Is he dead yet?

[Orrex]

Squashed by violently shifting US/Canada borders?

Mauled by soon-to-be-expelled 240,000 Ukrainian expats?

Killed by a horde of dystopian sci-fi authors for making their bleak fictional worlds seem cheerful by comparison?

[Oopsie Daisy]

1. Being hit by falling space debris?

[CaptainTruth]

29. I was going to say that!

[RandomNumbers]

41. Oh, if only he'd been in the path of it

[malaise]

2. No but he's playing golf this weekend

Last edited Sat Mar 8, 2025, 09:12 AM - Edit history (2)

So there’s always a chance that his cart ends up on top of him in a bunker.
Imagine the headlines - both Hitler and Slobfather Donvict died in bunkers. That would be …drumroll…bonkers😀

[CTyankee]

50. Could a golf ball, aimed at his head and going maximum speed, knock him dead?

[malaise]

51. Why I think so

Last edited Sun Mar 9, 2025, 06:49 AM - Edit history (1)

That could happen😀

[BidenRocks]

53. Don't forget.

FORE!
Now you're good.

[malaise]

56. Translate please

I. am slow😀

[BidenRocks]

58. While golfing, a warning yell,

FORE! Is yelled as a warning a ball is coming at them.
Etiquette ya know.
Accidents happen and this was one of the first recommendations.

[malaise]

59. Thanks

😀

[William Seger]

3. Suicide mission in the trade war?

Putin ordered him to throw himself out of a window?

Nuralink surgery to connect his brain to AI Grok went wrong?

[Joinfortmill]

4. Was just telling my daughter how much I look forward to these posts.

[markie]

5. if only

we don't need no stinkin' Russian Assets

[SheltieLover]

6. Stuffed into meat grinder by dead ruskie soldiers' moms

Attacked by US troops not wanting to join ruskies in war?

Tripped over own feet & fell down stairs?

Massive heart attack, puzzling scientists due to absence of heart during necropsy?

(Note: for International Women's Day, russia is said to have given.mothers of dead soldiers flowers & meat grinders as a cruel joke. No source, it was posted on DU yesterday morning.)

Hope sprimgs eternal!

[WestMichRad]

18. Mmm, I'm liking the Fargo-related option!

…

[SheltieLover]

23. Lol

[Marthe48]

21. I saw the headline somewhere

Felon probably suggested the idea

[SheltieLover]

24. Wouldn't surprise me, Marthe

[634-5789]

7. Soon with any luck. That KFC and McBurgers have to be taking atoll, amirite?

[North Shore Chicago]

8. His face

rusted and all 3 of his brain cells spilled out.

[electric_blue68]

60. Actually that Latest Weird Make Up - his Face Does look kind of rusted!

[North Shore Chicago]

63. lol!

[electric_blue68]

64. Ty

[twodogsbarking]

10. ?

[Orrex]

14. Right?

[twodogsbarking]

11. Sneezed so hard his head blew off.

[Laha]

12. Option number three please

Now that would be truly poetic justice

[no_hypocrisy]

13. In the tradition of the Theater:

I ascribe to Deus Ex Machina, Latin for “god from the machine.” It refers to the crane or pulley system that brought actors playing gods over the stage in Greek and Roman plays. They were dropped in often towards the end to determine the ending and bring resolution.
and
The Hand of God, or Manus Dei in Latin.

Something very unexpected, unpredictable, and dramatic will happen.

I believe in it b/c I experienced it. My father was perpetually vindictive. My persecution ended when he died. But how he died . . . . He was 93 and shouldn't have been driving. He rear-ended a van at the gas pumps. He had no seat belt and his chest hit the steering column. He refused medical help and didn't follow up with his doctors. And he didn't tell me or my siblings about the accident. And for a week, he had an undiagnosed partial tear of his aorta, meaning that he had a slow bleed into his chest. And he suffered a heart attack. The police/EMS didn't get to him in time. While I didn't wish for his death (exactly), but his demise was akin to my above-referenced concepts.

[Marthe48]

22. Maybe we can put a rush order in

to deal with felon.

The truth is strange

[no_hypocrisy]

25. Or move the DEM to Act II instead of Act IV.

[LymphocyteLover]

15. No, but he should be

[Joinfortmill]

16. Look forward to these daily posts. Thank you!

[paleotn]

17. Love your 3rd one.

In the immortal words of Ed Tom Bell in No Country for Old Men "You can't make up such a thing as that. I dare you to even try."

[dreamland]

19. Hit by falling shrapnel from Elin's space X

[LSparkle]

20. Should be "Is IT dead yet?"

If Vice President Harris can be referred to by her first name alone, I think the proper pronoun for That Thing is not “he” but IT (as in the Stephen King novel).

