to add to your family tree.

[Marthe48]

76. If you take an Ancestry DNA test

you'll be connected to people who share parts of your DNA:

*********************************************************
(from Ancestry.com site) About Ancestry DNA
From discovering their ethnicity to connecting with distant relatives, the largest DNA network in the world is helping more people find the singular story in their DNA. Yours is just as unique, revealing traces of your family history—who your ancestors were and where they came from.

Nigerian? Sicilian? What are you? AncestryDNA can estimate your origins to more than 150 ethnic regions around the world—5x more regions than the next leading test.

Now it’s possible to follow your ancestors’ journeys from the old world to the new. AncestryDNA is the only DNA test with more than 190 migrations stories, so you can find out if your family is Pennsylvania Dutch or Louisiana Acadian-and even when they likely reached American shores.

You’ll also be connected to living relatives who share parts of your DNA. And since Ancestry has the unique ability to bring together DNA results with 80,000,000 family trees and billions of historical records, we can also help you fill in pieces of your family history.

*********************************************************************************

[oldsoftie]

61. More likely just a stick

[underpants]

65. 😆😆😆

Okay now THATS funny

[oldsoftie]

60. "Sweet" Stan Lane; one of the best to ever lace up the boots.

And if you ever listen to any behind the scenes stories of the "old days", there was no shortage of fans for Stan.
But I'm sure he's glad he's no longer linked to this idiot in Congress.
Isnt it something when a PRO WRESTLER goes to great lengths to get away from crazy?

[Cheezoholic]

63. "Boebert said they all agreed the results are bona fide:"

LMAO

&ab_channel=Michael

[Warpy]

64. I learned in transplant units that Daddy hadn't contributed his DNA

in roughly 15% of cases. We're just not a monogamous species, marriage until death do us part or not.

My problem with Boebert has nothing to do with her parentage or her piss poor parenting of her own kids that resulted in a son who either knew nothing about preventing pregnancy or just didn't give a shit about his partner. My problem with Boebert is her profound ignorance that has allowed her to be manipulated by a bunch of right wing think tank "handlers."

My problem is that she is gun obsessed, ignorant, and too dimwitted to know how ignorant she is. The combination is not reparable. I hope her narrow victory in 2022 is not repeated. CO deserves better.

[niyad]

80. All the things that you said, and the sheer, blatant hypocrisy.

[Warpy]

93. I can imagine the girl's family want to strangle her

after her speech about how proud she was to be a grandmother thanks to her feckless son.

I imagine the lawsuit for child support will be a doozy since her family is sensible enough not to want wedding bells to ring for them.

I don't credit her with enough brains to be a hypocrite. I think she actually bought that born again nonsense that says she can lie, cheat, steal, and kill as long as she invokes Jebus's name when she does it.

[James48]

77. "Who's your Daddy"?

Boebert doesn’t have a clue.

Just like everything else, she doesn’t have a clue.

[Deuxcents]

78. Did he get an apology or..

“It was kind of like ya, this is it, ok”

[underpants]

79. Seriously

Sounds like Mom has been following him around for quite a while. He’s surely had at least a lot of grief about this let alone maybe some legal expenses.

Look, we were together but that’s not my kid. God he had to put up with this for waaaay too long.

[oldsoftie]

85. He did say he had accepted her apology, but one wasnt quoted.

[Blue Owl]

81. Stan stayed in his Lane

[Judi Lynn]

90. Boebert's ma's a gunslinger, too.

Taken in Shooter's Bar.

[underpants]

98. Yeah I looked her up.

I was 38 when we had our daughter. Graduates high school this week.

[LowerManhattanite]

108. More like a target a buncha "gunslingers" practiced with.

Thank you. I’ll just be down here in hell.

[live love laugh]

107. She HAS to be related to Sarah Palin.

[lostnfound]

109. This thread is disgusting. Critique her for other things, NOT this.

I can’t stand her but no one is to be put down for who their PARENTS are or who they weren’t.
It’s a terrible message to send to children of unmarried people.

[Bucky]

111. Thank you, yes.

I mean, it's not like we're running out of legitimate reasons to find her loathsome.

[Skittles]

110. might help explain why she is so fucked up

that's some heavy-duty shyte