Is he dead yet?

[Orrex]

Proved that "suicide is only one option?"

Rage-induced coronary when he couldn't find the Superbowl on tv today?

Vaporized by space laser reflecting off of foil party balloons?


Just fucking died already for literally any reason at all?

[SheltieLover]

1. Accidentally zapped by a laser?

Possibly...pedofelonrapistslob has been mia for a while, and I doubt he's going for a gold medal in playing Where's Waldo.

[SocialDemocrat61]

2. Found murdered in the Lincoln bedroom

And these podcasters are investigating

[Submariner]

3. No, he isn't yet, but

in the investigation of Trump’s death, if your name comes up as his cause of death from something like a stroke, because he heard your name as the author of the “Is He Dead Yet?” thread on the internet, I’m going to get Sen. Angus King to nominate you for the Nobel Peace Prize, the Medal of Freedom, and The Congressional Medal of Honor.

Think Sargent York, Audie Murphy, Orrex!

[Orrex]

20. Wow! Now I have something else to look forward to!

[surfered]

4. Sadly, no.

[twodogsbarking]

19. Shot down by The Red Baron?

[niyad]

5. Alas, my bottle of bubbly remains unopened.

Still, the day is yet young. One dares to dream.

[surfered]

7. Soon, from possible dart frog poisoning if there is a merciful God

🍾🥂🍾🥂🍾🥂🍾🥂🍾🥂🍾🥂

[niyad]

10. If god were merciful, we would not be in this mess!

[surfered]

11. Good point!

[SheltieLover]

13. Right now would be good!

🥂🥂🥂🥂🥂🥂

[DeeDeeNY]

24. Actually any time would be good

But the sooner the better!

[SheltieLover]

25. Agreed, Dee!

[SheltieLover]

12. Soon...

🥂🥂🥂🥂🥂🥂

[surfered]

6. Died after Venezuelan Secret Service secreted a pair of Dart Frogs into his underwear

[malaise]

9. I see what you did there

😀

[malaise]

8. No but

The way his goons at DOJ have muddied up the Epstein waters will come back to haunt all of them

https://www.democraticunderground.com/10143616509

[Raine1967]

14. If ETTD, then someone tell him (Gag Warning)

to touch himself.

[WestMichRad]

15. No rational person

… thinks that today would be too soon for news of his demise.

Even my cat agrees!

[OGBuzz]

16. Recalled home by his

'father' when it was accidentally revealed to the world that those cankles are actually cloven hooves.

[hlthe2b]

17. Failed to realize (as the cats of the world unite)...

that cats HATE oranges (and orange blobs)...

[twodogsbarking]

18. I think Robert Frost would approve the changes.

Some say he will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if het had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To know that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.

[BigmanPigman]

21. Abducted by aliens?

When I try to fall asleep I think of ways to get rid of him.

[Blumancru]

22. Poo Tin conspires with

De facto President Miller and Mailorderia to mix polonium and the smegma of the poison dart frog with his tartar sauce. He fires one last bottle of ketchup at the wall and threatens one last lawsuit, then he belongs to the ages….

[ABC123Easy]

23. Nope

[irisblue]

26. Not as of 1 pm Washington time in the US