Every day I come here hoping to read that TFG has died

[BWdem4life]

Since it's probably not gonna happen before Christmas, let's just pretend. Now, of course, we wouldn't want to be accused of "grave-dancing" so let's all say something nice. I'll start:

He finally did something of which I approve!

[PJMcK]

1. It isn't going to happen

As Billy Joel wrote, "Only the good die young."

Regardless, if I'm still around when Trump croaks, I'll enjoy that day immensely.

[SheilaAnn]

2. When I think about all of the sweet and good people I have known who died, it just appalls me that he is still alive. nt

[Rorey]

19. The problem is the funeral, and the lying in state stuff

It would be nauseating.

But then it would be over, and I think that talk of him would fade away rather quickly. That would be a very good thing.

[Ocelot II]

24. But the thing about funerals is that they don't happen unless somebody is dead.

If he lies in state, that's at least proof that the miserable SOB is finally going to his toasty warm eternal reward. Of course, the MAGAts would want him pickled and put on display in a glass case like Lenin.

[Rorey]

29. Don Jr. would no doubt insist that it's fake news....that he's not really dead

There's an episode of "The Twilight Zone" in which a guy dies but refuses to accept it. Pieces of him start falling off as he's decaying, but he keeps on thinking that he's still alive. I need to look that up. It was a good one.

Correction: It's "Tales From the Darkside"

[orleans]

52. i don't remember that episode but i used to really like tales from the darkside nt

[Rorey]

55. "A Case of the Stubborns"

1984

[orleans]

62. thanks.

i haven't played this yet but...

[Pinback]

69. Ha, good one!

Based on a 1976 Robert Bloch short story of the same name. Sick humor at its finest.

https://www.robertbloch.net/stories-778274.html

[MuseRider]

39. I dunno

Lenin does not look all that great but then if they could keep tfg cool enough his makeup would hold its lovely shade of rotten pumpkin so who knows?

[Ocelot II]

41. He doesn't look normal alive, so being dead shouldn't affect his looks that much

as long as they can keep him from spoiling.

[Diamond_Dog]

79. His handlers could store him in a cooler

and wheel him out on a dolly like Hannibal Lecter and prop him up behind a lectern. His worshippers won’t be able to tell the difference.

[yellowdogintexas]

54. He should be treated like Floyd Collins was: put on display deep underground

in a glass topped coffin. This should of course be a cave which is far off the beaten path though so no one will want to go out of their way to get there. An ugly cave which would not attract tourists; a "hobby cave' for some landowner. Theoretically he could have visitors but nobody would want to go there.

The history of Floyd Collins is quite interesting. Entrapment and death in Sand Cave, burial, exhumation, national tour, display on cave tours, theft of body, return of body minus a leg, display again and closing off as a tourist attraction when the cave he was in became part of Mammoth Cave National Park. Floyd is the most famous person in the world that you never heard of.

Eventually he was buried in a family cemetery within the Park.

Putting TFG truly underground where folks could get to him but won't want to go to all that trouble would be like a circle of hell for him.

[Pinback]

71. In San Francisco! Or maybe Chicago. (nt)

[ChazInAz]

104. Let's take an idea from Classical Rome.

It was illegal to have burials and tombs within the city, so cemeteries lined the roads leading into Rome. Many sepulchers were provided with a bit of plumbing and a funnel to the outside, for the purpose of providing vinous libations to the dead. A nice, thoughtful custom.
Unfortunately, travelers in need of a "rest stop" would frequently avail themselves of this feature for a wholly unintended purpose.
Let us do the same, when this turbulent malefactor goes the way of all flesh.(He has so much of it!) In a truck stop on a major east-west freeway: an oval trough surrounding and draining into a glass-topped coffin, with "Hitler's Face" playing on a sound system.

[ChazInAz]

49. Not only that.

The MAGATs will be jumping up and down demanding that he lie in state in the Capitol rotunda for a year or so.

[RKP5637]

27. OMG, they'll do what they did for Reagan, all week long.

[ChazInAz]

51. That was an utterly groteque display.

And completely undeserved honor.

[calimary]

94. "Grotesque" is quite an excellent word for it.

[Seinan Sensei]

40. Like with Limbaugh

Gone. Forgotten. Never contributed a damn thing to decent society.

[calimary]

96. And that's the best part: "Gone. Forgotten."

And almost instantly IRRELEVANT.

[EddieOnTheMesa]

56. Good Place

To take a PISS.

[CentralMass]

84. Festering in state would be more accurate.

[LeftInTX]

26. I figure by then, he will have long become irrelevant.

It seems these types live forever.
Look at Kissinger. When he died, I didn't care. He was too old to cause destruction.

