Republicans Accuse Democrats of Plotting to Nominate Winning Candidate

[Zorro]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Calling it “the most crooked conspiracy in American history,” on Sunday Donald J. Trump and other Republicans accused Democrats of plotting to nominate a winning presidential candidate.

“I’ve seen the Democrats do some pretty evil things, but I never thought they’d choose a nominee with a chance of winning,” Trump said. “This should never be allowed to happen in our country.”

“What we are witnessing is no more and no less than a shameless scheme to mount a successful election campaign,” House Speaker Mike Johnson charged. “As God is my witness, this will not stand.”

Senator J.D. Vance attacked the Democrats’ “blatant use of strategy” and warned of more sinister machinations to come.

“In a matter of days, be prepared for them to announce that they’ve chosen a qualified and appealing VP candidate,” Vance said. “We Republicans would never do that.”

https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/republicans-accuse-democrats-of-plotting

[GreenWave]

1. Good read, but I suspect it was ready and waiting for some time (No mention of Harris)

[wnylib]

2. An indication of the political atmosohere of this year

is that, when I read the OP title, it did not cross my mind that it might be satire until I opened it to read the content.

[Xavier Breath]

3. That's great.