trump is driving the wrong way down the expressway -- comments on EmptyWheel

[erronis]

https://www.emptywheel.net/2025/04/03/stupid-or-evil-its-definitely-not-liberation/

Just too good not to share:

trump is driving the wrong way down the expressway…
welding glasses obscuring dim headlights hurtling tons of machinery approaching 140 miles an hour….
Bobbing to the tunes of ‘Rack n’ Ruin, the White House house band….wheezin’ horns to a slurry of booze and god knows what.. all the while…cars whizzing by as they lean on their horns. ‘hey! assshole! pull over!
Yer goin’ the wrong way you blind fuuuucker!
Geeezus, he’s gonna get us all killed!

Meanwhile, on the noise over to faux…. “another glorious achievement by the hair furor!”

Oblivious to sirens and flashing strobe lights on the cop cars….

My pappy said, “Son, you’re gonna drive me to drinkin’
If you don’t stop drivin’ that Hot Trade Likin’ ”

Pulled out of San Pedro late one night
The moon and the stars was shinin’ bright
We was drivin’ up to Capitol Hill
Passing cars like they was standing still

All of a sudden in a wink of an eye
A foreign sedan passed us by
I said, “Boys, that’s a mark for me”

By then the taillight was all you could see
Now the fellas was ribbin’ me for bein’ behind
So I thought I’d make the Linkin’ unwind
Took my foot off the gas and man alive
I shoved it on down into overdrive

Wound it up to a 110
My speedometer said that I hit top end
My foot was glued like lead to the floor
That’s all there is and there ain’t no more

Now the boys all thought I’d lost my sense
And telephone poles looked like a picket fence
They said, “Slow down, I see spots
The lines on the road just look like dots”

Took a corner, sideswiped a truck
Crossed my fingers just for luck
My fenders was clickin’ the guardrail posts
The guy beside me was white as a ghost

Smoke was comin’ from out of the back
When I started to gain on that Kia hatchback
Knew I could catch him, I thought I could pass
Don’t you know by then we’d be low on gas?

We had flames comin’ from out of the side
Feel the tension, man, what a ride
I said, “Look out, boys, I’ve got a license to fly”
And that Kia pulled over and let us by

Now all of a sudden she started to knockin’
And down in the dips, she started to rockin’
I looked in my mirror, a red light was blinkin’
The cops was after my Hot Rod Linkin’

They arrested me and they put me in jail
And called my pappy to throw my bail
And he said, “Son, you’re gonna drive me to drinkin’
If you don’t stop drivin’ that Hot Rod Lincoln”

. . .

[sop]

1. "They arrested me and they put me in jail, And called my pappy to throw my bail.."

Some of the best lyrics ever written...Commander Cody and His Lost Planet Airmen.

[erronis]

2. More from a resident wise-ass at EmptyWheel

https://www.emptywheel.net/2025/04/04/fridays-with-nicole-sandler-51/#comment-1093299

Ranter Rave Op

Uh-oh, Peter Navarro,
With tales as tall as Kilimanjaro,
Your tariff expert, so bizarro,
Make-believe man: beg, steal or borrow.

Ron Vara took us for a ride,
Homunculus or Mr. Hyde?
By his gaze you’ve tariff-eyed,
And all because of pride you lied.

How exactly will you spin
this apparent mortal sin?
Or maybe it’s a looney-bin
you prefer with your kingpin.

With ambition from pole to pole,
GOP now owns the rigmarole,
(But despite rumors of a grassy knoll)
Even Cancun Ted wants Cruz control.