Pic Of The Moment: Crisis Averted

[EarlG]

Mike Johnson Admits His Son Monitors His Porn Viewing

[spanone]

1. K&R

[niyad]

2. Sick, twisted, creeeeeeeeeeeepy.

[IronLionZion]

3. Right, dude didn't want his wife to monitor it

totally normal

[niyad]

4. Added thought-- does that software reflect consuming the porn

in their bible?

[rubbersole]

10. Just Ezekiel 23:20.

A book banning reference for holier than thou Christians.

[Ray Bruns]

5. What a fucking weirdo.

[samnsara]

6. this is just ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

[Warpy]

58. No one ever introduced that guy to the concept of

too much information.

I agree, ew. Just ew.

[LetMyPeopleVote]

7. K&R

[chouchou]

8. Mr. Johnson

The operative thought is: Thou doth protest too much
You know Sir, people don't usually make such a big deal about subjects like that.
Think of someone who is not telling the truth...
"I didn't steal the cookie..No No I swear, I had nothing to do with that delicious cookie..Really
I didn't do it..I swear!!!!"
(Actually, everybody knows you ate the damn thing)

[yorkster]

9. New news category. - TMITWNTK

Yes, it's tmi, but we absolutely need to know it.
What a creep.

[coprolite]

11. Want to bet he has two phones

one to report to his son and another for the hairy hand stuff.

[KS Toronado]

16. My thoughts also, welcome to DU.

[whopis01]

39. He has one that his son, Jack, is on

and other one is his Jack off phone.

[treestar]

46. Exactly, easy fix, so why is he reporting this?

Why is he even thinking about it? Being a good Christian, he should hardly know such stuff exists!

[AllyCat]

63. But, of course...

[progressoid]

12. Gotta wonder if there was a wager involved. Was this a contest?

[underpants]

30. I'm out!

[SpankMe]

13. Creepy, yeah

But I don't believe for a single moment that a 17 year old American male doesn't masturbate and never accesses a booby pic once in a while. If he does manage to avoid the fap and has never seen a pic containing a female's areola, then he's extremely abnormal. EXTEMELY.

1. I hope this kid doesn't die from embarrassment at his father's bizarre disclosure. 2. No girl's going to want to date this kid after this.

[underpants]

28. He's trying to avoid DOUBLE HELL!

[NowISeetheLight]

47. Thanks

I just spit up some barcardi and Coke on my dog who was sitting in my lap.

[underpants]

48. I used to follow Fappy on Facebook

Put down the drink.

The story came from a parody/comedy site. They created this character who supposedly went to elementary schools to warn kids about the dangers of “shaking hands with the unemployed” as some call it. The fake news story was that Fappy got caught ….you know…IN costume peeping in the window of a hot yoga studio.

Now I’m giggling. Hot yoga is the to me.

[prodigitalson]

54. wow I'm 55 and today I learned "shaking hands with the unemployed"

this is what they mean by 'be a lifelong learner'

[underpants]

59. Third party

A friend told me he had a coworker who went to William & Mary. A professor opened up discussion one day with nicknames for masterbation. That’s where it came from.

[3auld6phart]

57. Wellfa

90%. of us do it. The other 10% are liners.. that round head is fuckin’ creepy.. Typical fundamentalist puke.I’d bet he is Channelling Dennis Hastart.

[VGNonly]

14. Can I do it until

I need glasses ?

[Whiskeytide]

38. I'm sorry. I can't read what you posted. N/T

[TeamProg]

15. Kick

[NNadir]

17. There's a Yiddish word for this guy.

"PUTZ"

He is remarkable in one sense. He's able to make the previous Putz, Kevin McCarthy look good.

[CTyankee]

18. This is just bizarre. Just when you think they can't get any weirder...

they do...

[louis-t]

19. A lady I worked with in 1978 told me

her son "doesn't look at the women in bikinis" in the car magazines they had laying around the house. I said "so you're telling me he isn't normal?"

[speak easy]

41. She was tell you he's gay?

[Duncan Grant]

20. I'm not enmeshed with my son; I'm a good Christian parent.

I won’t be judged by nonbelievers.