[MiHale]

26. Strangled by his own 'weave' of words...

Ambiguity Aspiration.

[Redleg]

27. Persistence will pay off- one day the answer will be the affirmative

Until that day there is pain and suffering for the rest of us.

[niyad]

28. Alas, my bottle of bubbly remains unopened.

[SheltieLover]

36. ...

Hopefully soon. 🥂

[samnsara]

30. I'll start....Marco Rubio, in the Oval Office...... ,

...with an eagle statue.

[NH Ethylene]

31. My husband told me yesterday that he had great news.

And I said, "Is he dead?" Sadly, his news fell short of my high expectations.

[DENVERPOPS]

32. The reality is

that even if LardASS croaks, This NEW Republican Party will put someone in there just as bad, if not worse.....

And that is the Truth of it, folks.........can you imagine Vance or Musk as president? and they would be there for two terms....

[niyad]

39. They are already in charge. Orange TRAITOR** is the bright, shiny thing..

Neither couchfucker or the aparthied nazi would have his cult following.

[DENVERPOPS]

49. I guess you are right

Musk is definitely Putin's new lap poodle........I have absolutely NO idea how Vance got in there......He is really buzzaro

[Orrex]

57. That's exactly my view

The KKKult will cast about for a new idol, but neither Vance nor President Musk has the raw, lumbering vileness that the MAGAts love so dearly.

[electric_blue68]

61. Sort of disagree bc these others never had the cult following of Magats

Not the "magnetism" he has

[Aviation Pro]

33. Killed by a reciprocal

Where his fecal matter was extruded from his anus like lips while his words were farted out of his asshole.

[58Sunliner]

34. Sucked up by a sinkhole in a sand trap? Eaten by giant sand worms?

[Wicked Blue]

35. Mangled by whizzing chainsaw "accidentally" released

by ketone-soaked charlatan

[CaptainTruth]

37. So ignorant he forgot to breathe?

[Martin Eden]

38. Driving over the Frederick Douglass Memorial Bridge, JD was fellating Donald in the back of the limo

The driver, shocked at what he saw because usually it's the other way around, jerked the wheel and sent the car plunging into the Anacostia River.

The driver and SS agent managed to get out, but they were the only survivors.

[republianmushroom]

40. Another day, going to need more hopes and prayers, maybe tomorrow.

Waiting for my voo doo doll, maybe that will help.

[Blue Owl]

42. The only thing that would bring me joy.....

[bluestarone]

43. I heard a Rumor that

His head is dead, and waiting for other body parts to react.

[NNadir]

44. Runover by an out of control "self driving" Tesla tank like car?

[no_hypocrisy]

45. Just thought of something that references my Deus Ex Machina response above:

1. Musk fired most of the Air Traffic Control workers.
2. Who knows how experienced and skilled the replacements are.
3. Without fail, Trump leaves DC every Friday to go to Mar-A-Lago and returns Sunday.
4. He flies.
5. Shit happens.

[TBF]

46. Only in my dreams, well, really they are sort of nightmares

I love these posts so much. We need a big asteroid aimed at mar-a-lago ... of course Leon's rocket was pretty close the other day.

[DingleBerryNW]

47. Truth: Every frickin' morning,

since the anus’ first inauguration, I ask my partner if the he’s is still breathing. The answer is always a disappointment, but knowing that day is approaching gives me hope…

[Dem4life1234]

48. Why hasn't the KFC taken effect?

I keep checking DU to see the actual great news.

He's almost 80 fat as hell and a terrible diet, easily angered, what is taking so long????

That would be the day I'll do a handstand against the wall.

[The Blue Flower]

52. Stepped on his tie and strangled himself

A girl can dream.

[RainCaster]

54. Two Hellfire missiles hit Mar aLardo

Got TSF, Leon and whatever sycophants happened to be there at the time.

[Aussie105]

55. Hellfire missiles?

Effective, but hard to cover up as an accident.

Now a supersonic golf ball, while he is out on the green, would be just as effective, and be more likely to be accepted as a tragic accident.

Now, excuse me. Back to work.
I'm working on a miniature drone capable of supersonic guided flight, and it just happens to look remarkably like a golf ball.
Pure coincidence, I assure you!

[electric_blue68]

62. While Not a Sci Fi writer I did illustrations for SW fanzines, and a reader and viewer of SF for nearly 60 yrs!...

I love your
"Killed by a horde of dystopian sci-fi authors for making their bleak fictional worlds seem cheerful by comparison?"

Baaaaahahahaaaaaaaaaa

[Wicked Blue]

65. Perished in a pile of rare earth minerals

harvested from the Chernobyl nuclear site and sent to him as a gift by President Zelensky