I grave danced when Scalia died!

(That one didn't turn out too good)

However, if they are retired and out of circulation, I really don't care.

____

Just found out a founding member of the Dixie Chicks died yesterday. It's in the post next to this one.
Only the good die young.

[paleotn]

31. I keep thinking he's pushing his chips. Something's got to give.

[BonnieJW]

44. National holiday

It should be proclaimed a national holiday.

[birdographer]

45. Being around

when he finally keels over is one of the driving forces keeping me well.

[PJMcK]

48. Stray well, friend

There are many more reasons to be well than waiting for Trump's demise!

Happy holidays to you and those you hold close.

[Freddie]

75. "I hope I live long enough to savor

That when they finally put you in the ground
I’ll stand on your grave and tramp the dirt down”

Elvis Costello wrote that song in honor of Margaret Thatcher but the sentiment fits TGF perfectly.

[Dulcinea]

90. Eventually everyone dies.

It's the great equalizer.

[FHRRK]

3. There is a joke about this

An old guy goes to a Newstand in Manhattan every day, throws down his money for a copy of the Times, looks above the fold, tosses the paper back on the pile.

After about a month the Newstand owner asks he why he buys a paper and just looks at the front page. Old guy tells him, I am looking for an obituary.

Owner tells him the obits aren’t front page.

Old guy responds, “when this Mother Fucking Monster dies it will be front page.”

[sorcrow]

4. Me too.

And should I wake up in the middle of the night, I also do a quick check.

I'm not a praying man, but .....



Optimistically yours,
Sorghum Crow

[getagrip_already]

5. I dont want to see him dead....

In hospice care in great pain and discomfort is just fine. Let him have a long life that way.

[dalton99a]

15. +1. I want him to experience pain and suffering

Unremitting pain, and unable to recognize Ivanka as his wife

[Rorey]

20. "Ivanka as his wife"

[speak easy]

34. Disagree.

I am not willing to tolerate a 1in 1000 chance that he could win in 2024. Better that he departs in 2023.

[housecat]

67. It has to be final. Zero chance if he is dead.

[Thunderbeast]

32. Cared for by a beautiful nurse born in Nambia!

I want him to beg her for morphine and an ass wipe.

[DJ Porkchop]

53. A broken hip from a fall would do him in.

Can't run if you can't walk. Lots of pain, long recovery.
One can dream.

[GoodRaisin]

105. I do, as soon as possible.

And I don’t care how. I’m tired of his lies, his face, his magats. For godsakes die already.

[Ocelot II]

6. I have one of those fitness watches that vibrates when there's a news alert

transmitted from my phone. Every time the damn thing vibrates I hope it's THAT news flash. Alas, no luck so far... In principle I tend to oppose grave dancing, but I'll be getting out my toe shoes and tutu for that one very special dance.

[AnotherMother4Peace]

7. 5th rec. because I do the same. NT

[hlthe2b]

8. Timing is everything. If he were to go now, not only would MAGA make a martyr out of him...

but he would have escaped ALL justice and responsibility for his entire miserable existence. And THAT would have been his final (undue) victory.

That said, I think it would be a tradeoff most would gladly accept. sigh...

[Irish_Dem]

10. The cult is so crazy, they'll figure out a way to elect him dead or alive.

[Sailingdiver]

14. ain't that the truth

[Ocelot II]

36. It would be a "Weekend at Bernie's" kind of thing

where Mike Johnson, MTG and coked-up Don Jr. drag his corpse around from rally to rally, prop him up at a lectern and play old recordings of his rants - at least until he starts to smell even worse than he did when he was alive, and bits start falling off.

[Irish_Dem]

81. Don't laugh, nothing would surprise me.

Even Don Junior taking on the mantle and running in Trump's place.

PS I think Trump's bits have been falling off piece by piece for years.
There may not be much to bury at the end of the day.
Just his wig and his bronzer.

[Emile]

9. I know exactly how you feel. I'm so sick of

that stinky piece of shit.

[badhair77]

11. I think death is the only thing that can stop him.

[dalton99a]

12. He'll be alive for a while - father died at 93, mother died at 88.

[Hekate]

17. While his evil father lingered in the Twilight Zone of Alzheimer's, Donald & his siblings picked the bones...

…and squabbled over the juicy bits. That was about the time they decided how they were going to rob Mary and her brother of their true inheritance, among other things.

I think that’s how Donald is going to end up with his own children.

[Dulcinea]

91. They'll all be fighting at the casket over their inheritances. nt

[Rorey]

21. I think that his father was a little more disciplined about his health

I don't know for sure, but I don't think Fred was a glutton like Donald is.