(Trust me, this is exactly how this dysfunction is rationalized.)

[orangecrush]

21. Not the Onion

Satire is dead.

[Submariner]

22. Did Mike's Johnson go to UCLA?

[underpants]

29. Well if that don't take the cake

[Cyrano]

23. Do you suppose that, at some point, he'll introduce a bill against masturbation?

This is one seriously fucked up person. And he's in a position of great power.

[sop]

34. God did kill Onan for spilling the seed.

"And what he did was wicked in the sight of the Lord, and he put him to death" (Genesis 38:10). Apparently, the bible is now the law of the land. The GOP's Onan Bill will be passed soon.

[Initech]

24. Creeeeeeeepy AF.

[JoseBalow]

25. They're Acountabilibuddies!

[PatSeg]

26. Damn, just when I thought he couldn't get weirder

Oh Mikey, that's too much information. Ugh.

[pfitz59]

27. No mention of the wife or daughters

Does he suppose women don't masturbate, or watch porn?

[Cyrano]

31. To him, women are property.

I'm not sure what property is or isn't allowed to do in his demented worldview.

[Traildogbob]

32. I have to wonder

If he “adopted” the black young man to be able to “Fill the Void” for the females in his life. This freak reeks of extremely small penis syndrome.
His Little Johnson may be freakier than trumps mushroom. That may be why trump loves him so much.

[TurboDem]

33. Are we just going to ignore the fact that his son's name is Jack?

[EarlG]

35. Not only that...

His last name is Johnson.

[keep_left]

50. The jokes almost write themselves.

Hopefully the writers from the late-night shows are paying attention.

[nolabear]

36. They talked about the definition of "porn" at length.

And width. And girth. They looked at videos for hours just to be sure they understood. They check in regularly to be sure they’re on the same page.

Yeeeesh.

[sop]

37. Looks like Republicans elected a new House Chaplin, not a Speaker.

[donheld]

40. How does someone get access to the internet without a bank account?

Questioning minds want to know.

[FakeNoose]

42. Someone else is paying his phone & cable bills

... and every other bill he owes.

I'm wondering how he got a mortgage? How does he pay his taxes?

Sheesh!

[JohnnyRingo]

43. Sounds like one of them found Incognito Browsing from Google.

No matter. If there's one thing determined teens can do it's out tech dad and do what they want.
That dog collar the old man has around the kid's neck slips on & off easier than Mike Johnson knows.

[NowISeetheLight]

44. Ewww Gross

I can't even imagine having something like this when I was a kid with my Dad. I remember finding copies of Penthouse behind a mirror in our Sauna. My Dad's old hiding place. This is just plain ewwww grossss!!!!!

[JanMichael]

45. Does it catch him looking at magazines?

Or is that not a thing anymore?

[GreenWave]

49. burner phone dude!

[mysteryowl]

51. I'm looking forward to what our national comedians will do with this!

[bringthePaine]

52. yeah right🤣even if true, still can't clear the perv hurdle💩

[SWBTATTReg]

53. I agree w/ some of the posters, Ewwww. TMI. And what does he gain by blabbering this to the whole

world, is he looking for an award of some kind? I thought that if one was in Christ, you don't go around bragging about it.

[dmr]

55. So, they each have a burner phone.

I don't know why he felt the need to disclose this -- unless of course he got caught by someone who he fears would tattle on him.

[Skittles]

56. this man gets creepier by the day

something is seriously wrong with Mikey

[kimmylavin]

60. Super creepy, but I have another question.

Because it sounds like he's saying he's got an app that scans the contents of his phone, and sends a report of it.

He, a United States Representative, has an app that scans his phone, looks for anything he might deem "objectionable," and then sends off a report through a third party.

Does that seem like a security issue to anyone else?

[YoshidaYui]

61. i think the reason why most REPUBLICANS don't watch porn is because

they will either go insane, or their body parts explode early, and than they go insane.

[AllyCat]

62. Hey EarlG! What about putting DU on Threads?

Large progressive movement building there.