Trump: "If Jesus came down and was the vote counter, I would win California."

[Dennis Donovan]

Link to tweet

Ted Lieu
I’m just an ordinary Catholic, but I’m thinking that Jesus probably wouldn’t come down for a man found liable by a jury for sexual assault.

And since Jesus invented the laws of the universe, including math, He would certify that Trump lost California. And GA, NV, AZ, WI, MI, PA.

Republican Voters Against Trump
Trump: "If Jesus came down and was the vote counter, I would win California."

Video at link

I mean, what serious candidate for POTUS says that? "Weird" is to weak of a description for his kind of insanity.

[Think. Again.]

1. Apparently trump thinks...

...that it's normal for different people to get different results from counting the same things.

Weird? Or cheating?

[jcgoldie]

2. exactly...

Jesus or no Jesus how fucking backwards is it to focus not on how many people vote for you, but instead on who counts them. Its like he doesn't even believe numbers can be true. Similar to when he repeatedly said that there wouldn't be covid if they would stop testing.
Its as if objective reality doesnt exist, only what people believe. No wonder he appeals to evangelicals.

[2naSalit]

4. Numbers...

Only mean what you want them to mean, in his worm infested mind. It's how he operates on all levels.

[localroger]

41. Trump thinks numbers mean what he says they mean

With apologies to Humpty Dumpty.

[Danmel]

14. He is a text book example of Piaget's theory

Of childhood development. Usually once you're in Kindergarten you understand that you can still be seen if you're under the covers.
Clearly developmentally, he's about 4.
With apologies to toddlers.

[jcgoldie]

64. nailed it!

Put the cookie behind your back... child starts balling... NO COOKIE!

[mopinko]

13. it's how it worked for him until

letisha james caught up w him.

[orthoclad]

22. The Reich Wing denies objective reality

Opinions count as much as facts, doing own research, if T says it's so then it's true, etc.
Covid made this glaringly obvious.

[3catwoman3]

63. And don't forget about those "alternative...

…facts,” in case you don’t like those pesky real ones.

[orthoclad]

73. They have seriously undermined the notion of reality

Big Bro says War Is Peace.

Forget those pointy-head nerds with their computers and math. Alpha males don't need that!

[Emile]

3. Well apparently Jesus doesn't want to. Weird

that Trump thinks that.

[2naSalit]

5. IF...

There was a jesus and he could come down...

It's more likely that he would "come down" merely to strike the bastard with a bolt of lightning.

[orthoclad]

23. Sociopaths believe the cosmos revolves around them,

deities are just bit players in their show.

[FM123]

39. Exactly!

[kentuck]

6. In other words...

Jesus would cheat for me?

[FakeNoose]

36. Hardly ... and even the MAGAs know it

[oasis]

70. Good one

[anamnua]

7. 'The people who cast the votes decide nothing.

The people who count the votes decide everything.’

— Joseph Stalin.

[orthoclad]

25. He got that from Bannon.

[Celerity]

8. Jesus (as a concept, as I am an atheist) would toss Trump and the MAGAts into the pit of fire, if he came back to kick

off Armageddon.

[Delmette2.0]

33. My first thought was along that line was

"Oh, Donald, you are going to Hell for that lie."

[GopherGal]

54. In my limited understanding of the foretelling of the Second Coming...

I believe His arrival would be either preceded or accompanied by the Rapture, in which all True Believers would ascend to Heaven.

So I guess Dastardly Donnie agrees with me that the remaining Californian voters would be predominantly drawn from his voting pool?

[DFW]

9. Trump must be farther gone than even I suspected. He's confusing Jesus with Stalin.

"Those who cast the votes decide nothing. Those who count the votes decide everything."

--attributed to Soviet dictator Josef Stalin

**on edit--I just saw that someone else already cited the Stalin quote in a prior post.

[twodogsbarking]

10. It's Jesus. He's calling from upstairs.

Don't cross him.

[livetohike]

11. That would be a miracle. So I agree with Trump. It would

take a miracle for Trump to win California.