[birdographer]

50. BUT

did they eat only McDonalds and fried chicken and drink 12 diet Cokes a day? Did they get any exercise at all? Did they have the stress of the world hating them? Hopefully this stuff will lead to his early demise.

[Sailingdiver]

13. I can't recall who made the statement

I don't wish anyone death, but I will enjoy reading their obituary.

[Ocelot II]

16. It's sometimes attributed to Mark Twain, but it was Clarence Darrow who said

“I’ve never wished a man dead, but I have read some obituaries with great pleasure.”

[Celerity]

98. Original:

“One reason why we don’t kill is because we are not used to it. I never killed anybody, but I have done just the same thing. I have had a great deal of satisfaction over many obituary notices that I have read. I never got into the habit of killing. I could mention the names of many that it would please me if I could read their obituaries in the paper in the morning,” Darrow said in a 1922 speech before the Illinois Conference on Public Welfare, according to Quote Investigator.

https://eu.usatoday.com/story/news/factcheck/2021/02/19/fact-check-clarence-darrow-quote-obits-misattributed-mark-twain/4507308001/

[Chainfire]

18. You aren't the onliest one. ;)

[MyNameIsJonas]

22. I'd settle for a massive stroke.

[malaise]

23. IHDY

I check daily

Happy Holidays. 🎄 🎄 🎄 🎄

[Bev54]

25. If he died, I am sure you will hear the celebrations in the streets, will be no need for the news.

[hydrolastic]

97. My wife and I decided if he dies....

We are going to host a party that will be epic and people will remember for a lifetime. I have feelers out for a live band that will organize for the event. They will also play if he goes to prison or possibly if he is disqualified on the 14th amendment. We don't hate the guy we just want a good reason for a party !

[BigmanPigman]

28. I have been starting my day

hoping that when I read DU Breaking News and turn on MSNBC I will have my wish for the past 7 years granted. I'm glad I'm not the only person waking up with this bit of hope. I used to want his to suffer in excruciatingly, agonizing pain for the rest of his life. Now I just want him dead ASAP. So does my family.

[LakeArenal]

30. I don't want him taking up that much space in my head.

Especially first thing in the morning.

[LeftInTX]

35. I don't think his death is eminent. The odds of death on a given day or between now and Nov 2024 are kinda low.

[The Unmitigated Gall]

33. I will for my part, Futterwacken...vigorously.

And I do mean VIGOROUSLY.

[niyad]

58. As will I!

[Martin68]

37. My fingers have been crossed for years now.

[Martin Eden]

38. Reminds me of the story of a man who bought a paper every day at the newsstand

He would look at the front page, then throw the paper away in disgust.

Finally, the newsstand guy asked why he threw the paper away after glancing at the front page.

"I'm checking to see if someone died," the man replied.

"But sir, the obituary section is towards the back section of the paper."

"When this sonofabitch dies, it will be on the front page!!!"

[Joinfortmill]

42. The Universe has spoken.

[aka-chmeee]

43. Whenever it does happen,

I hope I last long enough to make it through the long, long line for my turn to urinate on his grave.

[bluestarone]

47. Tis the season for him to be visited by 3 spirits

1) the spirit of death. 2) the spirit of death. 3) the spirit of death. THAT works for me.

[onecaliberal]

57. You're in good company.

[niyad]

59. That has been one of my most fervent wishes since 11/10/2016.

[AnrothElf]

60. "Twice-impeached, four-times-indicted, one-term former US President dead at 77"

"Nation rejoices as sources close to the turtle-heading turd-blossom say he was throwing ketchup at the wall and choked to death on a chunk of overcooked steak in the middle of screeching, 'Witch hunt!' one last time."

It's satire. Not very good, but hey... we all have our strengths and weaknesses.

[pandr32]

61. I hold that same hope every morning.

Pretending is fun. I do it all the time.

[MOMFUDSKI]

63. Every morning since he became prez I put the

TV on and hope for that news. EVERY MORNING

[Stinky The Clown]

64. Following your lead, Sparkly and I often ask each other in the AM as we start our day: Is that motherfucker still alive?

[claudette]

65. I hope every day

to read that he is in prison for his crimes. Americans need to know that justice still reigns in our country.

Edit to add: I don't get a good feeling by waiting for someone to die. Not to say you shouldn't, but Karma can be ugly.

[BWdem4life]

83. In this case, it's our only hope.

He'll never go to prison, and the only alternative to that and death is he becomes dictator.

