Is he dead yet?

[Orrex]

Head bitten off during Ozzy's farewell performance?

Killed by disgusted opera aficionados?

Quietly disappeared by the House Speaker during a five week vacation?


Just fucking died already for literally any reason whatsoever?

[True Dough]

1. Got one for you, Orrex...

[Orrex]

2. Distressingly accurate

[malaise]

4. No

but what folks have already accumulated re his close friendship with Jeffrey is keeping him awake at night. Word is that he is really worried that he has about the same chance of escaping this criminal trap of his own making as did Gilbert Genesta.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gilbert_Genesta

[Blue Full Moon]

3. Maybe this would work

[SheltieLover]

9. Hahaha!

Good one!

[malaise]

27. Nice

😀

[malaise]

5. But look who died

https://www.democraticunderground.com/132282315

[twodogsbarking]

10. But wait, there's more.

https://www.foxnews.com/politics/heritage-foundation-founder-edwin-j-feulner-dies-83

[SheltieLover]

11. 3's the charm...

[twodogsbarking]

13. Maybe 300 eh.

[Gimpyknee]

6. Nope

[Torchlight]

7. Other than that, what do you think of the guy?

[SheltieLover]

8. Burned up over Smokey the Bear's birthday party? ( https://www.democraticunderground.com/10114388#post3 )

Pummeled by farmers on brink of bankruptcy bwcause of ICE? ( https://www.democraticunderground.com/100220504765 )

Nightmares of defenstration after top ruskie judge meets "mysterious" end? ( https://www.democraticunderground.com/100220505150 )

Deleted by an AI "coding crisis?" ( https://www.democraticunderground.com/100220505781 )

[twodogsbarking]

12. Melaaaaaaaniaaaaah fixes him some tea. A special Russian blend.

[Blue Owl]

19. Tea for two.... or, make that one....

[hlthe2b]

14. ♫♫ Epstein's Coming, Hide Your Heart, Girl! ♫

♫♫♫Three Dog Night: Eli's Epstein's Coming! Hide your heart, girl Trump! ♫♫♫



Soundtrack to the fantasy....

[malaise]

28. That bear will outrun

Slobby😀. Oops!

[no_hypocrisy]

15. Tried to move his ball on the ninth fairway at Turnberry, and

was stomped to death by a Kelpie.

A kelpie, or water kelpie (Scottish Gaelic: each-uisge), is a mythical shape-shifting spirit inhabiting lochs in Scottish folklore. Legends of these shape-shifting water-horses, under various names, spread across the British Isles, appearing in the Northern Isles, Irish, Manx, Northern English, and Welsh folklore. It is usually described as a grey or white[1] horse-like creature, able to adopt human form. Some accounts state that the kelpie retains its hooves when appearing as a human, leading to its association with the Christian idea of Satan as alluded to by Robert Burns in his 1786 poem "Address to the Devil".


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelpie#https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelpie#

By Thomas Nugent, CC BY-SA 2.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=13581598

/revision/latest/thumbnail/width/360/height/360?cb=20161129180444

[niyad]

16. Alas, my bottle of bubbly remains unopened.

Still, the day is yet young. One dares to dream.

[Joinfortmill]

17. Every day closer and nearer to dead.

[surfered]

18. Life's uncertain and the end is always near.

As my doctor explained, “What doesn’t kill you today, will try again tomorrow.”

Some day…..we will be free of this meddling King.

[spinbaby]

20. His diet alone should kill him

With a diet consisting of Diet Coke, fast food, and well-done steak with ketchup, how can he still be alive? Somewhere, I’m sure, a YouTuber did Trump’s diet for a month and documented the health consequences.

[niyad]

21. Morgan Spurlock.

[spinbaby]

23. I'm sure Trump's diet is worse than Supersize Me

And didn’t Morgan Spurlock die a year or two ago?

[niyad]

24. Morgan ate only mcd's for one month, gained 25 pounds. He died May 2024.

[republianmushroom]

22. Not last night, damn, but, we are a day closer.

[Wicked Blue]

25. Has a fatal stroke when he finds out that his tariffs

will hugely increase the cost of golf clubs.

Moronic ICE thugs accidentally deport him to Gitmo.

[Blue Owl]

26. Someone threw his "Get Out Of Jail Free" card into traffic