[twodogsbarking]

12. Jesus Christ.

[dalton99a]

15. .

[GoCubsGo]

16. Trying to win back those Evangelicals that he's losing.

And, to sort of quote John Fugelsang, every time Trump mentions Jesus, an angel coughs up blood.

[LetMyPeopleVote]

17. TFG is truly delusional

[Javaman]

18. and here we go. channeling his deep seated god complex. NT

[dlk]

19. The level of delusion required for someone to make this kind of statement is astounding

Trump is seriously unwell and is thoroughly unqualified to run for president, let alone possess any real qualifications for the job. The fact the mainstream media continues to prop him up is nothing less than horrifying.

[allegorical oracle]

50. Yep...was wondering "what if your boss made this statement?" nt

[Joinfortmill]

20. He's a megalomaniac. And a scourge upon our nation. I hate him.

[twodogsbarking]

21. He did come back.

[Orrex]

24. Evangelicals positively swoon over pandering bullshit like this

Trump has spent a lifetime embodying the seven deadly sins and breaking every commandment, but as long as he periodically parrots the right godly propaganda, evangelicals will quiver and throb their way to the ballot box even as they sell their SNAP benefits in order generate cash to donate to him.

They're a dangerous kkkult of ignorant racist fuckheads.

[allegorical oracle]

26. For the second time in two weeks he also claimed that "God

saved me so that I can save the world" during his Dr. Phil interview. He's really pushing his "divinity" to his devout followers.

[The Magistrate]

31. He Said God Believed in HIM

That his not being killed meant God believed in HIM as the person to save the country.

I don't think even a Jesuit could save him from the bonfire....

[mwb970]

27. Idiotic moron says what now?

[The Magistrate]

28. Adultery, As A Sin, Looms Quite Large In the 'Red Letter' Passages

And it is clearly stated in words ascribed to the Christ that a divorced person commits adultery in taking a new spouse.

A committed and unabashed adulterer is just the sort ought to fear return of the Son of Man seated in Glory on the clouds....

[tanyev]

29. There ya go. In Trump's world, even the son of God is completely corrupt

and exists only to give Trump whatever he wants.

[ret5hd]

30. Jesus is too busy...

tending/harvesting grapes, lettuce, etc and hiding from immigration to bother with your sorry ass.

[bluesbassman]

46. Ironic isn't it? He doesn't want Jesus to be able to vote, but wants him to count the votes.

You see Don, Jesus is not an American citizen, so he can’t vote. What makes you think he should be allowed to count them?

[Conjuay]

32. Look at the way he scores golf

Two people can come up with two different tallies in Trump's brain- one favorable to trump and one based in reality.

[gab13by13]

34. I understand about talking about his nonsense

but it's also what TSF wants, to make his nonsense seem credible when we discuss it.

I laugh and treat his nonsense with mockery.

[Ray Bruns]

35. This is what I hate most about Trump.

He says something so delusional that it would get anyone else who said a thing thrown into a mental health facility. Then the MSM has to discuss it like it’s real thing and then they have to talk about it for two or three days until Trump has another brain fart.

Wash, rinse, repeat.

[FakeNoose]

38. It's another dog whistle ... they're all dog whistles to keep his people in line

We read this stuff and say he's delusional.

But the MAGAs read this stuff and all they hear is "Jesus" and "win California."

[Omnipresent]

37. Jesus helped him win 34 counts against him...

Hopefully, Jesus will help him also win an all expenses paid stay at Riker’s!

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

40. The people who brought you alternative facts now bring you

Alternative math.

How fucking stupid is that?

[JohnnyRingo]

42. If Jesus came down, Trump better run.

...and I don't mean for office.

[edbermac]

43. Hey DonOld, if Jesus came down...

… it would be to help you board the express train to Hell.

[MineralMan]

44. Further proof that "taking God's name in vain" does not get punished.

Apparently there is no deity paying attention.

