Welcome to DU!
The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards.
Join the community:
Create a free account
Support DU (and get rid of ads!):
Become a Star Member
Latest Breaking News
Editorials & Other Articles
General Discussion
The DU Lounge
All Forums
Issue Forums
Culture Forums
Alliance Forums
Region Forums
Support Forums
Help & Search
The Borowitz Report-DC Mayor Says Best Way for Trump to Empty Streets is by Throwing Another Birthday Parade
Last edited Tue Aug 12, 2025, 08:08 AM - Edit history (1)
DC Mayor Says Best Way for Trump to Empty Streets is by Throwing Another Birthday Parade.
— James Tate (@jamestate121.bsky.social) 2025-08-11T23:10:47.984Z
~~~Andy Borowitz 🤣🤣🤣
https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/dc-mayor-says-best-way-for-trump
DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA (The Borowitz Report)—The mayor of Washington DC suggested on Monday that the best way for Donald J. Trump to empty the streets of the nation’s capital would be to throw himself another birthday parade.
“You want to see people clear out?” Muriel Bowser said to reporters. “Get a bunch of those squeaky old tanks rolling down the streets and you won’t see anyone for miles.”
“Not to take anything away from the National Guard,” she aded. “But in terms of getting people to vanish, nothing in history has come close to President Trump’s parade.”
At the White House, press secretary Karoline Leavitt blasted the mayor’s plan, arguing, “Far from making people leave the city, a birthday parade would only make them fall asleep, like Melania.”
“You want to see people clear out?” Muriel Bowser said to reporters. “Get a bunch of those squeaky old tanks rolling down the streets and you won’t see anyone for miles.”
“Not to take anything away from the National Guard,” she aded. “But in terms of getting people to vanish, nothing in history has come close to President Trump’s parade.”
At the White House, press secretary Karoline Leavitt blasted the mayor’s plan, arguing, “Far from making people leave the city, a birthday parade would only make them fall asleep, like Melania.”
1 replies
= new reply since forum marked as read
= new reply since forum marked as read
Kick in to the DU tip jar?
This week we're running a special pop-up mini fund drive. From Monday through Friday we're going ad-free for all registered members, and we're asking you to kick in to the DU tip jar to support the site and keep us financially healthy.
As a bonus, making a contribution will allow you to leave kudos for another DU member, and at the end of the week we'll recognize the DUers who you think make this community great.