[Smackdown2019]

66. When it does happen

His name will be in disgrace and his family will falter into the seams of the floorboards of their deplorable hotels... OOPS, those be a thing of the past shortly for No Business in the NY State. Either way, everything will fall that he close to or been around.... as well the GOP

[Efilroft Sul]

68. If Trump died, and the sooner the better, it would do much to restore sanity to this country.

The Orcs among us would lose all sense of focus, just like when Sauron fell in The Lord of the Rings. Sure, they'll know enough to ride his corpse for a week or so, like the Republicans did with Reagan, because the Dark One must be venerated in death. But when that coffin is topped with dirt, they'll have to figure out if there is any heir apparent who appeals enough to their hatred or if they'll be disengaged from politics for a long while. My money is on their disengagement, because nobody hates like Trump. That's why he's worshipped. Trump dying from natural causes would do much to pull this nation back from the brink of fascism.

[angrychair]

70. Thought I was the only one

[musclecar6]

72. If he dies

Anytime soon, there will be dancing in the streets, just like when Joe won the election. Perfectly fitting after his exit.

[republianmushroom]

73. Well don't consider yourself a minority of only one.

[Sky Jewels]

74. I can't believe we've had to have that piece of shit live in our heads

every goddamn day for more than seven years -- or eight, if you started paying attention to him during the primaries. Every fucking day we're forced to think about his treason and his repulsiveness and his stench and his moronic cult and his raping and his racism and his Putin-fluffing and his corruption and his lies and the untold damage he's done to this country and to the entire planet. ENOUGH. I need a blood clot to take him out NOW.

[Freddie]

76. Considering what's "trending" today

He’s probably decomposing in advance. We can hope.

[CanonRay]

77. No matter how or when he dies

The Deep State will get the blame from the cult.

[samnsara]

78. i keep checking my phone every day for the same news!

[kimbutgar]

82. That is my dream also, make the nightmare of him go away!

He’ll become a martyr for the christofascists and then the stories will come out that he was an evil sob.

[Chautauquas]

85. When it finally happens

it will be the first time in his life he did the right thing.

[hydrolastic]

95. My wife and I decided that if this happens,

We are going to host a party that will be epic and people will remember for a lifetime I have feelers out for a live band that will organize for the event. They will also play if he goes to prison or possibly if he is disqualified on the 14th amendment. We don't hate the guy we just want a good reason for a party !

[BWdem4life]

100. I hope they know some Weird Al

The song "One More Minute" comes to mind.

[jcgoldie]

87. The bad news is he didn't die

The good news is that twitter is abuzz because he smells like he's dead.

[Buns_of_Fire]

88. Actually, he's been dead for some time now.

Think audioanimatronics. What else explains his near-flawless air-accordion performances? Or his "dancing" at the hate rallies?

But there's only so much you can do with servos, compressed air, and an Intel 4004 processor.

[Pachamama]

89. Several Days ago I Dreamt the Fat Orange Terd died

In the dream it was this Spring - right before the trial with Judge Chutkin began. Don’t remember the cause - only that he keeled over dead. His supporters who already think JFK Jr is still alive started believing he was really in hiding.

I just remember waking up feeling happy.

So mote it be.

[Silent3]

92. I have mixed feelings about Trump dying

The best thing about it would be that his death would utterly, completely guarantee Trump would never be President again. The comfort and safety of knowing that is worth a lot.

However, on the vindictive side, I'd much rather Trump suffer the humiliations of both losing the election and being convicted of multiple felonies, facing several years of punishment (hopefully not as comfy as house arrest) before he finds release in death.

On the practical side, I think (but without great certainty) that Trump living long enough to lose the next election and being convicted for many of his crimes would be an important step in trying to heal some the damage that he and the ever-more-fascist-and-corrupt Republican party have caused this country.

[DemocraticPatriot]

99. TFG can't die, until "sleepy Joe Biden" kicks his ass,

one more time....

[FeelingBlue]

101. I think the country might be better served...

If the Angel of Death might be stayed for a while. For the sake of this country, I’m wishing he would develop such a disfiguring or disabling condition, stroke perhaps, that his weakness and brokenness would be made visible and audible. Finally, his followers might see him for the unfit person he is. If he were paralyzed on one side and had stroke-type speech, even Trump’s illusions about himself would fade a bit. Death would make him a martyr. Stroke would make him- and some of his followers —fade away. Then, his family and money can still have him and look after him in a way that reflects their love and admiration for him- whatever that is.

[CTyankee]

102. methinks it might just be bad karma to do this.

Also unproductive at some point. We can be more productive taking action.

[tavernier]

103. I don't wish for anyone's death, but can you imagine if he and Putin died on the same day

There would be fireworks and parades around the world like no New Year’s Eve has ever seen!

[themaguffin]

106. You wouldn't need to come here. Such news would be absolutely everywhere, followed by Q conspiracies.