Reviews are in for the Melania film:

[Hassin Bin Sober]

[hlthe2b]

1. I think it is asking waaay TOO much to ask anyone to actually see it to review it...

So, those are probably as spot-on as the real deal....

[democrank]

2. Maybe Trump will grab someone else's Oscar and give it to his oh-so darling wife.

The First Couple could have a ceremony for this at the TRUMP-kennedy Center.

[PatSeg]

14. Ha, ha!

I wouldn't be surprised at all. The Trumps never EARN anything - they beg, cajole, steal, threaten, or just make up their own prizes. I can picture Trump as head of the Trump-Kennedy Center creating an event to award his wife with some gaudy, fake trophy.

[Norrrm]

4. Funny but not real. Roger is dead.

[mitch96]

7. I think it's a dot com company using his name to review movies... yes, he died a while ago...Interesting guy..

https://www.rogerebert.com

[Hassin Bin Sober]

9. Yep. His site is very much alive and relevant.

[barbtries]

19. his webpage is not.

https://www.rogerebert.com/

however, I checked and they haven't reviewed this one.

[paleotn]

22. No, Roger is not dead. He just went home.

[Blumancru]

27. So is the box office for this movie.

[hlthe2b]

31. His website remains up and hires reviewers to continue to post new content under the name.

[Skittles]

37. UM

pretty sure most people can see this is snark

[ShazamIam]

5. Savage reviews and well deserved. nt

[DinahMoeHum]

6. A parody promotion for the film, via social media. . .

[leftieNanner]

10. OMG! 😂 NT

[popsdenver]

18. As with the countless Republican women

in Trump's administration and CABAL.......

The only difference between Melanoma, (and all of the others), versus a street walking crack whore is.......

There are many things that the crack whore WON'T DO, for ANY amount of money..........

[Hassin Bin Sober]

36. Lol

[twodogsbarking]

8. She may be my favorite person

to make fun of. Melaaaaahniaaaaaah, ha, ha. Thanks and keep it coming.

[BidenRocks]

11. Show of hands

Who believed those reviews were real?

They should force chump and his admin to watch this on an endless loop.

[niyad]

13. I knew they were not real, but pretty sure they are accurate, even if

epstein was watching from his specially--created circle in hell.

[BidenRocks]

25. I hope they didn't waste real film.

Digital is cheaper to DELETE!

Short of hostages, who is the audience?

Waterboard or Melania? You know.

[niyad]

29. I read that at the premier in one of London's movie houses, ONE

ticket was sold. Not one hundred. ONE single, solitary ticket.

[BidenRocks]

33. Now THAT made me smile!

[FakeNoose]

26. Nobody has seen it yet, so the reviews are all fake

The question is, who in their right mind would pay money to see this movie? Besides Jeff Bezos, that is.
I have an Amazon Prime membership and I get this movie for free. But I still won't watch it.

[orleans]

32. i'm assuming the reviews are fake but film critics always have screenings to review films before it is

released for public viewing

[niyad]

38. see post 29.

[bmichaelh]

12. Priorities of ultrarich

Ultrarich in this country complain about an increase in their taxes.

But have no problem spending $40 million dollars on this dud.

[llmart]

44. I thought it was more like $75 million.

Either way, an abomination. The fact that some ugly-ass billionaire like Bezos can "waste" $75 million on this flop while so many people are struggling to keep the heat on and put food on the table for their families is criminal in my mind.

[bmichaelh]

45. Marketing

$75 million with marketing cost.

I always heard that as rule of thumb that a movie needs to make three times its production budget, to break even.

Marketing, Theaters' cut, etc.

[llmart]

46. We have some creative minds on DU.

Maybe they could put together our own DU "Mockumentary" of the Slovenian porn star. I'll bet it would get more views than Bozo's.

[cab67]

15. These aren't real.

That said - I'm sure the movie will suck. I have no interest in ever seeing it.

[paleotn]

20. If people were honest, they would be.

[mr715]

16. I named my roomba Melania

bc she sucks dirt.

[maliaSmith]

17. Review

Wow. Did they show her oiled up nude photo in it?
My bad,

[paleotn]

21. Be Best!

Pole dancer inspiration.

[0rganism]

23. Is it weird that I want to see it now?

Last edited Tue Jan 27, 2026, 08:46 PM - Edit history (1)

I came for the Legos, but I stayed for the explosive diarrhea...

[Emile]

24. 😆 lol

[mysteryowl]

28. Nice!

[chouchou]

30. They should change the Title..

The Thing (1952)

[orleans]

34. here's an article about reviews

https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2026/01/letterboxd-melania-documentary-amazon-bezos-movie-reviews/

So it was with some solace that I perused the Letterboxd page of Melania, which made for some entertaining reading, as users have pre-swarmed the review section to push the score down and let their voices rip.

Here’s a sample of some of my faves. And yeah, there are so many spicier versions on the page itself, not fit for publication here. I’ll leave that to you to scroll through. These are on the PG-rated end:

I really don’t care, do u? ½ star.
ABOLISH ICE. RELEASE THE EPSTEIN FILES
I would, however, love to see a scene-for-scene reenactment by Laura Benanti.
Death of Cinema 🤝 Death of American Democracy
Lol. No
Nobody asked for this absolute piece of flaming garbage.
I heard all of her lines are taken from a Michelle Obama documentary

[allegorical oracle]

35. So when does TSF start pressuring people to give her an Oscar?

[niyad]

39. You mean he hasn't already?

[Ray Bruns]

40. "If syphilis we're a movie"🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I’m still laughing at that one.

[Wonder Why]

41. Is Melania a skin cancer or a mosquito-borne infectious disease?

[bmichaelh]

42. Narcissism

Reports are that Melania is none too happy that the events in Minneapolis are eclipsing movie about her.

https://www.rawstory.com/melania-movie/

Is she a narcissist just like her husband?

[Mr.Bee]

43. What, There's a Movie??

NT!