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MarianJack

(10,237 posts)
Tue Nov 13, 2012, 12:50 AM Nov 2012

A story to share with all DU parents.

I also posted this in the parenting forum.

If you haven't been throgh this yet, don't worry, you will; you WILL.

My son is an great kid. He's 12 & 1/2 and looks like a young Denzel Washington. Last Saturday he went on his first date. He and a girl his age who've been both friends and foes since 2nd grade went to see "Taken 2" and then to Barnes & Noble for cheesecake. I'd seen the young woman at school and the library a number of times, but I only just actually met her when we picked her up to go so I could take them to the movie. She's a very pretty and very intelligent young woman and I was very impressed with her.

I stood in line with them just in case I had to tell the ticket seller that the girl's parents, as well as my wife and I approved of them seeing a PG13 movie. After that I didn't see them until my wife and I met them at B&N.

As with any parent, I'm proud of the new advances my son makes and I'm also heartbroken by what's being left behind. I'm proud of how my son followed every single rule we teach him about respect for women and how to act on a date and about just being himself. We also miss the baby, toddler and little kid as we a the young man developing in their place.

Don't get me wrong. At 12, there are still more times than not that I just want to knock him through the floor, especially when he just drops things at his ass when he could have just as easily put them where they belong 8 inches away. Still in all, my wife and I are proud of him and very happy that his first date was a success. I know that they want to do it again soon.

I just thought i'd share this with my fellow parents in the DU community. As I said at the beginning, if you haven't gone through this yet, you will!

That's my 2 cents and quite possibly overpriced at that.

PEACE!

16 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
A story to share with all DU parents. (Original Post) MarianJack Nov 2012 OP
Parents rock this World...and children are some of our very best... Tikki Nov 2012 #1
Thank you, Tikke,... MarianJack Nov 2012 #9
It's a good feeling when you realize they are growing up to be defacto7 Nov 2012 #2
Thats one heck of a good 2 cents, defacto7! MarianJack Nov 2012 #10
Thanks for sharing! MuseRider Nov 2012 #3
Thanks for the kind words, MuseRider! MarianJack Nov 2012 #11
can't say I'm all that excited about the dating part liberal_at_heart Nov 2012 #4
Love your signature line. eom BillyJack Nov 2012 #7
thank you liberal_at_heart Nov 2012 #8
I'm not looking forward to my boy moving out either. MarianJack Nov 2012 #12
Great read!!!! :) BelleCarolinaPeridot Nov 2012 #5
Thanks! MarianJack Nov 2012 #13
At that age, the fun is just getting started Major Nikon Nov 2012 #6
Thank you for the advice, Major Nikon. MarianJack Nov 2012 #14
that's so sweet! renate Nov 2012 #15
They were very cute together,... MarianJack Nov 2012 #16

Tikki

(14,557 posts)
1. Parents rock this World...and children are some of our very best...
Tue Nov 13, 2012, 12:57 AM
Nov 2012

And from what you're telling us, you all are having the times of your life.

Good job...

The Tikkis

MarianJack

(10,237 posts)
9. Thank you, Tikke,...
Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:09 PM
Nov 2012

...being a parent is fun, although sometimes I want to kick his round little rump for him.

PEACE!

defacto7

(13,485 posts)
2. It's a good feeling when you realize they are growing up to be
Tue Nov 13, 2012, 01:06 AM
Nov 2012

really great people!

Oh, but I do miss when they are little ones. Really, the teens can be great too. You find you have to listen more, talk a little less but the part that's still child wants that safe place and they really still want it. It may not seem that way sometimes, but no matter how tough they want to be, it's hard growing up.

Never miss giving them a hug at least once a day. Never miss! It pays off for all of you.

Been a dad for 29 years and that's my 2 cents.

MuseRider

(34,108 posts)
3. Thanks for sharing!
Tue Nov 13, 2012, 01:11 AM
Nov 2012

I miss those days. Mine are 27 and 29 now. Neither are married but they live about 65 miles away so we are not involved unless they get really involved (then you will have to go through separation from a long term girlfriend you ended up loving that they end up not loving ).

It sounds like you are great parents and it is always so good to hear these stories, we usually only hear the failures. Every day is a new day with new problems and new wonders. I don't think there is anything I have ever done or ever will do that compares to the joys of being a parent. Keep enjoying him, it gets even better I promise .

liberal_at_heart

(12,081 posts)
4. can't say I'm all that excited about the dating part
Tue Nov 13, 2012, 01:13 AM
Nov 2012

I have told both my kids that my favorite part of being a parent is watching your children who start out as blank slates turn into the individuals that they are going to be with their own personalities, opinions, talents, likes, dislikes, fears, and dreams. Having them in my life is a priviledge. My daughter is going to be moving out soon. I don't know how I'm going to deal with that. It's going to break my heart.

MarianJack

(10,237 posts)
12. I'm not looking forward to my boy moving out either.
Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:14 PM
Nov 2012

Fortunately, it's not that close (not that far away, either).

PEACE!

Major Nikon

(36,827 posts)
6. At that age, the fun is just getting started
Tue Nov 13, 2012, 01:19 AM
Nov 2012

Last edited Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:52 PM - Edit history (1)

My kids are 16 and 23. My son is the oldest. After my son hit puberty he gradually started getting an independent streak. It was hard to deal with at first because things were definitely changing. He would do things like you're describing with your child and we would get upset, which definitely didn't help things. A good friend of mine is a psychologist and really put things in perspective. She said you have to change with your child. Rather than just being dictatorial, you have to incorporate them into the decision making process which means really listening to them, accepting their input, and working together as a family. At that stage, you can't just adopt a my way or the highway mentality which worked so well when they were 8.

MarianJack

(10,237 posts)
14. Thank you for the advice, Major Nikon.
Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:17 PM
Nov 2012

My wife and I know that we don't have all the answers, although our son thinks that HE does.

PEACE!

renate

(13,776 posts)
15. that's so sweet!
Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:34 PM
Nov 2012

He sounds like a darling. And I TOTALLY KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN ABOUT PUTTING THINGS AWAY (sorry, didn't mean to yell... guess I just had to vent). I eventually pretty much gave up on that, even though picking up after them drives me crazy. Their brains don't process the world like ours do and they just don't see putting things away, or doing anything they don't feel like doing, as a priority. At all. But that's okay. It's just their nature.

It's such a bittersweet joy to have moments like your son's first date. It's sad at the time but afterwards you're just so darn proud of who they're becoming.

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