[Gore1FL]

45. Jesus never had formal math training, so this tracks. nt

[SomedayKindaLove]

47. Pretty sure if Jesus came back

He wouldn’t be able to stop slapping the @#$& out of Trump

[TBF]

48. So I looked it up, and under FL law - Baker Act -

Florida's Baker Act law is a means of providing individuals with emergency services and temporary detention for up to 72 hours for mental health examination pursuant to Florida Statute Chapter 394. The Baker Act DOES NOT guarantee long term placement for individuals.

Just in case Melania is unaware of the help she could get in order to ensure her husband is not a danger to himself or others. At the very least an evaluation is in order.

[Crowman2009]

49. The only celestial being that will pay him a visit in the near future will be the grim reaper.

So keep eating McDonald's and chug that Diet Coke you orange prick!

[bucolic_frolic]

51. Hey, Jesus! Come on down!!

The Price is Right!

[Dave Bowman]

52. Rofl! Good one.

[everyonematters]

53. No person running for president in their right mind would say this.

He is not lying here. This is delusion. This is the guy people want with the nuclear codes.

[ScratchCat]

55. And here, six months ago, I said that if Trump was allowed to be the GOP candidate

Not if he won, but if he simply was allowed to be the candidate, America as we know it would be over. And this is why. The man clearly has no business being a candidate for POTUS and everyone in the media and his party knows it. But he continues to be presented as legitimate, even when what h says can't be justified in any way, shape or form. I saw another poster a few months ago stated "he is a third rate(at best) con man who even children see through". Its a spot on description. No other person would be given the time of day saying complete nonsense like the things he says. All the GOP had to do was say "we're done" and move on. It was that simple. All the media had to do was make a moral decision that they were not going to cover him as a political candidate after the sexual assault and hush money convictions. But, we continue....

[Renew Deal]

56. It's true. He would need a miracle to win California

[LiberalFighter]

57. What would Jesus say was the size of his Penthouse?

[PCIntern]

58. To quote a character from a Woody Allen film :

If Jesus came back now and saw what was going on, he could not stop throwing up.

[oasis]

71. Great quote from "Hannah and Her Sisters".

Max Von Sydow played the character who made the quip.

[LiberalFighter]

59. Why would Jesus need to come down and do the vote counting himself?

[Zoomie1986]

60. I wouldn't be so sure the NT protagonist cares about rape

He did say that all of the laws would exist until the end of time, and those laws he's talking about aren't friendly to rape victims.

Like how the law requires executing an urban rape victim who didn't cry out for help. Who cares if she had her mouth covered or a knife at her throat? Silence literally equaled death for an urban rape victim, always.

Or how the law requires a rural virgin rape victim to marry her rapist if he can afford to pay her dad off for damaging 'his' property.

Or how the law allows a father to sell a daughter into sexual slavery, whether or not she consents. Forcing sex without consent is rape, you know.

Or how the almighty himself made it okay to kidnap women and rape them to force them into marriage.

Or how the 'great' lawgiver Moses demanded the murder of female war captives who weren't virgins, but allowed taking captive virgins to do with as their captor willed. The virgins included little girls.

But, yeah, keep kidding yourself that the Space Buddy or his kid would have a problem with this adjudicated rapist, when their laws repeatedly demonstrate that they don't have a problem with sexual assault.

[JoseBalow]

61. "Jesus invented the laws of the universe"

LOL!

[Skittles]

62. more material for Sarah Cooper

[PufPuf23]

65. Trump needs rapture ASAP if Jehovah is low on lightning.

[Cha]

66. Cornered Rabid Rat says What!

[Initech]

67. This is the kind of thing that if a normal person said it...

The family would be having rather difficult conversations about what sort of long term mental treatment facility that person should be placed in. That is some next level derangement - both from Dr. Phil and Trump.

[Tree Lady]

68. If Jesus came down he would scatter all the magas

away from anywhere they shouldn't be, like he did with the pharisees. He would condemn them for being hypocrites and caring more about money than loving people.

[Tribetime]

69. That would be Jesus priority are you f in kidding me

[JoseBalow]

72. Yes, in your childish fantasies I'm sure you would

But here in the real world, you are still a LOSER