Bezos guests to be given plastic monogrammed bottles for urine at wedding

[orangecrush]

Bezos Wedding Guests Given Monogrammed Plastic Bottles To Urinate In During Ceremony

theonion.com/bezos-w...

— The Onion (@theonion.com) 2025-06-25T14:10:00.000Z

[surfered]

1. Now I'm glad we weren't invited

[BoRaGard]

2. Gee, I was hoping for a boutonniere and maybe some mints.

A bottle of piss just ain't the same.

Republicon billionaires really are different.

[Danascot]

10. Nah

they just give you the bottle. You have to supply your own piss, freakin cheapskates.

[Attilatheblond]

3. Was the wedding planner a retired truck driver?

[Demovictory9]

9. I recently had road trip across California desert. Pee bottles the whole way

I was passenger, looking out the window...all along the freeway...pee bottles of all types and sizes..full of pee of all colors.

Ewww

[Just_Vote_Dem]

16. "I spy...with my little eye...

Something yellow"

[orangecrush]

12. Close

[Srkdqltr]

4. Eeuuuu. 😝 . Wait! What do the women do? No outside plumbing. I call hoax.

Can you just see all these rich folk, million dollar designer dressed women with pee running down, nooo. This is a hoax.

[karynnj]

5. It is the Onion

[BoRaGard]

7. Onions don't necessarily make you piss

But they can make you cry.

Or, as in the case of this story, they can make you laugh

[Srkdqltr]

8. Of course its the onion!! I knew that. Duh!🙃😉🙃😉

[usonian]

6. It's The Onion, folks

Delivery drivers aren't allowed pee breaks.

I have to wonder if Jeff is spending R&D money on a lead-urine battery.

Pisser!

[orangecrush]

11. Busted!

[usonian]

13. Thou shall not pee in the canals!

Gondoliers union objects to it.

[Marthe48]

14. For his or theirs?

Send it on to traitor felon for another golden shower :/

[Liberal In Texas]

15. Very clever inference about reports Amazon employees had to resort to

peeing in bottles because they're not allowed time to find a rest room.